why you are a virgin?

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'Because I haven't had sexual intercourse with someone before.'

Seems like a simple enough question to answer.

because im scared s**tless, havent found a guy, and when i really think about it it just seems terribly awkward. XD. i want to, but like.....! it looks like it would be awkward.

For me, it's been a string of missed opportunities and bad luck.

Seconded, except switch "guy" with "girl"...

I'm not really looking for sex. If it happens, it happens... but what I'm specifically searching for overall is someone to be with in general, not just sex...

That said, if you're ever in NJ, drop me a line

Too much work to find a girl and have a relationship with sex is not important to me I don't know why though.

lots of reasons.

the most basic being the overwhelming pre-emptive rejection from guys. And by pre-emptive rejection I mean, the way they treated me all through the years made it clear that I wasn't going to get anywhere with them. Not that I tried, after puberty.

Then for some reason, probably the antidepressants, I was asexual for a long long time. That went away a few years after I stopped taking them.

When you say "all through the years" are you talking about childhood? I just ask because you said "not that I tried, after puberty". Just for the record, boys are supposed to reject you before they hit puberty. It's a natural developmental phase. I think you should try again, if you are up for it. I've written too many posts pleading with men to not categorize all women according to experiences they have had in the past. This applies to women not categorizing men, too. There is no such thing as pre-rejected. Just as all women are individuals, so are all men. Those you have known are not predictive of those you have yet to meet.

It started in the childhood years. It CONTINUED after puberty. And since it was every single boy that I encountered in school, you'll excuse me for generalizing.

And this was two different sets of schools.

Why would I try after puberty if all the boys AFTER puberty hated me and made it abundantly clear?

Last edited by Shebakoby on 18 Sep 2009, 11:44 am, edited 1 time in total.

I feel like I don't really have an interesting answer to this question. It just never happened. I could lose my virginity if I wanted to in the sense that I could buy sex from a prostitute if I wanted to, but I don't.

You're an adult now. Men are different from boys. Give them another try. Here's a girl-tip (hopefully not too NT girly). Give older men a chance. Men who are older than you will automatically give you attractiveness bonus points just for being younger than them. You are 36 (I looked). Turn your eye towards the middle aged men. Yes, the single ones are probably on the rebound from a divorce or are confirmed bachelors, but that doesn't mean you are pre-rejected by them. The fact that you are younger than them is a bonus in their eyes- truth! And your inexperience is not percieved with the negativity that it would be if you were a man of the same age.

Shebakoby,
I've also had a rough time with boys during that time period. However, once they reach their 20s or 30s they often become more mature and sweeter, from what I've seen so far.

Anyway, the reason I'm single and virgin is from lousy luck. It takes me a while to develop trust, an emotional attachment, and sexual attraction, and when I do, the people I've been attracted to have been unavailable for one reason or another. Also, at the same time I'm curious about the idea of making love, I fear it because of bad experiences in the past.

Because I've never once bothered with dating, trying to get a gf, or trying to get laid.
It's just as well - there is more than enough BS involved in all three processes to render them completely unworthy of interest or effort. That, and I have better things to do anyways. Also, I really do not like people.

Any girls in my area on this forum want to be rid of their virginity, let me know. I can fix that No it won't hurt, cos I won't feel a thing ... No-one's complained to me before...

i wish i could add to this thread i very much regret the events of february 11 of this year and i can never drink guinness again because of it

oh well, right?

on the bright side i have the libido of a piece of cheese lately, and it doesn't even matter, i was only diagnosed this summer so i've been sorting through that, plus extremely busy at work. i just want to be alone all the time right now. feels good man.

then again i never get a friggin chance to be alone, feels bad man

yeah but I'm not hot anymore so there goes that idea. Men that age want 20something blonde bombshells. Not a slightly overweight former blonde. Besides, someone that much older than me, I don't think I'd like that. Too much temptation for them to try to treat me like a child.

And in THIS town? Many men that age DRINK. I do not want an alcoholic.

Don't throw in the towel so easily. Yes of course men that age want 20something blond bombshells. I suspect that a great many men of every age want that. They also want Angelina Jolie, Paris Hilton, and whatever attractive woman was on the billboard they just drove past. But it's not going to happen. They will probably try. Unless they are wealthy or have some other magnetic quality, they will fail. Those women are just a fantasy. 20something blond bombshells do not mate up with middle aged men unless there is something fairly significant in it for them that makes the middle aged men more attractive than the 20something handsome men who are actually in their league. And there usually isn't. Who is actually in the middle aged single man's league? Divorced middle aged women. Divorced middle aged women some of whom are inevitably slightly overweight and all of whom are former [whatever their hair color used to be]. You, by comparison, are younger. That matters. Slightly overweight you may be, but so are the other women who are actually in their league.

I must admit you are absolutely right that a middle aged man will probably do some age-based patronizing. But is that really so bad? It would be annoying sometimes, but it is impossible to be in a relationship without ever being annoyed. And there must be some who aren't alcoholics. Just drinking doesn't make you an alcoholic. Being a slave to it is what makes the alcoholic.