please stop these "any girls out there" threads

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12 Aug 2009, 4:11 pm

I vote Republican because I am opposed to high taxes, and universal health care (because I have heard that it is inefficient, and that people sometimes have to wait a year for certain surgeries).

As for Christianity, I am a Lutheran. We ordain women as pastors, and recently allowed GLBT people to be ordained as well.

I am tolerant of all races and genders and religions and sexual orientations. I am just going on what works for me and what has worked in the past.

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Saspie
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12 Aug 2009, 6:36 pm

Tim_Tex wrote:

I did meet someone with the above characteristics, but she turned me down because of the distance (and she just lived in another part of Texas). I tried to reason with her, but she wouldn't listen or compromise, and insisted on having everything her way all the time. She eventually ran off with someone else and refuses to even be my friend anymore.

No wonder she would not listen or compromise if you tried to "reason" with her to convince her to be with you. If someone does not want to be with you there is nothing you can do about it and further attempts to get them to be with you are very very uncomfortable and irritating (I've been in her situation a number of times before). When it comes to picking who you are in a relationship with, it is reasonable to expect someone wants it their way, not your way. I would have also cut ties if someone had done what you had done, because I would find it very disturbing that someone did not respect my "No" answer.

Quote:

I vote Republican because I am opposed to high taxes, and universal health care (because I have heard that it is inefficient, and that people sometimes have to wait a year for certain surgeries).

Well the US government spends more per capita (double, I believe) on health care than the government of the country I live in and I have universal health care. I am very pro free-market economics but for various reasons health care can never be a competitive market and therefore warrants government intervention. But I guess that is a topic for another thread :wink:

Tim_Tex
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12 Aug 2009, 6:52 pm

Saspie wrote:

Tim_Tex wrote:

Quote:

I vote Republican because I am opposed to high taxes, and universal health care (because I have heard that it is inefficient, and that people sometimes have to wait a year for certain surgeries).

I didn't mean it with the intent of pressuring her, and if I was pressuring, I didn't mean it in that way. I didn't try to reason with her until after she mentioned all the non-negotiable requirements she had (which it turned out I actually *did* have).

She also used weird terminology that I had never heard of, and I didn't know what she meant by them, so how could I have known what she was talking about?

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Last edited by Tim_Tex on 12 Aug 2009, 7:04 pm, edited 2 times in total.

JohnHopkins
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12 Aug 2009, 6:55 pm

I'd go one better and suggest that an internet forum is most definitely not the place to find love.

Saspie
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12 Aug 2009, 7:16 pm

Tim_Tex wrote:

For future reference, if a woman gives you lots of non-negotiable requirements, you meet them and then she knocks you back anyway, it means she is probably using those requirements to scare you off as she is not interested. It is how some people think they are letting someone down gently but I guess you did not get the hint. If someone says they are not interested in you, just leave it, or else it becomes unwanted pressure.

Quote:

She also used weird terminology that I had never heard of, and I didn't know what she meant by them, so how could I have known what she was talking about?

More specifically?

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12 Aug 2009, 10:02 pm

Tim_Tex wrote:

You get judged for your approach, I think she made the decision the moment you added it up for her. There aren't many women who want the man to be frank with her on that level. For starters, if she's already content, she may not see any need to just settle down. Something you definately want to look for is something she's missing in life.

It's really easy for a lot of women I know because they usually want someone to care for them (being subjective here). The girl you mentioned seems to be able to take care of herself, so that narrows it down a little.

1. Be dead sexy. There's more than a handful of reasons to go to the gym here, most guys I know don't and after awhile, you can really tell the difference brtween the two.

2. Make her laugh. I don't know how you approach this one, I know a ton of jokes, but I can only make people laugh with 1 or 2 at a time. The way an AS interacts can be funny to some people, I think I've used some of that to get a laugh.

From experience, those 2 things have helped me where the providing part has failed. Just remember, that giving her too much attention can make her uncomfortable, no matter what you bring to the table (once again, subjective information here).

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13 Aug 2009, 12:40 am

Cade wrote:

And his conflicting and unrealistic list of what he wants in a woman reads like the typical personal ad on a white supremacist dating page.

Please, find a link, or quote by Tim specificaly to point out ONE racist line in the past five years. .........

PM me these quotes and maybe I'll thik about it.

And, where did you honestly get the idea that republicans and or Christians are white only?There are republican African Americans, Asians, and Hispanics. You clearly havn't been to a black, mixed, or white church have you?

Really, to assume that a mass group is 100% a only one single ethnic group is actualy..... 'unrealistic'.

Last edited by LiendaBalla on 13 Aug 2009, 1:19 am, edited 8 times in total.

