men who won't date fat women

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We've been through this conversation, I feel kind of bad dragging you through the mud, but I don't think you or DialAForAwesome are victims anymore than the rest of us are, which seems to be how he feels.

Seconded.

We're not here to fulfill anything for anybody - there is no reason for us to be here other than the reasons we make for ourselves.

We can not assume or expect others to "fill our voids". Relying on others to provide validation for you is like relying on complete strangers for handouts - beggars can not be choosers, and even if they get what they want, they are still beggars.

I don't think Im victim either. I don't know about ''dailAforawesome'' how he feels.

Meems, you don't know anything about me, so kindly stop assuming.

I won't just accept anyone. There are girls who I find attractive physically but wouldn't touch with a ten-foot pole because of how they act. Those types are pretty on the outside, but poison on the inside, as I like to say. Meanwhile, I get rejected all the time for stupid reasons like how I look, or the fact that I don't make much money. All the while I get told I'm manly, good with kids, fun to be around, etc. but a lot of people don't even wanna be my friend. THAT'S where I get frustrated, and say yes, I'm a victim. Anybody in that type of situation, where they can't even win at losing, is a victim, whether male or female. Of course you'll see it differently because people are actually attracted to you. Some of those people happen to be creeps, and for that, I apologize. But for people like me, we wonder if we're completely defective, and it ends up becoming a cycle. This is my reality, and I wish I could find a way to accept it without complaining. But the more frustrated I get, the more I complain about it, even at times when it doesn't bother me that much. Depression, and not being able to take meds for it, doesn't help either. This depression came from not knowing WTF is wrong with me to where I get told how awesome I am, but can't get anything going.

Let me tell you a little about myself, since you obviously don't know me very well, even though we've talked on FB a few times. I'm a guy who can see beauty in a lot of things and people. I don't like to go around calling others ugly, because it's something I've dealt with from the time I was 3 years old. Nobody should have the right to call other people that. Even when I was a more positive person, and didn't quite care about finding love, I still found most women to be beautiful. They just are. It's got nothing to do with trying to win their favor. I'm 25 goddamn years old and don't have a lot of female friends. I'm still not gonna turn around and be like "oh that girl's a b***h" like some members here I won't name (one of whom has a username that starts with "T", hint hint). I've watched ladies struggle through being told they're fat or ugly, and also watched men do the same thing. I try to offer words of encouragement to both sides about it, since it's not fun to deal with at all. If you were any kind of attentive towards anything I've said, you'd know that instead of lashing out like this at me. I don't deserve it. And I don't deserve being called a misogynist or a sexist because I think women's lib is better than feminism, either, but that's for a different time and place to discuss.

Of course I care about making the other person happy. That's what the point of a relationship is. It's just that a lot of women I know are personally blinded and can't see what is in front of them, then complain when they get shafted. Men do this s**t too, and it makes me angry. I don't like how you're putting words into my posts and thoughts that just aren't there. That's why I cooled down on posting on this forum. It's bad enough I gotta deal with people saying one thing and doing another, I gotta deal with the passive-aggressive types who like to see things that just aren't there. So now you're trying to say that I'm a white knight, when my sex drive is so low that I don't even care about it anymore? Maybe I was wrong about you after all, meems. If you don't know who the real white knights are, it's no wonder that men give you so much trouble. Not that you deserve to have trouble with them. You don't. But it sure explains a lot.

It is waaaayyyy more socially acceptable for a woman to say "oh he's cute but he's so short, I couldn't date him" than for a guy to say "she's cute but she's too overweight. I couldn't date her." I see this all the time. This one heavyset obese woman I socialized with a few times once said that "Bruno Mars is cute but too short, he must be like 5'5" or less" right in front of my face and I'm only 5'6". Yeah I'm taller than Bruno Mars but still. Meanwhile if I made a comment about a girl being too fat, I'm sure she would let me have it. It's not socially acceptable to rag on "fat chicks". I also had a co-worker that made fun of a short male co-worker (who was shorter than me but still!). I wonder if they seem to think it's OK to say that in front of me because I'm not as short as those guys but then say that I'm too short to date or make fun of my stature behind my back (I'm not very trusting of people. Can you tell?)

