WHAT ARE YOUR DEAL BREAKERS WHEN IT COMES TO RELATIONSHIPS?

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Factory Ten
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17 Jul 2015, 3:34 pm

DemocraticSocialistHun: I won't speak for the OP, the people you seem intent on insulting, or anyone other than myself. So on that note, I don't think your thinly veiled personal attacks and attempt to turn this thread into political discussion are necessary or appropriate. WrongPlanet has a subforum called "Politics, Philosophy, and Religion'' where your opinions and convictions would probably be better suited.



The_Face_of_Boo
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17 Jul 2015, 4:30 pm

Factory Ten wrote:
I'm going to add to my deal breakers with this:

- Bidets.

Upon learning about them, they sound disgusting.


It's those who don't wash their ass are being disgusting :P



Factory Ten
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17 Jul 2015, 4:53 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Factory Ten wrote:
I'm going to add to my deal breakers with this:

- Bidets.

Upon learning about them, they sound disgusting.


It's those who don't wash their ass are being disgusting :P


I wash it in the shower, thank you very much. :lol:



The_Face_of_Boo
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17 Jul 2015, 5:12 pm

Factory Ten wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Factory Ten wrote:
I'm going to add to my deal breakers with this:

- Bidets.

Upon learning about them, they sound disgusting.


It's those who don't wash their ass are being disgusting :P


I wash it in the shower, thank you very much. :lol:


It's not enough, I highly doubt that you take a shower directly after every toilet use.



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18 Jul 2015, 11:37 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Believe it or not, there are people who would fulfill the desires you presented here.


idk lots of aspies are lonely, so don;t like being alone. though suppose some alone time is nice, but I've had way way way way too much of it for a lifetime.



cathylynn
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19 Jul 2015, 12:00 am

yaskfls wrote:
Nobody wants an abusive relationship. The problem is that abusive people (cluster B personalities like narcissists,psycopaths etc.) do not present as abusive. They will act as your new best friend and soulmate.
I think that AS people might be more at risk to end up with these people, because we have difficulties reading other people. Please do read up on the warning signs of abusive people e.g. here https://www.psychopathfree.com/content. ... -Red-Flags

Been there done that, for far to many years.

Now what I want is somebody with empathy, openminded, who cares for other people, who likes children and a good laugh, able to be alone (narcissists cant stand being alone) and have his own interests. He must also be a little bittle weird otherwise he would not be able to appreciat me :)
Well now, that was actually a positive list!

amen. i was engaged to a sociopath. he was charming, but after we were engaged he hit me, so i broke up with him. so that's a deal-breaker along with any sort of addiction. i would also have a very hard time with a right-winger.



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19 Jul 2015, 2:05 am

I'm gonna just list the things I am looking for:

She must be loving, giving, and caring
She must be respectful
Honesty
Loyalty
Integrity
She makes me a priority
She must not be totally crazy, or have any other issues that cause me a lot of problems.
I must be able to have a decent conversation with her
She can think for herself, and make her own decisions
She shares similar interests, and outlook on life.
No drugs
She must have a job, or some way to support herself.



The_Face_of_Boo
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19 Jul 2015, 5:06 am

nurseangela wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
But this is not how we use toilet paper for cleaning after poop LOL ...we don't apply water on the toilet paper or paper towels, except for guys washing the penis'urethra after peeing, which requires little water.

Water (and soap if necessary) is applied directly on the butt or genitals - toilet paper is also used for wiping (after washing) and then drying - I believe we consume toilet paper way more.
In the Levant, the bidet (which is a french invention yet not so common in France, ironcially) is the most common tool for that, it is also very common in Italy; next comes the small hand shower placed next to the seat which is common in other Arab countries.

Filipinos even use special kinds of bucket, Filipinos have a very hygienic culture btw, and I think most Asian communities apply something similar.
Bidet in my opinion is the best choice because no risk that its shower accidentally touches the anus.

It is a BASIC hygiene lesson that is part of the toilet training we do to our kids - little girls especially are trained how to properly wipe after washing without risking to contaminate their urethra (ie. never from back to front).

