Some questions for Incels after the Toronto van attack

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Excuse me?

I never said any such thing. Why do you think it’s acceptable to misquote me like that?

Several people have told you in a handful of threads in the last few days that this thread is about violent, rape & murder promoting self labeled “incels,” not single lonely men. It was even spelled out crystal clear earlier in this thread that incel = incel movement angry murderous rapist types, not lonely single men. And the post you rented about was also VERY CLEARLY about incels, not lonely single men, so your rant about someone getting away with a double standard in rules and being deserving of a warning or a ban is completely baseless. In fact, it was quite a rude and inappropriate attack on the woman who wrote it and you owe her an apology, IMO.

So involuntary single =/= incel?

and let Incel refers to the "movement" only?

That is precisely what was discussed and agreed to several pages ago in this thread and a part of sly's reading comprehension difficulties.

Doesn’t “incel” stand for “involuntary celibate “, rather than involuntarily single? That is, not having sex, but not by choice? If you are married and your spouse is ill, you may be celibate and it might not be voluntary.

You can be involuntarily single but not celibate- not having a steady partner, and wanting one, but perhaps having one-night stands. Not an Incel.

You can be voluntarily single and have lots of sex. Goldfish you sound like a good example of voluntarily single, but having sex.

In the first example, the person could technically be called an incel, but by common definition they are not. “Incel”, as stated in posts above, are the deeply angry and hate filled people, who think they are entitled to sex without condition. Single men or women, lonely or content with being single are not Incels. People, including married people, who want sex, who feel that they are entitled to sex, but aren’t getting any and angrily blame others for that condition are Incels.

Yep....that's what it means: "involuntarily celibate." One could be of any "social status.'

"Incel" has come to denote a shortened version of "involuntarily celibate."

However, most people who are "involuntarily celibate" are not "incels" in the sense that they are people on a certain website who profess really screwy opinions.

I hope people stop using "incel" to mean "any involuntarily celibate person."

I agree with you Kraftie. I’ve been married a long time and for health reasons my husband and I were celibate when we would rather have not been, but I would never consider us as “Incels “.

Yes-ish. Yes, it's my choice to decline offers to date people I'm not interested in & it's never been a mutual feeling thing. It's my choice to acknowledge the way that I am and choose not to burden someone else with it. But it wasn't my choice to be born the way I am and feel unsuitable to be in a relationship. So, yes-ish.

But you're right.. bright side, bright side, at least I get laid.. and almost whenever I want. And often with people out of my league. So, that part of life is quite fulfilling. At least there's that & I may as well take what I can get and all that good stuff.

Sorry for misunderstanding. I guess I assumed that it was for the feeling of freedom, rather than feeling unsuitable. You never know, I’ve managed to maintain a 26 year marriage! Ups and downs, but overall good.

I've been quite transparent about it all here on the forums.

1.) It's never been mutual. The very few people I'd have been interested in a relationship with were not equally interested in me. The many that have wanted to start a relationship with me I haven't been interested in.

2.) Like I've said many times: I couldn't live with myself burdening someone else with the way that I am. It's not in me to bring someone else down. I'd rather keep to myself and know that I haven't ruined someone else' life with my flaws & shortcomings due to AS.

Maybe all of this is meant to be so that I can pursue solo pursuits to the nth degree while others are distracted by personal relationships and all the time occupying things that come with them? I like to think of it that way. It's much healthier, IMO, to see the silver lining & realize that all of this creates the opportunity for me to return to University studies and push myself beyond any limitations I believe I have in order to utilize my God given strengths in service to society in the highest possible capacity I can manage. Everything happens for a reason - even my unsuitability as a partner. If I dwelled on it in sadness or anger I would simply be wasting time and achieving nothing, so, I choose not to. Instead, I choose to believe it's a part of who I am for a reason, and that I'm meant to do these other things in life. At least I am liked & loved by many friends and family and am not completely lacking love in my life. I give my love freely to all the little ones in my life, and them in return. I'd drive 100 miles to share a *hug* with any of those kids vs. go on a first date with someone I have no connection with. Life is okay, I maintain a decent balance even without ever having a relationship to date or likely ever in the future. I'm 35 years old, I've had plenty of time to figure these things out, accept them, and learn what I value and don't, and how to go about having a fulfilled life with a happy heart.

This makes you look really bored.

The "incel community" is what, 40,000 members strong? In a country that has over three-hundred million people.

You statistically are in greater danger of violence due to handsome, socially-accepted men who have sex with women all the time.