Now if the obese girl was not fat and criticized a guy for being fat, I think she would make people feel very awkward in polite company. Even fat guys are afforded more of a protected status than short guys. But I still think that it's more socially acceptable to make fun of a fat guy (people were laughing at the fat guy in the movie The Internship in the theatre I was at yesterday) over a fat girl.

At the end of the day though, you know what? It is what it is. 20 years ago it was socially acceptable to use the word "fag". And it used to be socially acceptable to make fun of fat chicks. Not anymore. Maybe one day making fun of short people will be taboo. I feel like calling out women for the short guy talk. A black person wouldn't tolerate a white person calling black people n****r. And it would be taboo for a white girl to say she wouldn't date a black guy in front of a black dude. So why should we put up with that? If we call women out on it, they'll just say we have Napoleon Complex. But they should be taken to task for saying that stuff around us. If a short guy lets people walk over him, he's beta. If he sticks up for himself, he has Napoleon Complex.

Last edited by feenie on 09 Jun 2013, 8:59 pm, edited 2 times in total.

you are in the same boat as me brother... I'm not picky about looks at all, but women are sure picky about my looks. Isn't it funny how men are supposedly more shallow than women?

And guess what? Even if you're not picky about looks, to women you are still "shallow" because they think that not caring about looks means you'll take any-old-body. Heads you lose, tails you lose.

EDIT: There's more to love than looks. Personality, for one thing. Just because you might think a lady is beautiful on the outside doesn't mean she'll A. be a perfect match for you or B. even be a good person. But nobody deserves to be ragged on for how they look. Looks are the number one thing that cannot be helped, and I can't stand people who judge others or will not give them a chance based on that. It's disrespectful.

Dude, I agree 100% . I can't even get women to be my friend. Sometimes they pretend to be my friend but only if they need emotional support when their as*hole boyfriends screw them over. You wanna know another thing that sucks? How women can openly vent about their dating problems and call men as*holes but if a man complains about women he is automatically a misogynist. Furthermore people tell us that women sense our misogyny and reject us because of it. Basically society tells us we are responsible for women treating us like crap.

Oh alien, please don't get me started on this. I'd be here all night. I have this problem too. It's like "oh, you're so manly and cool and yada yada, but you're only good enough to talk to about my problems!" It's like they don't know what friendship is. I've had men do this crap to me too, but with their girlfriends instead. Friendship is give and take, not take and take. Yet you can't talk to them or you're suddenly the bad guy. Women are allowed to vent, but men can't even have the slightest complaint or they're spineless or a misogynist. Equality indeed.

Oh alien, please don't get me started on this. I'd be here all night. I have this


problem too. It's like "oh, you're so manly and cool and yada yada, but you're only good enough to talk to about my problems!" It's like they don't know what friendship is. I've had men do this crap to me too, but with their girlfriends instead. Friendship is give and take, not take and take. Yet you can't talk to them or you're suddenly

the bad guy. Women are allowed to

vent, but men can't even have the slightest complaint or they're spineless or a misogynist. Equality indeed.[/
quote]

That's why I refuse to let myself be a doormat for these women.. I actually respect myself now and guess what? Women don't want anything to do with me if I wont agree to be their personal therapist.

wow that sucks for you. I don't even get treat that badly by women, even after I use my pickup lines.
most women won't date me, but very few have ever been totaly rude and mean to me.
so I don't why women treat you bad or dialaforawesome bad.

Being treated badly is a big issue, but I wanna know WHY I'm being treated this way when I try to treat as many people as I can (this means both males and females) with respect.

It also bothers me to get told that I'm practically god's gift to women, but just get treated as an emotional punching bag. I'd be happy if I could even get some more lady friends. I just don't want to be counted out before being given a chance anymore, based on something I can't control when what people say would indicate that the exact opposite should be happening.

Last edited by DialAForAwesome on 09 Jun 2013, 10:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Women don't like talking to me about anything. I'm so alpha I'm alexithymic and don't have emotions.

well most of them aren't openly mean to me, Cold is a better way to put it. Most women are too cowardly to reject a guy properly let alone insult him. Most women lie to me when I ask them out, they'll say yes but always flake or stand me up.

The gals I know aren't cowardly and will either politely tell a guy no so he knows that no is no and it's not happening, or will flat out tell him. I don't know where you are with all those cowardly women but I don't know any.

Southerners are more blunt in some aspects.