if a guy sleeps with 100 ugly women is he an alpha?

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It was commonly believed before that working and voting were against women's nature, "controlled by their emotions too much" they said.

So never say never ;p.

Well, it's a communist-style revolution after all, so what do you expect other than a dicktator as final outcome?

Wouldn't it just be better to be a tater-dick?

To the Original Poster & any formerly decent males who are drowning in the vortex of the PUA culture:

PLEASE STOP. I understand your dilemma. It is awful that men have to approach women & suffer rejection & such.
& maybe now, you might really only want to have sex with a lot of hot women and feel really cool and all. However, the time will most likely come at some point, when you seek legitimate human companionship. And, when you want that, it's a good idea to not have made yourself a repulsive person.

I do understand the frustration guys have, and I can't imagine. Actually, I can, because while OliveOilMom was right in her posts (that if a woman wants to have sex, it's right there), why would we? Most of us want love. We want to be cared about & respected, in a way that will last & sex is part of that happy, total package for most women. But love, real love, is probably harder for us to find than it is for guys to have sex. You could at least hire prostitutes. There is no substitute for what we want. :)

And PUA culture makes it even harder for us to find it... because it takes VULNERABLE MEN- NO-ONE USING PUA SITES IS AN ALPHA, btw, if alphas exist, which they don't, because we no longer live in packs, because alphas wouldn't be FOLLOWING what other men say to do & this automatically makes you beta. Duh! =/ At that point 100 women of any appearance won't help you, if that is your goal!

Because, you have accepted that who you are is wrong instead of learning to be confident in your own skin without tricks. Why isn't the advice to go meet smart, cool, understanding women that value you..? Why does it say, try to find the most beautiful girl her will bed you, score, then dump her like a bad habit? And why in the world would any of you listen? It is cynical, misogynistic, antisocial, and in its way defeatist.

All of these methods, tricks & manipulations will RUIN your personality, will RUIN your ability to relate to women as anything other than conquests and will RUIN your chances with the kind of girl/woman you will want to be with for the rest of your life.

Because when you finally do meet a girl with the intellectual wherewithal to understand, accept & love you, she won't have anything to do with someone like that.... (My argument won't work if you like airheads, of course. Prepare for a life of hearing about the Kardashians & Lindsey Lohan, though! ;) )

I cannot tell you how many guys I meet & think... Wow! I bet he would have been SO cool BEFORE the advent of PUA culture. I probably would have liked him if he wasn't a giant phony- if the losers hadn't gotten to him first! A lot of us KNOW the tricks at this point... I have gone to bars with friends (& do not like them! lol) .... Do you know what the girls are talking & laughing about in the restroom? The guys that think they're PUA's.... because it's obvious... & because most girls don't like it. But, most of them don't make fun of guys who are simple & who are themselves.

You don't have to be a rocket scientist to see through these stupid games. & honestly, this isn't nice or even decent. PUA's take advantage of a woman's desire for LOVE in order to get into her PANTS. Is this how you would want to be treated if you were female? Is this how you would want your mother or sister to be treated? If so, why?

You know what? You're an Aspie. That's a gift. Do you know how many women out there are looking for someone smart & honest that has a brain, someone the isn't JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER GUY THEY MEET? They just don't know how to find you. But, you pull these tricks... you are no longer honest... you are no longer special... & you're not even all that smart anymore because you are thinking only in the short-term....

So, before you become a farce of who you used to be, please think about what is important to you in life. Otherwise, you will hurt yourself and probably 100 "ugly" women in the process.

and oh, We must burn PUA books and PUA materials!

You've never gone out to a bar alone, dressed nicely, to hear a band have you?

Or, even worse, to ladies night at a bar where you get drinks for a quarter? If you just want to get drunk, even alone, that's the best place to go. Dress nice like you are looking for a guy, then sit back and get your buzz on. Just smile and tell them "I'm waiting for someone, but thank you anyway!" Bring cab far though, don't drive after this.


ETA; I am far from arrogant. I'm no beauty queen and you can watch and see the guys going to the hotter chicks first and getting shot down. They work their way down to me eventually, and once I say no there are still other girls below me in the pecking order that they go to and eventually get lucky, hopefully. Usually the really hot guys get snatched up by the really hot girls (no pun intended) but sometimes when there aren't many other girls there, I used to get a chance at them. Even though I've never picked up a guy at a bar, it's nice to be asked. I'm never the hottest girl in the room unless I go to either a sports bar or a prison. At least at the prison their eyes wouldn't be glued to the tv lol!

