For me...Getting a GF=motivation

Post Reply New Topic

Abso-damn-lutely

Inspiration is not wired into all of us, some people are naturally bubbly, energetic, outgoing and all that kind of stuff.
I am not, I require motivational input, whether it be a person, place or thing, none will suffice for any length of time.
I have to be inspired, boot up the butt, however you want to name it, but it is not a naturally occurring element within me.
Once my fuse is lit, then look out, sparks will fly, beautiful colors of smoke trails will form and I will soar through the unknown, but never alone.
I can do for others, what I can't do for myself it seems, and at times I wonder if I care for others more than myself. However that is a different topic completely.
Point being, you must be interested to be interesting, as far as intimacy is concerned, you have to be interesting, before they will be interested, there is no secret code here.
Do what you enjoy, and they will find you enjoyable, yes of course there will be that occasional person who comes along and tries to fix what is obviously broken, but you both will soon learn, it's impossible futility.

Check out this thread, http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt104675.html
lets see if anyone can relate,
perhaps someone in this very thread

No, that point is very relevant to this thread... Personally, I'm the same way, and I'm pretty sure it has an impact on some of the other comments I have made here... I also have an ingrained need to care for others more than myself (in another context, people would say I would make a wonderful father)... Point is, without the proper stimulus, my mind and body begin to just shut down and I fall into despair... I fear that if I go long enough without, they will eventually atrophy to the point that I won't even be able to do the thing that brings happiness into my life anymore...

Same here, and what I have found is that I can be Inspired, Influenced, Motivated or whatever you want to label it, by virtually anyone, or anything. Sometimes I will turn things around that usually offends me, and find something in common with the Jerk or the Jerks that I disagree with. It's all about positive perception, If I feed the Good Dog, he will mind, if I feed the Bad Dog, I will get Bit. Regardless of whom in this world, there is something we will have in common, IF I look for it. Bin Ladden has a bad liver, me too, we could talk about that, George Bush get's made fun of , we could talk about that, and so on. If I focus on the fact that they are both Complete Idiots, then that makes me feel like an idiot deep inside.

A woman, can Not Fix me, been there, tried That. She firmly believed the line "I Love You..Now Change". Truth is, if she loved be too begin with, then she is not going to like the different me.
Mom's are great to have, but they all have the built in desire to be firmly attached at first, then the natural instinct to cut the umbilical kicks in. After that, they still love the same, but require their own freedom to be equal with their love for the child. For this reason, a mother figure as a GF or Wife, can never accommodate both parties permanently.

Helping others is a great motivator, sad thing is, not everybody believes they need the help that we Know they need.

I have cut this short, and go to work.

Finding a girlfriend is an unrealistic goal for some of us, therefore we shouldn't rely on having one for motivation. And it would seem that most couples don't do a terribly good job of motivating each other anyway...

Needing someone els to get motivated has to be the most backward selfishness ever (:lol:), still, I'm the same way, I spend hours drawing pictures to girls I liked (28 hours on one pic is the record. ), but can't do it when I don't have anyone to do it for. (It don't have to be girls though. ^^) As long as someone asks me to do anything (really asks) I'll say yes basicly whatever it is as long as it don't break my principles, as long as it's someone I care about.

Want to get motivated, in great shape, and permanently off of the soul-draining and time wasting video game / anime addiction in no time?

Simple solution: Join the military.

Trust me, they will get you off your ass, out of the house, and more busy / motivated than you've ever been in your life in no time.

Don't want to get deployed overseas? Join the Coast Guard. They'll still do it for you.

I know a kid that was chubby, geeky, and obsessed with video games and Dungeons & Dragons well through his teenage years, up until the point when he was about 21 years old. Until then, no girl ever gave him the time of day or even a passing glance, and he was constantly rejected by every girl he hit on, mainly because of his extremely passive / non-resistant personality combined with the fact that he was socially awkward and very very shy around people he wasn't already acquainted with (especially girls).

He constantly bemoaned the fact that he was a virgin, and that he had absolutley zero experience with the opposite sex, because no girl would ever pay attention to him in a romantic way, and the girls he actually DID hang out with only treated him as a shoulder to cry on when they were cheated on by their more dominant / attractive boyfriends. More or less, a perpetual "friend zoner", as they say.

Long story short: He joined the U.S. Marine Corps at 21 after he decided that his life was more or less going nowhere, and now has been with more attractive girls than almost any other kid I know - mainly because of the fact that he now looks like he's sculpted out of iron, after a year-after-year regiment of running, drilling, boxing, and lifting weights every day. It also gave him a massive dose of confidence and natural leadership that he never had even a drop off before, and is probably now one of the toughest kids I know. Last I saw him, he finished serving his 4 years of active duty and is now back home with his own apartment, a great job, and a very attractive girlfriend. This is the same kid that just a few years ago spent every weekend sitting in his mother's basement by himself all night playing World of Warcraft and eating bags of cheetos. He now spends his free time on weekend nights cruising around on a Harley-Davidson motorcycle with his girlfriend sitting behind him on the bike.

I'm sure there are other viable options as well, but that one in particular definitely seemed to work the fastest and had the most dramatic change I've ever seen in transforming a nerdy kid into a strong, assertive man that women suddenly seemed to find very attractive.

Btw, did this guy even read any of our responses? Seems like maybe he's ADDing/short attention spanning this thread as well.

Cmon guy -- finish at least one thing you start!

The military is a challenge to ADD types, you have to remember basic instructions. It helps if you don't worry about the Drill Sergeant/Instructor's feelings, just address them the way they want to be addressed and agree to do what they tell you, it's the kind of place that'll keep giving you chances.

6 years ago I was taking major crap from drill sergeants. I had few places to pull back from people, so I hit the gym like no other. Sure I don't have fun with videogames anymore, but I get tons of attention whenever I take my s**t off. You think I sound like an a-hole yet? It's just a normal phase guys go through, you're either gonna be an a-hole because you're pissed at the failed relationships, or you can be an a-hole because you don't know any better. Guess who gets to teach you better, the kind of girl who likes the jerk/a-hole.