It's Really Not an NT or Aspie Thing....

Post Reply New Topic

^This is the absolute opposite of the point I was trying to make. Aspies may be more vulnerable to exploitation by individuals who are less than psychologically healthy because of a lack of relationship experience, being too trusting, assuming that "NT" means "well adjusted," etc. People who are confident and psychologically healthy are typically less likely to make ill-informed judgments about others, and to be more tolerant of differences.

I don't know... it seems like only women with psychological issues would want me anyway...

Where did you get your psychology degree? A weetbix box?
truly confident people don't judge others - they don't need to.[/quote]

Love your humor. I'm not sure what a truly confident person is. I did not mean to judge one way or another. I am talking about what is attractive to people in a relationship. Not saying one way of being is better than another at all. Can't say if being analytic or creative or meticulous is better or worse than being warm, sensitive to others. Guess it depends on better for what. I can see where you may have interpreted my statement that way though. Sorry about that. Simply meant that some people are more vulnerable than others. Vulnerable people may be attractive to others for various reasons. And vulnerable people may be less attractive to some people for various reasons. Somebody wanting a healthy relationship that is going to lead to gettting married and having children may look for or be attracted to certain characteristics in others. Sorry if I seemed to be judgemental. I guess I did not express things well. My bad.

I agree with this, and I want to add that I find the few posts that stated that NT's who are with Aspies have psychological difficulties and confidence issues, or implied that they have something wrong with them highly offensive. I find it a slap in the face to not only NTs but Aspies also. That was quite insulting! You are wrong to imply that a NT person, who is psychologically and emotionally stable, wouldn't be with an aspie! I do think a few of us out here would get quite heated over that statement. I for one and quite stable, and am quite happy with my Aspie guy, thanks! Enough said!

Usually when I have jumped into being sexual with guys I date, it was more kind of desperation on my part....like worrying the guy would lose interest or I'd have a better chance of one sticking with me if i was willing to have sex right away. So not so sure about that necessarily being a sign of an abusive past. Every time I've done that a relationship didn't develop but in retrospect I am glad, since none of those guys were what I really wanted nor did I feel 100% comfortable being myself around them. I took a break for a while after those failures and then met my current boyfriend...but I made a point to hang out with him a few times before having sex as jumping right into it seems to spoil things, also it gave me a chance to evaluate if he was genuinely interested in me or just looking to have sex. I think it can be a good approach to wait till after at least a few dates or whatever before having sex.

I have never been much into casual sex, though looking back at some of my past relationship attempts that is pretty much what I did...but I was of the impression things were going somewhere with guys that happened with, only to have them inform me after a time that they didn't actually want anything serious with me.

Either way though I have a good relationship now, yet I wouldn't say I've totally got my act together in all areas of life I am on SSI after all...but I suppose it is true I try to be conscious of any of my issues and work on improving things where I can.