ironpony wrote:
Oh okay I see. That's too bad. As for women who are in average leagues refusing to settle, because they still want all the hot guys who all the other women are getting too, why is it that those women refuse to settle, or where did all this stubbornness come from?
I agree this is part of the explanation (I posted earlier or in another thread about this lag effect between women still thinking they are hot in their 30s and 40s and it taking a while for them to adjust to the new reality of rapid depreciation of looks, meaning this miss out on a lot of potentially very suitable partners). But I also think a large part of it is emotional - they lose confidence after seeing their friends marrying and having kids, and think they are unwanted or don't deserve happiness. Another explanation is that frankly loads of men are just a***holes, the good ones get taken off the market quickly, and the ones left are very emotionally juvenile, still want to be players, are unadjusted and selfish etc. and women just think it's not worth the hassle of dating - it's hard work dating while working having social life and hobbies, and you meet a load of unappealing guys, and there is always that risk of some loser freak stalking them, threats of violence, scenes, harassment by some man-baby.
I don't think many of us men realise just how disgusting so many men are to and around women. I learned some truly horrible things about some acquaintances of mine after the #metoo movement when some females I know revealed some things. So basically a switch goes off in many women's minds and they close off the idea of dating, even though they still want the ideal of a partner and family. There are also other points around them coming round to the idea of actually liking their independence, financial simplicity, there are tons of apparently amazing sex toys around that can provide a lot of pleasure, so unless someone 'amazing' comes along to sweep them off their feet why should they settle. I suspect that is some of the internal monologue that happens.