And I find it so appalling that all this is completely missing in the brit cultures.


My concern is that the bidet water is not clean enough. Toilet water is swimming with bacteria like Ecoli. If that water were to enter the urethra (sounds pretty possible to me) then a UTI would be started. Wipes or toilet paper would be more sanitary.


Another silly brit misconception about bidets.

It is the same sink water you use to wash your hands and to brush your teeth - why the bidet would be full of Ecoli?

Of course, like any other bathroom equipment, one needs to clean it all the time, and if your bidet's water has Ecoli, then so your sink's water.

And yes, women in the world use them during periods, they use it to clean their menstrual blood and never heard of Ecoli infections.


Take a look at that:

Quote:
Bidets are environmentally friendly and cost-efficient—and both of those labels are popular with American consumers. So why aren’t bidets more popular in the States?

According to sociologist Harvey Molotoch, author of Toilet: Public Restrooms and the Politics of Sharing, we got off on the wrong foot with bidets and just never recovered. He says we owe our overall aversion to bidets to our country’s forefathers: The British associated bidets with French prostitutes, and consequently thumbed their noses at their use. Over time, it became a habit to wipe instead of wash after using the bathroom, and it never went away.

https://www.yahoo.com/health/bidets-are ... 49767.html


And this:

Quote:
But marketing issues aside, urologist David M. Kaufman, MD, says using a bidet just might be healthier for us: “It’s definitely preferable to toilet paper” — for women, at least. While the wash basin has “little value” for healthy men, he says bidet use can have a big impact on the urinary health of women.

Here’s why: Bacteria, which are the source of urinary tract infections, are found within the vagina. Toilet paper only cleans the outside of the vagina, not the inside. “It is only through thorough irrigation with a bidet or hand-held shower stream that these bacteria can be washed out,” he says.


Seriously, Americans and Brits, it's time for you to adopt this civilized way of ass/genitals-cleaning. :lol: :roll: :roll: And stop with the stupid excuses.



Factory Ten
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19 Jul 2015, 12:30 pm

NEVER! To arms! To arms! The bidets are coming! The bidets are coming! To arms!



The_Face_of_Boo
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19 Jul 2015, 1:22 pm

I should be a bidet preacher.

The bidet is your savior! Your ticket to cleanliness! Hail for the great bidet!!

Embrace the bidet, you toilet-wise primitives! :lol:

Image



Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 19 Jul 2015, 1:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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19 Jul 2015, 1:24 pm

The Bidets in Japan can play music!

Image



tombo12boar
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19 Jul 2015, 2:21 pm

another red flag for me. That drugged, dead- eyed look of dopey aggression - the Britanny Murphy/Courtney Love/ Lana Del Rey/Chloe Sevigny look.



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19 Jul 2015, 2:27 pm

Thinking of what have been - or should have been - deal-breakers in the past:

Involved with someone else and wants to cheat on them with me

Threatens to commit suicide if we split up, very soon after we meet

Addiction problems, especially prescription, for instance passes out in my car after taking some pills

Has a Jekyll-Hyde personality

Has crazy-dangerous relatives hanging around (one ex's father was a Charles Manson follower)

Obsessed with a celebrity or similar figure, to the point of being delusional about them

Hits me or threatens to hit me

Has a vindictive streak and likes to take revenge on people or "prank" people

Constantly argues and/or finds fault with other people

Tends to polarize other people into taking sides for or against them in all matters

Acts very inconsiderate with "people who don't matter" (their words, not mine) like store clerks or waiters, or obviously disabled people

When driving, won't stop anywhere to let me eat or use the restroom, and/or acts really impatient and resentful about it when we finally do stop

Insults or ridicules me then says it was a "joke"

Puts down my beliefs, interests, taste in music, clothing, etc.

Puts pressure on me to quit my job, change my hair color, etc.

Doesn't like cats, doesn't like MY cats, or my cats don't like him

Has a disdainful attitude towards Southerners, Southern accents, country folk, hillbillies, etc.