ViperaAspis
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13 Aug 2009, 12:48 am

JohnHopkins wrote:

I'd go one better and suggest that an internet forum is most definitely not the place to find love.

I disagree (sorry). Love finds you. It may be in an internet forum or a grocery store or in World of Warcraft or when you're whitewater rafting down a river. There are plenty of people who have found love on an internet forum. There are plenty of people who have not. Don't limit your options. There is no reason to.

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ToadOfSteel
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13 Aug 2009, 12:51 am

ViperaAspis wrote:

If love is supposed to find you, it's taking its damn sweet time finding me...

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13 Aug 2009, 1:52 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:

ViperaAspis wrote:

If love is supposed to find you, it's taking its damn sweet time finding me...

I know, Toad. Hang in there. You have a lot to offer. It will take time. There is a long road ahead of you. This is both a blessing and a curse, I know.

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C-57D
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13 Aug 2009, 2:08 am

ViperaAspis wrote:

I know, Toad. Hang in there. You have a lot to offer. It will take time. There is a long road ahead of you. This is both a blessing and a curse, I know.

Ain't it just... :cry:

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13 Aug 2009, 2:23 am

ViperaAspis wrote:

I disagree (sorry). Love finds you.

I have to disagree with this too. Love does not always find one. For some people, there is no one out there for them. Or if there is someone out there that would like them, they may never find them or run into them, given the population of the world. No one likes to hear this though but it is true. If it were not true, then no one would die without experiencing love, and this is just not the case. I have a relative (HFA or AS, but never been diagnosed) who is in his 70s who has never ever had a girlfriend, for example.

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13 Aug 2009, 2:42 am

Saspie wrote:

ViperaAspis wrote:

I disagree (sorry). Love finds you.

It's not a guarantee and I never implied that it was. Love is not guaranteed to find you. But IF it does, it finds you, not the other way around. Your statement and mine are not mutually exclusive. If it suits you, go ahead and accept the advice and limit yourself from finding love on internet forums. This will further reduce the probability that it finds you, but this is your right.

In Toad's case in particular, I personally just don't get it. I've read a lot of his posts and I think he has a lot to offer. Obviously, sunshower and others think so too. I have high hopes that it will happen for him eventually, but it may not be until he is older and his "target audience" (if you will) are more mature.

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Saspie
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13 Aug 2009, 2:52 am

ViperaAspis wrote:

Ok I misunderstood your meaning then. I still disagree. I don't think one necessarily needs to be found by love and it does not sound like that is what you are saying seeing as you are saying one should not restrict where they look for work. Love needs to be found, by people going out and meeting the types of people they are interested in. And when you meet someone you have the potential to love, after the lust period wears off (it does to some degree for many people), love takes work. I think perhaps this is just semantics and we are just saying the same thing but differently perhaps.

Quote:

In Toad's case in particular, I personally just don't get it. I've read a lot of his posts and I think he has a lot to offer. Obviously, sunshower and others think so too. I have high hopes that it will happen for him eventually, but it may not be until he is older and his "target audience" (if you will) are more mature.

I don't know Toad personally but sometimes the most suprising people can be single. I cannot really remember having been single so may just not understand (I pretty much went from one person to another from the age of 15 with only short gaps in between) but when I finally did meet someone to fall in love with, he had been single for three years. I could not work out why! Attractive, smart, funny, nice, secure, etc. I think part of it is luck in being in the right place at the right time to meet someone for those that have a lot to offer but have been single for a while. To go from that to love, is not always easy however.

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13 Aug 2009, 3:27 am

Saspie wrote:

Ok I misunderstood your meaning then. I think perhaps this is just semantics and we are just saying the same thing but differently

Or I screwed up how I wrote it

. I'm no written communication expert, I'm afraid. And you're absolutely right: it's semantics; we're agreeing here.

Quote:

Isn't that an interesting phenomenon? I did that "tarzan" thing too, swinging from one to another. The really quality ones were almost inexplicably single! I absolutely agree about the luck factor too. Love (or what preceeds it) cannot find you if you give it no opportunities to do so. You have to get out there. Otherwise, the probability is zero. Even if your luck is bad and the probability is low, .001 is better than zero. That's along the lines of what I was going towards with the suggestion not to limit oneself from finding love in any particular place. Now I'm really certain we're saying the same thing, just differently.

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13 Aug 2009, 6:53 am

ViperaAspis wrote:

JohnHopkins wrote:

I'd go one better and suggest that an internet forum is most definitely not the place to find love.

You have a point, but for the same reason limiting yourself to just an internet forum is a bad move because it greatly reduces your chances.

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