I act too much like a guy. :(

Page 2 of 4 [ 51 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next

Keith
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Aug 2008
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,321
Location: East Sussex, UK

22 Jan 2010, 7:26 pm

valkyrieraven88 wrote:
Advice: Hang out with geeks. I am dating one and I cannot recommend it enough. They're socially awkward and the guys will definitely notice that you're a girl, and they'll appreciate any interests you have in common. Thanks to my computer-loving boyfriend, I now have an upgraded laptop and a new hard drive, plus he bought me a Nintendo DS for Christmas and got me an R4 card that has almost 60 games on it.


Sounds like you could be using them :roll: Getting something out of a relationship...



Spazzergasm
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,415
Location: Maine

22 Jan 2010, 7:46 pm

There aren't any geeks here...Hopefully in America. that may be good advice.
Lol, oddly I'm always attracted to the more silent, unapproachable types. XD They seem sweet and stuff, but there's no way to connect.
Most of my friends arent guys, actually. I hang out with virtually all girls. but I act boyish. and i *look* feminine i guess, but i dont know...it's like my chemistry is wrong or something....or maybe i just cant pick up on anything... :roll:
i wish i'd find a guy i could share every thought with...and nothing would be all painful and awkward. :(
thanks for the replies though. everyone's views are a real benefit/pleasure to read.



valkyrieraven88
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2010
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 222
Location: St. Louis, MO

22 Jan 2010, 9:51 pm

Hey, I thought I'd never get there, and I did. It just kind of fell into my lap one day. I think it was worse when I was stressing out about it. Do something that makes you happy. You seem kinda awesome.



kc8ufv
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jul 2008
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 762
Location: Toledo, OH

22 Jan 2010, 10:07 pm

Spazzergasm wrote:
There aren't any geeks here...Hopefully in America. that may be good advice.
Lol, oddly I'm always attracted to the more silent, unapproachable types. XD They seem sweet and stuff, but there's no way to connect.


If you are more interested in those kind of guys, why not try observing from a distance for a short period, see what they seem to like. If it's something similar to something you like, especially if it's an activity that can be done with another person, ask them if they want to go do that with you. Worst that can happen is they say no.



ghostpawn
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 15 Feb 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 125
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada

22 Jan 2010, 11:38 pm

mitharatowen wrote:
The part that I find ironic is that, despite all their complaining and professing to not understand women, men actually want a feminine girl. I did not understand this when I was younger. I thought that boy would/should like me because I wasn't going to slap them for making sexist jokes or scold them for burping and would love going to monster truck rallies and would never drag them to the opera and on and on. It was not until recent years that I realized my masculinity (or perhaps non-femininity is the right term) actually confused and repelled them. I thought that guys really meant it when they complained about females. Apperently they like the regular female behavior because that is how girls are "supposed" to be and they possibly complain because they are supposed to as well.


I don't find anything confusing and repulsive in there. Maybe your appearance doesn't match your behavior?

Like a cheerleader whose main interests are vampires, death metal, and martial arts. There's nothing wrong with that, but guys who would totally be compatible with her, maybe don't look for cheerleaders! (unless they've seen Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

mitharatowen wrote:
Females are the same way. They complain about stereotypical macho males but few of them want to date feminine males.


Based on soaps and romance novels, I'd guess many women want men who look tough but have a big heart. I'd guess not many of those are available, if so many women are willing to date one jerk after another to find one.


_________________
Free 3D Images


Salonfilosoof
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Dec 2009
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,184

23 Jan 2010, 7:30 am

Spazzergasm wrote:
i dont know how to flirt...i dont want to flirt. i slouch when i sit. i think burping contests are fun. dressing in baggy comfort clothes is better than dressing to look hot. i snort when i laugh....the list goes on. :(
i mean, im not disgusting or anything. i smell nice, and dont have halitosis...i say some weird sh**, or too much info, but im never offensive really....
i guess guys must never approach me because i'm not feminine enough? is it every guy who is put off by chicks who act like "one of the guys"? it makes me feel bad. i think i'm coming to realise i simply dont act girly enough.


