Why many women dislike socially awkward men

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I do.

But it's also related to social dynamics; I can be very confident while playing the heel/gadfly/etc regardless of where I am in terms of up or down.

Hi there, thanks for sharing your thoughts and experiences. I appreciate your interest in socio-anthropological psychology and your perspective on how some people with Asperger's syndrome may feel left out of the "privilege" that others enjoy. However, I want to gently point out a few problematic preconceptions in your thinking.

Firstly, it's important to recognize that not all women have a compulsion to "fix" their partner, and even if they do, it's not necessarily because of an ailment like aggression or narcissism. It's unfair to assume that a woman's desire to help her partner improve is rooted in negative qualities on his part.

Secondly, it's concerning to suggest that a person with Asperger's syndrome wouldn't be considered a good protector or provider based solely on their condition. While it's true that our evolutionary history has shaped certain modes of behavior, it's also important to recognize that modern society values a wide range of skills and qualities beyond traditional hunter-gatherer roles.

Lastly, I want to highlight the problematic nature of the comment you found about socially awkward men. It's unfair to assume that all men who struggle with social situations are deliberately ignoring boundaries, and to suggest that women are socially conditioned to not give a hard no is dismissive of their agency and autonomy. It's important to respect people's boundaries and communicate openly and honestly, regardless of social status or background.

ya, men are the only gender that have to get social akwwardness or social ineptness overcome, handled, if they want to have a dating life or have love in their life

Ummm…no.

I'm not sure that's true. I've seen women who were too awkward to successfully pursue partners or maintain interest from people who had been pursuing.

The latter tends to cause them to become more active and the former means they're in the same boat as awkward guys.

All except for the awkward guys don't want to acknowledge their existence.

I've dated some women like that, I've also not dated some women like that.

There are thousands (perhaps hundreds of thousands) of pages dedicated to this issue on WP and it frustrates me, Beyond counselling individuals experiencing negative experiences with dating there is little in the way of solutions offered.

You can't hide/conceal social awkwardness forever. As with all social experiences it's a skill one has to master over time, You have to be prepared to make mistakes. And that can only comes (as with any other skills) with practice/exposure

From what I observe (and I say this with trepidation knowing my observations are not taken seriously) one can bolster their confidence if they have something else to offer as a "trade" in the dating game. I have seen social awkward NT men who carry in-demand skills which bring with them the capacity to be providers that can compensate for their social awkwardness. But this comes with a price. Dating outside of family/social networks has become driven by market forces and compromise is necessary. An average socially awkward male may need to adjust their expectations. But I will stop there as I know this advice is a path to thread locking.

well it makes sense as to why social ineptness, social awkwardness, won't hurt womens chances of getting into a relationship, than the other way around, since women don't have to do the pursuing

Actually, it can be very difficult for all genders.

Those factors do harm women's chances though.

Both because it's not as though women never pursue but also because being pursued doesn't mean much if everyone who finally gets close enough decides this quarry wasn't what the pursuer had assumed it to be.

Don't be one of those guys who ignores what women actually say because what you feel is true doesn't align with what they describe.

Threads like this end up being locked because some portion of the guys here insist on telling the women here that their experiences don't count because reasons.

well a large portion of autistic men, or even NT men in general, end up reaching their later 20s, even 30s and older and have never had a girlfriend before, however, you don't really hear of women reaching ages like that and still being single, never having had a boyfriend before.

We've had people describe being in that exact situation, actually.

I ended up getting married, but it was a very abusive situation. Many autistic women (and men) end up in a situation like this. It would've been better for me to stay single...by far. Abusers prey on people they perceive as being vulnerable in some way.

It's not that I dislike socially awkward women, I dislike dating women who don't even try to overcome their shyness. One of my tests is willingness to meet my family. If the woman I'm seeing doesn't want to meet my uncles and aunts then she has a social deficit she is not making an effort to overcome. My partner passed this test with flying colours. When I suggested she attend a family birthday she responded enthusiastically.

For similar reasons I dislike dating unemployed women. I don't want to have a partner that will be a social or financial burden on me.

I can say this much: I am an attractive (but socially awkward) guy.

I've seen guys with much worse looks (but without social awkwardness) have a lot more luck than me with attracting a partner.

Men don't have to do the pursuing, even if it's the societal norm. I've had a richer sexual / relationship life than most, and I've never been the pursuer. I'm just no good at making the first move.

well no doubt it about, the vast majority of people in the world who reach 30+ years of age and have never dated, never been in a relationship before, are male