Why don't single women hereput their pics up as an avatar?

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no no no no


It was a beret.

Not a crown.

I don't know how. I'm not hideous or a supermodel, I would much rather someone get to know ME instead of the image. Besides, I hear lots of stories about girls and guys using other ppl's images as their own so how sure are you that the person you're chatting with is that smokin hot? Wouldn't they be offline, on a date instead of on a chat or dating website?

because women on here get harassed by men a lot already, even when they DON'T have a picture of themselves up/

Citation needed.

as a moderator, i can confirm this. it's not so prevalent that it drives all of the women away, but it is more common than you may be aware of. it may be true for men too - i just haven't seen any complaints about it.

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postp4270792.html#4270792

Well, I should've guessed as much. The reason for my previous comment was that I encountered something that resembled a presumption with no actual sources to back it up. Much like the statement "dragons eat people, period".

I've not been unfortunate enough to actually witness such harassment myself.

Thankyou, HopefulRomantic. I fear I open up too much about these things, but if I can't talk about it here, where can I talk about it? It's not a socially acceptable problem to have. I think bipolar mood swings have been exacerbating these sorts of problems too. I can't call myself attractive because it seems very vain and presumptuous. Yet other people say it all the time. I don't know whether I should accept this or refute this. Even inside my head, I am uncertain - because I consider accepting it, then I think - if I do believe this I am likely to be narcissistic, and therefore it isn't true anyway. I want to wish to be ugly, or unnoticeable, but I know this is wrong to wish for this when others may wish to be like me. But then I think - what is beauty? If I wish to be ugly - isn't that another form of by extension judging certain others as unnoticeable or ugly and myself as pretty or beautiful - thus another form of narcissism, and a delusion and not truth or reality.

So I am trapped in a thought loop that doesn't end. It's such a stupid thing to waste thought space on too. I could obsess about something positive, something constructive, something useful to others. And instead - this. I have other interests/obsessions too, but this does take up a lot of space - most especially I think because it cannot be resolved. I think if it would just be resolved it would be over, but it's like an infinite paradox that can not be resolved. All I really want from life is to be a good person and help others. Appearance is completely unnecessary for these goals. But how can I be a good person with shallow self-absorbed thoughts like this running through my head all the time? Obsessing about my own appearance is a stupid, waste of my time. It's important to keep myself healthy and fit, so I can function as well as possible to achieve these goals, but beyond that it doesn't matter for the big things at all (for smaller things, like looking nice, clean, and well dressed so it's pleasant for people to look at you, it does matter).

I'm rambling. But this is about as honest as it gets.

oh you knitting flirt!! !! i used to have gigantic needles like this (the pic is not mine - i didn't make sweaters for my needles):



and i also used to knit with teeny-tiny sewing needles and thread. because well, i can't do anything normally.

Last edited by hyperlexian on 26 Dec 2011, 4:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I like that you did that. I really hate that idea. I didn't know they still did things like that.

It means that people with sub optimal learning ability or a difference in learning style get punished for things beyond their control.

oh yeah - and that's just the one part of it. The past trauma part is a whole other can of worms.

Whoah baby, those are some big ones

Are those penis-shaped dildos in sweaters?

yes, some kids has special needs but the religious community (it was an anabaptist Hutterite Colony) tried to prevent referrals to specialists for diagnosis. i managed to convince individual parents to sign for it, and a political divide ensued. i created a lot of problems there.

too pointy.

How cute!! But painful..?