Importance of isolation

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IMO" Forgive the interruption..." sounds odd and overly formal. I understand why you wouldn't want to approach a woman in front of a crowd, as a matter of fact it kind of pisses me off if someone asks me out in front of people. I figure they are thinking I'll say yes just so I won't embarrass them and it makes me feel manipulated. Is there a way you can meet women that gives you privacy but not complete isolation? I agree if a woman is completely alone and any man approaches her she is bound to be on her guard. It's just a fact of life. You are starting at a disadvantage. If you like the park idea-go where there is a fair amount of pedestrian traffic and sit on a bench and read a good book. Are you interested in the kind of woman who would be interested in a man who reads? What I'm saying is there are ways to present yourself so they may approach you and sit near you and then maybe you can start a conversation.

Who's being harassing and creepy to who right now, Janissy?

I asked you to share your opinion, but you keep repeatedly posting in ways meant to subtly tear down my self-esteem.

How ironic.

Honestly if someone I didn't know approached me and started talking to me in a place with very few other people, the main thought going through my head would be how to get out of there. I know not everyone who talks to people in those situations means any harm, but there is always the possibility and I would always be looking for any possible danger.
Somewhere like a park might be ok if I could see a few other people around. My advice would be if you want to approach people just make sure there are at least 2 or 3 other people in easy sight and easy shouting distance at all times. Having people around I could yell to if I needed would definately make me feel a bit safer.

I somehow very much doubt that's your intention, Janissy.

You've made your point 6-7 times already. I ask that you leave me alone now.

Seriously dude, that's not going to work. You should have at least some people in the background, in the immediate area, even if they are not very closeby (but at least in visual distance). If there are other people in visual proximity, it'll be better than if you try to approach someone when absolutely nobody else is around.

Hey look, I know how you feel... You share one of the basic fears among the male gender: you don't want to be rejected. We all subconsciously come up with some kind of defense mechanism to protect us from the fallout of such a failure. You keep mentioning how you want to be in a secluded place when you bring it up, possibly to deny that the rejection ever happened. On the other hand, I prefer waiting until I know the woman in question and only go for it if I think she actually does like me back (so far it's not happening, though)...

The point, however, is to look at this from the woman's perspective (and that's one of the greatest difficulties of anyone with AS). Yes, to you it looks innocent enough. But a woman who doesn't know you won't know that such is your intention. As far as she knows, you could be just the same as that guy that would take advantage of her... I'm not saying that you are, but she has no way of reading your mind or knowing that...

ToadOfSteel is right. I have to consciously stop and pretend to be the other person before I can see it. It's ironic if I know my intentions are harmless I will automatically assume the other person will react the way I expect them to. That's why you have to stop and do the mental switch. That's my problem with theory of mind. I can reason out Sally/Ann and I'm not arrogant enough to think my perspective is the only one that matters- it's more a naive expectation that my world encompasses everybody.

Thanks for all the reasonable comments left in the thread, ToadOfSteel and Aimless. I'm persistent and headstrong about this, but I have thought about your words for a while.

I may let the park fill up with a few other people and/or wait until there are boats closeby out on the lake. just as long as she knows she can easily get help if I turn out to be a weirdo, it won't be a problem.

everyone have a good evening.

i'm sorry, but that avatar isn't helping you sound any less creepy .
and not to be offensive but reading this thread has been delightfully hilarious.
especially since the women make a great point. and how you're not seeing it at all.

you've just made my day .

People behave differently on their own than they do with their friends. This I suppose has something to do with the compromises people make when interacting with other people. Also, things like dating are on a one-on-one basis. "Never ask a girl out for coffee/try to get her number in front of her friends". This is a rule that I've followed to the letter. Of course, then there are lots of girls who are rarely seen on their own. I can relate to this, and it's all part of the frustration. Just randomly asking a girl to go away from her friends and talk to you would be an efficient solution if it worked, but it doesn't because it takes people too far out of their comfort zone.