I'm personally very much attracted to the "tomboy" type of woman. In fact, I would say the perfect woman has the body of the slender woman and the mind of a genius man :)



ToadOfSteel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,157
Location: New Jersey

23 Jan 2010, 8:25 am

You know, your problem is that you might be smarter than a lot of guys. Guys innately love to "rescue" the "damsel in distress". Almost every guy (aside from pre-pubescent kids and some asexuals) have some kind of "knight in shining armor" fantasy, whether they realize it or not. (my personal one is "IT guy in shining armor") However, for this to work, a woman needs to "need" the rescuing, and a lot of women will do things that allow a guy to "live" said fantasy. Some might ask their certain someone to open jars for them even if they are perfectly capable of doing that themselves. Others will play dumb on a problem that needs to be solved.

There's a reason why "rescuing the girl" has been a theme in literature since time immemorial (at least the days of Homer, if not earlier): it's hard-wired into the male brain. If you don't "need" rescuing, you might put off some otherwise attracted guys. That said, don't become completely effeminate either... if you can fulfill the biological need mentioned above, guys will love that they can actually understand you...



Spazzergasm
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,415
Location: Maine

23 Jan 2010, 10:05 am

Salonfilosoof wrote:
I'm personally very much attracted to the "tomboy" type of woman. In fact, I would say the perfect woman has the body of the slender woman and the mind of a genius man :)


do you not like women?



racooneyes
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 23 Sep 2009
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 410
Location: blackeye, outer rim

23 Jan 2010, 10:17 am

He wants a man with a vagina. A mangina if you will.

:P

I think being girly or not is mainly a problem for relationships with other girls most guys wont give a f to be honest some even prefer ladettes.


_________________
read all the pamphlets and watch the tapes!

get all confused and then mix up the dates.


Spazzergasm
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,415
Location: Maine

23 Jan 2010, 10:24 am

racooneyes wrote:
He wants a man with a vagina. A mangina if you will.

:P

I think being girly or not is mainly a problem for relationships with other girls most guys wont give a f to be honest some even prefer ladettes.


:lol:

ladettes, nice word. XD well, i hope i find someone who wants a ladette/pseudo girly.



Aimless
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Apr 2009
Age: 67
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,187

23 Jan 2010, 10:38 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:
You know, your problem is that you might be smarter than a lot of guys. Guys innately love to "rescue" the "damsel in distress". Almost every guy (aside from pre-pubescent kids and some asexuals) have some kind of "knight in shining armor" fantasy, whether they realize it or not. (my personal one is "IT guy in shining armor") However, for this to work, a woman needs to "need" the rescuing, and a lot of women will do things that allow a guy to "live" said fantasy. Some might ask their certain someone to open jars for them even if they are perfectly capable of doing that themselves. Others will play dumb on a problem that needs to be solved.

There's a reason why "rescuing the girl" has been a theme in literature since time immemorial (at least the days of Homer, if not earlier): it's hard-wired into the male brain. If you don't "need" rescuing, you might put off some otherwise attracted guys. That said, don't become completely effeminate either... if you can fulfill the biological need mentioned above, guys will love that they can actually understand you...


That's probably true. I've always wondered if some women were really and truly afraid of a dead mouse or whether they were going for the squeal effect. I'm not a completely capable woman though and I often need help with the computer. Maybe I should stand by my computer and squeal and wave my hands around.


_________________
Detach ed


DemonAbyss10
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,492
Location: The Poconos, Pennsylvania

23 Jan 2010, 11:25 am

Aimless wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
You know, your problem is that you might be smarter than a lot of guys. Guys innately love to "rescue" the "damsel in distress". Almost every guy (aside from pre-pubescent kids and some asexuals) have some kind of "knight in shining armor" fantasy, whether they realize it or not. (my personal one is "IT guy in shining armor") However, for this to work, a woman needs to "need" the rescuing, and a lot of women will do things that allow a guy to "live" said fantasy. Some might ask their certain someone to open jars for them even if they are perfectly capable of doing that themselves. Others will play dumb on a problem that needs to be solved.

