Most Aspie men are in over their heads with dating.

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TeaEarlGreyHot
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24 Aug 2010, 12:03 am

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:

me asking if you were an as*hole

Yeah... I can see how that could be confusing. :-|

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TeaEarlGreyHot
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24 Aug 2010, 12:06 am

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:

I've really only seen 'meanness' from him when someone is being an as*hole first. So, perhaps you are one of those as*holes or you need to reevaluate your assessment of Pistonhead.

Your call.

Oh... and right here? Not calling you an as*hole. I'm throwing out possibilities. By saying I called you an as*hole, you are in effect calling yourself one.

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Chronos
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24 Aug 2010, 1:04 am

foreveryoung wrote:

You for thinking that it's easy to keep a woman interested, especially at a young age. Young women or shallow women will dump a man over the stupidest things.

Then don't date young and shallow women.

I wouldn't date a shallow man no matter how physically attractive I thought he was.

TeaEarlGreyHot
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24 Aug 2010, 1:13 am

Chronos wrote:

foreveryoung wrote:

You for thinking that it's easy to keep a woman interested, especially at a young age. Young women or shallow women will dump a man over the stupidest things.

Then don't date young and shallow women.

I wouldn't date a shallow man no matter how physically attractive I thought he was.

That would be too easy!

Does anyone else find it funny that someone with the unsername 'forever young' would have a problem with young people?

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Chronos
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24 Aug 2010, 1:14 am

Apple_in_my_Eye wrote:

Chronos wrote:

Once you are in a relationship, it's fine for you men to be somewhat socially dumb. It's fine to be somewhat unattentive. That's how most men are. Look how many women come on here and say they think their boyfriend or husbands have AS. How many men do you see coming here saying they think their girlfriend or wife has AS?

Or, maybe the conclusion is that it bothers women more. I see a lot of complaints from ASC men & women that socially interacting with NT women is generally more difficult than NT men (which is also my experience).

NT women are more difficult to interact with than NT men on a social, platonic basis. But as far as dating goes, they aren't as socially demanding as men.

You, as men, are allowed to be somewhat aloof in a relationship with an NT woman. I, as a woman, am totally undesirable to an NT man if I'm aloof. It is bad enough women get pegged as b!tches in situations where they are really just being assertive, when a man in the same situation would not be thought nearly as poorly of.

When an NT woman starts dating a guy, she just wants him to show an interest in her...maybe say something clever, be relatively clean and not creepy. There is a thread instructing you on how to avoid being the latter.

If you are a woman with AS you would be hard pressed to find information on how to avoid being creepy and good luck finding a man who you are compatible with and would consider more than having a one night stand with you.

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24 Aug 2010, 1:16 am

I'm shallow! Yes, how odd...he'll hate himself forever!

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Dox47
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24 Aug 2010, 1:42 am

foreveryoung wrote:

Btw, Willard doesn't even have Aspergers. A guy that's a radio DJ at 18 and sleeps with his callers doesn't have AS, plain and simple. Why he thinks he's the spokesperson of the forum is beyond me, and I'm not the only one who thinks this.

So you're a qualified diagnostician now? Over the internet even? Well I'm impressed... :roll:

foreveryoung wrote:

And going on craiglist isn't good advice, sorry. I'm not looking for a fat ethnic woman anyway.

Well, I was going to tell you the right way to meet all types of women online, not just craigslist, but you being such a playa' and all I guess my assistance isn't needed here...

Incidentally, I sought out my ethnic woman specifically, I'd been dating skinny white girls for a few years and decided it was time for a change; guess there's no accounting for taste, huh?

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hale_bopp
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24 Aug 2010, 3:16 am

I stopped reading this thread when it turned into a pile of poo.

You all need to take a good look in the mirror, because thats where the problem lies. Not saying this isn't true for me also but at least I can admit it..

fs
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24 Aug 2010, 3:27 am

hale_bopp wrote:

In many countries, white men, no matter who bad looking or socially they are, are considered the cream of the crop because they come from a rich country.

Thats pretty much what it comes down to. If you can't get a white woman, find someone who does like you. Stop whining and not doing anything.

In spite of being female, hale_bopp has made my favorite post here so far, mostly for "Stop whining and not doing anything.". I agree 100%.

