Girlfriend cheats on you... do you care?

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How would you know it's worse if it did not happen? And what the hell kind of girlfriend did you have? Does not sound like a very fun relationship....

It's something I care very much about. It breaks any trust and usually leads to a break up. I refuse to accept a girl cheating on me, it's not something they would do if they cared about me or valued our relationship.

1) she was a geek(im also a geek - but she had a skill i do not got - she made www sites. but we could both build, repair, upgrade puters tho)

2) she was fine at first - her mr. hyde side came out over time and i never noticed it happening.
then when her true self came all the way out - it hit me like a ton of bricks.

3) we never got to sex at all - she turned on me before we even could get to it.

4) i am still healing from it. it is still ever so very much an open wound.

If i was cheated on, I would be concerned, and probably ready to end the relationship. But I am also capable of forgiveness, and would be willing to do just that if she would be willing to not become a repeat offender (if it does become a habit, then obviously i would have to leave the relationship)

but as for me - i would FORGIVE her - but i would never TRUST her ever again for it.

I don't care how lonely I am or would be. If she cheated on me - even just once, she is out the door. I do NOT tolerate cheaters, and NEVER would I ever do that to any woman! I find that morally loathsome. To me cheating is just as bad as hitting a woman!

A cheater is a temporary(very rarely, permanent) parasite.
Once identified, should be removed, no mercy.

Flirting is cheating.

I would be concerned. I suppose I would try to bring it up for conversation. Might be hard to do without spooking her, so I would need to reassure her somehow.

if it spooks her - that is a very good thing - then it confirms what you were thinking and is an ADMISSION of guilt

Petty.

Honestly, I never understood the point of jealousy. You can't force someone to love you. I don't cheat, but I don't mind if my boyfriend does, as long as he tells me about it, and doesn't come home with a disease or something. I just want him to be happy.

Supposedly quite often you'll see them go on the aggressive, act like they suspect that you're cheating, and when things get that far flung that it just seems surreal - may be a good time to do something like flip through her phone records or texts while she's in the shower.

jealousy is NOT the point - the POINT is about TRUST, and HONESTY, and being FAITHFUL to your partner - the if the partner cheats on you - and you do not mind - then that just tells him it is ok to do it in future relationships. imagine if he cheats on a future wife(and it is not you), and you let it slide when he was with you - then he WILL cheat on a future wife - and she might not be as forgiving. plus - in many states - sexual cheating is sufficiant grounds to file for divorce (and/or to cut his dick and balls off {depending on the woman and how pissed off she is at him}). if a woman cheated on me - i would kick her ass out of the house and straight to the curb for riding(''cowgirl'' sexual intercourse position) on another man and for betraying the trust i had in her. the betrayal of trust would hurt me a lot more than the cheating.

also - if you do not cheat and you do not mind if boyfriend does - doesn't that make you into a hypocrite?

Last edited by lewdi28792 on 10 Jan 2010, 7:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I could handle an open relationship. In fact, I've done it quite well. Does it make me happy? No. Does happiness matter? Perhaps. Perhaps if we have souls. The judges are still out on that one tho,

If i found out they cheated i be destroyed inside but atleast she and the other guy are happy as long as there ok dont mind if she comes to me and kicks me in the teeth at least she is happy cuz i feel im not worth anyones time as long as everone else is happy i can go to hell.

I think the big challenge here especially, for guys with AS, is not taking so personally as having it be a direct attack on their self worth. I say this because we've had enough acquaintances in our circle who were about as GQ as they come; guys like that get cheated on just as often and as easily as anyone else.

That said its knowing that the relationship from that point forward, regardless of who you are, is f'd up. I don't think its even a personal slap in the face so much as either fear of commitment in a partner, something in them sabotaging it, or likely more often a sign that either the chemistry is gone or that and they're seeking a new partner while still with you, to where they flat out don't care about sealing the deal behind your back. It means there's really not much left. Of course, then again, this is from the standpoint that you've been dating them for a few months or a little less than a year, if you're already married to them - things are a bit more complicated and its neither necessarily easy nor wise to kick them out on a whim, a lot more thinking needs to be done and - if they've been faithful up to that point, figuring out what went wrong, why it went wrong, and essentially yes - can the situation be salvaged for both parties.