Last edited by OliveOilMom on 11 May 2013, 12:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I forgot to mention, some of you are hysterical!! !! :D This was such a fun thread to read!

pretty good points there. I break it down.
1- believe it or not, I am not into casual sex unless a woman ( who's not ugly or crazy) ask me for sex.
and I would try to form a relationship or a friendship with her ( Im not that type of guy,
who would have sex with a woman, and leave and dump her)
2-''harder for a women to find love, than sex'' I have to agree with you on this
but what would you rather have, no true love and no sex. or no true love but good amount of sex.
Because there are men and women that has never had sex or true love, so if you can get
still get sex but not a true love, in my book, that not that bad ( that just what I think, everyone
feels different about it)

3-being autism does make it hard for many us to get dates. now there are aspie men who do very well in dating,
but for alot of us we are too eccentric, too shy, too weird, for alot of women to date us.

4-I do agree that pua and most dating advice are obsessed with party girl type but not
the quiet geeky type.

This is really encouraging. Thank you.

On bodybuilding.com, yeah, probably.

I appreciate your candor on the subject, Dantac.

Though, I cannot speak for all women, it seems that women are far less visually focused than men. Like, I don't even register a guy unless he says something interesting, makes me think in a new way, teaches me something new, or does something really nice. To actually think of someone in a beyond friendly way, I would have to see some proven good character, some kind of passion for life or learning... something like that... typically over time. But, I don't check out people. Personality & character are everything. If someone has a fantastic brain & is an honest & very good person, (all the time, not just sometimes), that person is more physically attractive to me (by positive association, maybe? haha) Except, cleanliness is very, very important... & I think this goes for TONS of women. So, even I get put off if someone has no interest in hygiene. I like when someone is physically fit, too, but it's more because I think they have a better chance at living longer & won't complain when I try to eat healthy! haha

There was a guy that was talking to me in a bar where my book club has some extra discussion. He asked me if I thought he was attractive. I said, honestly, "I have absolutely no idea, because I don't even know who you are." The same person had said he thought I was an "8" after not even a few minutes of talking. (This was probably flattery of some sort. He was very clearly on board with the whole PUA thing we've been talking about! lol) It actually didn't take long for me to discern he was VERY unattractive, because he was a huge jerk to me & others & also lied. For these reasons... if I had a scale... he was about a zero on it.

I can't even wrap my head around that... how someone could put me on any kind of scale without knowing me. Like, when you described this girl... I couldn't imagine wanting to be with someone I didn't even like, or finding someone physically attractive who doesn't have good character.

I imagine it must be confusing for many men, to go around with your heart not in things like that. It sounds kind of horrifying, really.

Don't know about other women, but beauty, to me, is inside-out.

If you put a picture of Temple Grandin up or Einstein next to a picture of a young Britney Spears, I would never pick Britney as the most beautiful. Does that make sense to you at all?

Well Moonrise, a guy that I am going to be in a relationship with should have a decent personality. He has to have something personality wise for me to actually be into him, but there has to be physical attraction as well. Sometimes there is only physical attraction. I dated this one guy for months who I was only physically attracted to. I tell you, that boy was hotter than hot. He was honestly TV hot. The hottest guy I have ever dated. AND he rode a motorcycle and was a black belt in Kung Fu. There were two problems. He was very stupid. So stupid in fact that I just wouldn't let him talk around my friends. He was a Jethro Bodine type of stupid. And he also had the smallest penis I've ever seen in my life. The hotness compensated for both of those for a while, but I just couldn't deal with that anymore. For some reason though he was totally in love with me. Even actually slept in a tree in this guys back yard to be near me all summer cause he lived in Leeds and I lived in Bham. Maybe I was one of only a few girls who could get past those other two problems for a little while, I don't know. He had no shortage of women coming up to him and talking, but after talking to him they just didn't stick around. He had been dating this Amazon chick I knew before me, and she was even lower in the pecking order than I was. He broke up with her for me. I hid from her that entire summer cause she could and would have kicked my ass from one end of West End to the other.


ETA; He did take me on some of the best dates I've ever been on. Exploring caves, camping, shooting guns, all kinds of fun stuff like that. Rarely did we do a "normal date" although I did go to his prom with him. In a long, lime green antebellum dress with a train and a bustle. He wore a lime green tux. Don't hate, it was 1981.

1. I am very happy to hear that. I hope you keep in mind that these websites provide effective formulas for having the casual sex that you say you are not seeking, and not for forming a reality-based, healthy kind of relationship. A lot of guys get sucked into this kind of lifestyle even though they have good intentions, but seem to lose their way in life.