As for why women are attracted to men from rich countries, yes the money of the country has something to do with it. But also men from these countries often have a reputation for being nice-guys. You see women from non-feminist countries are actually attracted to nice-guys while women in feminist countries are mostly attracted to bad-boy thugs.

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katzefrau
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24 Aug 2010, 3:40 am

your signature says it all.

hostility toward women is not attractive. i'm afraid of posting to this thread, lest i get flamed. so that's all i will say.

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fs
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24 Aug 2010, 3:50 am

katzefrau wrote:

your signature says it all.

hostility toward women is not attractive. i'm afraid of posting to this thread, lest i get flamed. so that's all i will say.

I assume this comment is directed at me. I created the No-Girlfriend Forum as a public service for men who lack girlfriends. There are a number forums available for these men but they generally have misguided moderation, and I want these men to be able to discuss ALL options available to them. I personally am happily married. I am not hostile to women generally, only to women from feminist cultures.

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Hector
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24 Aug 2010, 4:04 am

This thread became unreadable from around page the end of page five, so I'll just ignore all that and get to what interests me.

hyperlexian wrote:

AGREED. could someone please start a thread that celebrates aspie success with women? cuz i refuse to believe that no aspie men are ever successful in dating.

This is one of the recurring threads on this part of the forums, especially if you couple it with "can people who had success share their experiences"-type threads. There's usually a bit less in the way of responses than one would think, at least in recent times. Yet in the Adult Autism Issues forum, most of the polled men had some experience in a sexual relationship. I'd say that most of those guys just ignore Love and Dating.

Dox47 wrote:

You know, I started a thread like that a while back, I got flamed to a crisp by some regulars in this forum who though I was "taunting them with what they couldn't have"...

Coincidentally that was about the same time I posted my online dating guide, it got a similar response and a lot of hate directed my way.

Your Craigslist guide was interesting and informative. I didn't chip in because I still never used it, and don't have any plans in the immediate future to use it (being in a foreign country at the moment). Do not regard the replies as an exhaustive reflection of how your advice has been received.

fs wrote:

I am not hostile to women generally, only to women from feminist cultures.

Not what I'd call a wise judgment. Hostility won't get you far.

fs
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24 Aug 2010, 4:12 am

Hector wrote:

fs wrote:

I am not hostile to women generally, only to women from feminist cultures.

Not what I'd call a wise judgment. Hostility won't get you far.

But I don't want anything from women from feminist cultures, so why is it unwise? Do you think it would be wrong for a Jew to feel hostility to Nazis? What is the difference between this and me feeling hostility to Feminists.

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katzefrau
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24 Aug 2010, 4:14 am

Hector wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

AGREED. could someone please start a thread that celebrates aspie success with women? cuz i refuse to believe that no aspie men are ever successful in dating.

i just started a "success stories please" post over in in-depth adult forum.

the focus over here seems too much about sex and bitterness. i want to hear something real.

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Chronos
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24 Aug 2010, 4:15 am

fs wrote:

katzefrau wrote:

your signature says it all.

hostility toward women is not attractive. i'm afraid of posting to this thread, lest i get flamed. so that's all i will say.

I consider being called "worthless" and the people I love being called "worthless" hostility.
You do not help men with AS. You make life more difficult for them by destroying their self confidence and preventing them from approaching a woman who may very well say yes to them and you demonize and slander the character of women in the process by propagating your convoluted views. I am a woman with AS and let me tell you, the dating world is no more kind to us than it is to the men with AS.

This is a place where people with AS can find support. It should not be a place where I am told I am worthless and painted as something I am not.

I am a human being, and I am a woman, and I care about men, and I care about men with AS, which is why I have written so much to try to help them. You see, men with AS and women with AS have to deal with different sides of the same coin when it comes to dating, but when it comes to lonliness, and the horrible feeling that you will never find someone with whom you have mutual compatibility, it's the same side of the same coin. I doubt you have AS and I doubt you understand that.

I don't come here to be called worthless.

So I think I will not come here anymore.

fs
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24 Aug 2010, 4:26 am

Chronos wrote:

I don't come here to be called worthless.

So I think I will not come here anymore.

From prior experience, I know how this will play out. The moderators here will side with you (known as white knighting) and moderate me. This is fine, of course. This is why I created the No-Girlfriend Forum, so that there exists a place where men can speak freely. I did look on this forum for a pinned thread with forum policies, but I didn't see one. If the moderators here have a forum policy, I will be glad to adhere to it.

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