If the "incel movement" is even real (and not just some boogie man concocted by drama queens on the Internet) then it's mostly just a bunch of depressed guys being gas-lighted by other depressed guys with a silly ideology.

The wiki article I read on Incels says that Incels are heterosexuals and that the first Incel, a woman named Alana, stopped being an incel when she realized she was gay.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incel

Maybe the solution to this problem is that all these men become gay, and then they won't be Incels anymore? [sarcasm]

Seriously looks like an Internet- boogie man that some people created to push an agenda.

You have more to fear from a cute, hot guy that has sex with women all the time - than the guy with social-anxiety disorder stuck in his basement.

The cute hot guys who have sex with women all the time, are much more prone to violence and have committed far more attacks on women than any "Incel".

While there are more nice guys than there are incels on a forum.. the concern is if those incels become radicalized and follow through with copycat rapes & murders. A population of 40,000 determined rapists and murderers could do a lot of damage to others IF they all decide to play out their crazy violent fantasies and do what this van driving murderer did.

Hopefully more of this crap doesn't happen. But it has happened and there's cause for concern. Also, as has been discussed in this thread.. there's no easy solution to any of this. Women are not blow up sex dolls for anyone else to decide who gets to have sex with them, so there will be no "redistribution of sex," or any other such nonsense. So, there very well could be more of this sort of "terrorism," as well as vigilante justice going the other way. Time will tell what, if anything, happens.

You mean protective Beta males, largely.

There are plenty of lonely men who are strong and intelligent - and plenty of women who are dated, that have brothers who are comparably dumb and weak.

One of the main reasons the existence of Evolution is doubtful, is because most women do not choose partners who are nurturing and intelligent or strong - they usually choose the opposite - which directly opposes Darwin's theories (though I don't feel like having a debate with religious-evolutionists)

Again, it looks like the "Incel movement" is a very small group of lonely people who have been turned into an Internet-boogie man by people with an agenda. (Or just bored people)

If for whatever reason the Beta male brothers of women decided to target lonely men they view as "Incels" who are in many cases, Alpha males, then those Beta male brothers would also experience what they wish to inflict on their enemies.

Violence is a double-edged sword - if you seek to exterminate someone - they could exterminate you as well.

- There is no huge movement of "crazed Incels" and there never will be one.

There has been a huge movement of attractive, socially-accepted men committing rape and murder, though.

I know some people won't like my answer, but it's more realistic.

There is a much larger population of attractive, socially-accepted men who have sex with women all the time who copycat each other with rapes and murders against women - and have been doing it for decades.

Attractive, socially-accepted men who have sex with women all the time, already treat women like blow up sex dolls and use women like objects.

Have you seen any college frat-house for example?

No Incels there - but lots of attractive, socially-accepted men raping women - by the thousands - for decades.

Outside of WP and one other internet forum I've not heard of the word 'Incel' and also not very much about male virgins murdering women or any mass hysteria about this happening. I can't say what media portrays in the USA but where I life this is not a mayor topic and not a mayor danger to each individual woman.
As of now I think the men on this forum who indicated that they might be persecuted for being virgins and might be seen as a potential threat solely based on being virgins are overreacting, just as is any woman who fears being murdered by a frustrated male virgin. As of now, while it is tragic if it happens, neither is likely to happen.
I don't agree that one individual handsome socially accepted man is more dangerous than one individual radical incel but as there are more socially accepted successful men than radical incels, an individual woman is more likely to be murdered by a handsome man than by a radical incel.

Don't want someone to reply to something, then don't bring something up that is completely off topic.

You can find an infinite number of reasons why something is doubtful if you decide what the other side thinks instead of asking them or if your observations are flawed.

Do you seriously think that women prefer ugly over handsome, prefer physically weak over physically strong, prefer violent outbursts and a complete lack of self-control over emotional stability or anxiety issues over emotional stability, prefer ill over healthy, prefer bad social skills over good social skills, prefer nervous and indecisive over being able to make up his mind and so on? You must be living in a strange kind of subculture if that's the case because I've never met a woman who prefers all those things.
Are there some women who make stupid mate-choices? Sure, but evolution theory does not predict perfection but variance and mistakes and it does not predict perfect adaptation to our current culture, especially if the lives of our grandparents and all generations before them were totally different to our own.
Also, not all women can attract all men and there's no infinite supply of 'perfect' men such that every woman could choose such a man.

I don't feel like having a debate either though, especially as I may be too busy to be on WP every day. No need to reply and I may not either.

While I don’t agree with your view on evolution, you are making a good point here.