Vegetarian or vegan - I respect that, but my diet is largely meat, and that is one difference that is very hard to reconcile.

And most importantly...
Brainwashed by anyone (government, media, religion, family, an ex, whoever) to the point of being unable to question or disagree with what they have been told.



Other highly probable dealbreakers for me:

Smokes or chews tobacco

Does drugs, other than occasional MJ

Drinks to the point of getting a buzz or getting drunk

Doesn't bathe at least once a day

Doesn't have an appreciation for classical music, foreign films or art films



Absolutely certain dealbreakers:

Wants children

Wants a poly relationship, or doesn't believe in monogamy

Doesn't have, doesn't understand, or doesn't believe in psychic experiences



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19 Jul 2015, 2:32 pm

I don't understand why they hate the bidet so much. It's just water, and it is good. I don't get how using paper can be considered a much more civil thing.

tombo12boar wrote:
another red flag for me. That drugged, dead- eyed look of dopey aggression - the Britanny Murphy/Courtney Love/ Lana Del Rey/Chloe Sevigny look.

Do you mean the crazy eyes? https://vimeo.com/21454144



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19 Jul 2015, 2:46 pm

yaskfls wrote:
Nobody wants an abusive relationship. The problem is that abusive people (cluster B personalities like narcissists,psycopaths etc.) do not present as abusive. They will act as your new best friend and soulmate.
I think that AS people might be more at risk to end up with these people, because we have difficulties reading other people. Please do read up on the warning signs of abusive people e.g. here https://www.psychopathfree.com/content. ... -Red-Flags

Been there done that, for far to many years.


I agree, and this is a good list.

I seem to be especially vulnerable to the kinds of things on that list. I am probably better off just staying single because of it.



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19 Jul 2015, 4:22 pm

dianthus wrote:
Thinking of what have been - or should have been - deal-breakers in the past:

Involved with someone else and wants to cheat on them with me

Threatens to commit suicide if we split up, very soon after we meet

Addiction problems, especially prescription, for instance passes out in my car after taking some pills

Has a Jekyll-Hyde personality

Has crazy-dangerous relatives hanging around (one ex's father was a Charles Manson follower)

Obsessed with a celebrity or similar figure, to the point of being delusional about them

Hits me or threatens to hit me

Has a vindictive streak and likes to take revenge on people or "prank" people

Constantly argues and/or finds fault with other people

Tends to polarize other people into taking sides for or against them in all matters

Acts very inconsiderate with "people who don't matter" (their words, not mine) like store clerks or waiters, or obviously disabled people

When driving, won't stop anywhere to let me eat or use the restroom, and/or acts really impatient and resentful about it when we finally do stop

Insults or ridicules me then says it was a "joke"

Puts down my beliefs, interests, taste in music, clothing, etc.

Puts pressure on me to quit my job, change my hair color, etc.

Doesn't like cats, doesn't like MY cats, or my cats don't like him

Has a disdainful attitude towards Southerners, Southern accents, country folk, hillbillies, etc.

Vegetarian or vegan - I respect that, but my diet is largely meat, and that is one difference that is very hard to reconcile.

And most importantly...
Brainwashed by anyone (government, media, religion, family, an ex, whoever) to the point of being unable to question or disagree with what they have been told.



Other highly probable dealbreakers for me:

Smokes or chews tobacco

Does drugs, other than occasional MJ

Drinks to the point of getting a buzz or getting drunk

Doesn't bathe at least once a day

Doesn't have an appreciation for classical music, foreign films or art films



Absolutely certain dealbreakers:

Wants children

Wants a poly relationship, or doesn't believe in monogamy

Doesn't have, doesn't understand, or doesn't believe in psychic experiences



And here I thought I was picky. :D

I agree with you on most of those things, though I do like to joke around and tease people, but it's all in good fun. There are some lines that you shouldn't cross though. As far as stopping to use the restroom goes, I had an ex that drank way too much coffee, etc, and then had to stop and pee every 5 min when we were on the road, so it can get pretty frustrating at times. I don't think it was right to totally not stop at all though.