There's a reason why "rescuing the girl" has been a theme in literature since time immemorial (at least the days of Homer, if not earlier): it's hard-wired into the male brain. If you don't "need" rescuing, you might put off some otherwise attracted guys. That said, don't become completely effeminate either... if you can fulfill the biological need mentioned above, guys will love that they can actually understand you...


That's probably true. I've always wondered if some women were really and truly afraid of a dead mouse or whether they were going for the squeal effect. I'm not a completely capable woman though and I often need help with the computer. Maybe I should stand by my computer and squeal and wave my hands around.


most that would elicit from me is a facepalm or two, and perhaps me just wandering off somewhere else.


_________________
Myers Brigg - ISTP
Socionics - ISTx
Enneagram - 6w5

Yes, I do have a DeviantArt, it is at.... http://demonabyss10.deviantart.com/


Aimless
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Apr 2009
Age: 67
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,187

23 Jan 2010, 11:34 am

DemonAbyss10 wrote:
Aimless wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
You know, your problem is that you might be smarter than a lot of guys. Guys innately love to "rescue" the "damsel in distress". Almost every guy (aside from pre-pubescent kids and some asexuals) have some kind of "knight in shining armor" fantasy, whether they realize it or not. (my personal one is "IT guy in shining armor") However, for this to work, a woman needs to "need" the rescuing, and a lot of women will do things that allow a guy to "live" said fantasy. Some might ask their certain someone to open jars for them even if they are perfectly capable of doing that themselves. Others will play dumb on a problem that needs to be solved.

There's a reason why "rescuing the girl" has been a theme in literature since time immemorial (at least the days of Homer, if not earlier): it's hard-wired into the male brain. If you don't "need" rescuing, you might put off some otherwise attracted guys. That said, don't become completely effeminate either... if you can fulfill the biological need mentioned above, guys will love that they can actually understand you...


That's probably true. I've always wondered if some women were really and truly afraid of a dead mouse or whether they were going for the squeal effect. I'm not a completely capable woman though and I often need help with the computer. Maybe I should stand by my computer and squeal and wave my hands around.


most that would elicit from me is a facepalm or two, and perhaps me just wandering off somewhere else.

:)


_________________
Detach ed


Spazzergasm
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,415
Location: Maine

23 Jan 2010, 12:08 pm

Aimless wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
That's probably true. I've always wondered if some women were really and truly afraid of a dead mouse or whether they were going for the squeal effect. I'm not a completely capable woman though and I often need help with the computer. Maybe I should stand by my computer and squeal and wave my hands around.


most that would elicit from me is a facepalm or two, and perhaps me just wandering off somewhere else.


lol, well if it's a live mouse or spider...believe me, they are afraid. the screaming is simply stimming i guess....XD



Spazzergasm
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2009
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,415
Location: Maine

23 Jan 2010, 12:08 pm

Aimless wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
That's probably true. I've always wondered if some women were really and truly afraid of a dead mouse or whether they were going for the squeal effect. I'm not a completely capable woman though and I often need help with the computer. Maybe I should stand by my computer and squeal and wave my hands around.


most that would elicit from me is a facepalm or two, and perhaps me just wandering off somewhere else.


lol, well if it's a live mouse or spider...believe me, they are afraid. the screaming is simply stimming i guess....XD



ToadOfSteel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Sep 2007
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,157
Location: New Jersey

23 Jan 2010, 1:13 pm

DemonAbyss10 wrote:
most that would elicit from me is a facepalm or two, and perhaps me just wandering off somewhere else.


But an NT man would charge in there, keyboard drawn, ready to do battle with the fire-breathing dragon that is Microsoft Windows...

...and most likely wouldn't know what he's doing