(a sidenote about the idea of "ugly" women: I highly recommend the movie Shallow Hal. I think MOST guys I know should see this! haha I do not say you are shallow, of course, because I know your original question could simply be hypothetical. But, it's the name of a movie that considers some concepts that you might want to reconsider for yourself. :) Some guys seem to get almost hypnotized by the kind of women that look like models. They assume these women are awesome... but being a "beauty" according to the current social standards and being a good mate don't go hand in hand proportionally like some men think. In fact, many of these women have NO self-esteem & that's why they put so much time into their appearance. And no self-esteem in a woman can often mean a lot of unnecessary talking, a need for constant reassurance & general drama, arguing, jealousy & instability. If someone spends that much time on appearance, consider what this says about her personality & priorities in life & how these will affect you in the future. A good number of these kinds of women act so nice until they get married & their true colors come out. Some of them are not understanding if their boyfriends/husbands lose a job, for example, because they can no longer get their nails done or they can't afford a BMW, designer clothes, or the personal trainer that helped them get that rockin' bod. More of the women like this are the kind of women who don't understand why I turn down dates, because they say, "you are stupid. You could have had a free meal." Women who are more normal looking usually don't say things like that to me, because they tend to see guys as people instead of as meal tickets or beverage-buyers. I have seen so many inexperienced but fantastic guys fall for this, & it's awfully sad to see them (& their children!) suffer the ramifications of being blinded by someone's attractiveness and fake smiles. In order to not get stuck yourself... you may want to think about things a little & figure out how important beauty really is to you. I'm not saying all beautiful women are that way, but it's shocking how many of them are.)

2. Tough question, but it's a trick question! haha The premise is that you will have no love and no sex if you do not simply have sex. I believe that you are very likely to find love if you look for that & have a healthy attitude about it (which is totally doable. If you can analyze & break things down the way you do, you can analyze & readjust any false premise or perception that could hold you back in this area.) Because I cannot accept the premise that you are completely unlovable, I cannot accept your conclusion that you must choose one or the other. You asked about me. I absolutely choose love. I don't even have to think about it. Sex without love is like a Jackson Pollack painting. Sex with love is like a Botticelli. I don't see a point in sex without love. I'd rather just read or go swim in the ocean or do something that isn't a total waste of time. I can't judge others for finding something worthwhile in something cause, but that's my take. It isn't for me.

3. That is exactly the reason I went to the trouble of writing a detailed response to try to convince you guys not to go to the dark side. :) I do know some Aspie guys have no trouble, but most do seem to. This is because the world is shallow. I have said this before & I'll say it a million times before I die, I bet. Having Asperger's is a litmus test for the people you interact with. It will expose who has good character & intelligence & who doesn't. An NT who is mean to you or judgmental probably wouldn't make a good friend anyway. Let him/her go. Some people will love you for who you are, and these people are good to everybody & the best friends you could hope for & they will enrich your lives in ways you never thought possible. It is the same with women. If a woman won't give you the time of day, because she wants everybody to be cookie-cutters, she isn't worth the time. She'd probably make a rotten girlfriend, to you or whatever NT she ends up with! You are LUCKY to know so quickly what she is made of! So... if you or anyone wants to go out with "a lot of girls," sure, there could be difficulties. A lot of girls aren't smart enough to see why Aspie men are actually super & not weird or crazy. If you are looking for an awesome chick who will love you & also give you the added sweetness of physical intimacy, there are honest & effective strategies for doing that. A good start is to focus, not on the lot of girls that wouldn't date an Aspie, but on the fewer, but more exciting variety that would.

In all seriousness, I do wish Aspies especially as Aspies tend to be literal, would steer clear of PUA sites. You all have a GIGANTIC one-up on NT guys. If you want the real thing, hold onto that thing that makes you special & precious, because after these girls get jerked around by those loser PUAs, they will be so grateful to find someone who isn't trying to manipulate them, someone who is a person & not an act! Most aspie guys are RARE GEMS if they aren't trying to be something they aren't. There are ways to work with this! It's more a matter of being around more people who share your interests rather than a matter of manipulating the people they're around! :)

4. That is true, and is the result of the advice being intended to help you find success with one-night stands instead of helping you to find a real girlfriend. lol Part of the method is to find the dumbest girl possible then inebriate her so she will be even dumber. This is one of the reason it's sad, both for the girl, who is fooled & used & for the guy, who seems to have no pride.

You're welcome! :) It's true.

Your comments are so funny! I do see where some women, more than others, are affected by appearance... Your story reminded me a little of Cyrano de Bergerac... Would you really have not fallen for Cyrano, had you been Roxanne? Would you have let a little ole' nose get in the way... if someone was truly exception in other regards? (serious question)

& is the attraction based on visual appearance or does it also have to do with who someone is & how you interact together?

If this guy had been really horrible to you, would you still have been able to think of him as attractive?

The 80's were pretty special!! ! haha

Party on Moonrise!