C'mon, a little advice for Sho sho...

Post Reply New Topic

Agreed. That was my point. No matter where you live in the world, you cannot state that the definition of a wife is someone who sponges off her husband. It may have been the case for yourself or people you know, but that is not sufficient to make something 'almost a definition'

too late, Lene. I already did.

^Exactly. The key word there is "using" which isn't acceptable in any relationship. I'm sure that's not what Mrs Sinsboldy was implying, so i was just clarifying.

Unfortunately, those were the words he chose to use when referring to wives.

ok, Sinsboldly, you did already say it, fair enough .. That still doesn't make your generalisation correct though.

Yes. You seem like a very interesting person. Go well with your relationship.
I know one a lot like it. I am curious if we have special interests in common also,
and we could be "penpals" about them. Probably not, but wonderful if so.

absolutely. He is an aspie so mentally in some ways he's more like a 40 year old or 50 year old. A 41 year old woman is like an 18 year old male sexually (trust me, I am 41). I wish them the best...yesterday someone on here recommended "cougars" to younger men on the spectrum and in this circumstance I think it could work. May or may not be a lifelong thing but not every relationship is, it doesn't mean it's not worthwhile.

well, i guess it depends: is the person in love with:

-- a number
-- a physical form
-- another person

i'll note here that my grandmother was 12 years older than my grandfather. they were together 33 years (till she died).

No. The age gap is currently too large based upon the percentage of his age.

From both PoV's, there's something wrong when they cannot find solace in the company of the people of their own age group. There's someting even more wrong when (potentially) looking at someone 15 years your junior as a potential mate.

A 26 year old has vastly different ideas of what constitutes a relationship than a 41 year old (obviously). However, the 41 year old and the 56 year old (advancing 15 years) will not be looking looking at a relationship the same way.

Advance to 65 (retirement) and 50. I shudder at the idea. He still has 15 more years of work ahead of him (unless she's loaded and both can retire), while she's done. This will build up resentment.

No. Find someone closer to your own age for a serious relationship and keep him around for a short time for fun. You're not raising a son, and he's no where near mature enough to think decades down the road (and you need to do the serious thinking for both of you obviously).

i love how someone says "no" like they actually have the info on what will happen with this couple in the future.

when my grandparents met, he was 21 and she 33, which seems a fair percentage of his age at the time. of course, as they aged, it was less and less so.

I personally have a bit to say on this one.

I'm 22 and in a relationship with a woman who will be 39 this month. It may sound like a huge age gap, but guess what? She makes me happy like nobody else ever could. And her? She's just as much in love as I am. We compliment one another perfectly, and neither of us, in all our lives, has found someone who could help us rise to another level as a person like we can for each other. We've only been together for three years, and I can't say what will happen in five years, or ten, or twenty, but we're in love, and we're happy. We'll find out together.

Yes, society has problems with it - but that's society's problem, not ours. We could never be a conventional couple anyway - I'm an aspie.

There are no guarantees in life and to constantly qualify statements as "IMO" or "I know of one case" means not putting yourself on the line because you're afraid of being wrong.

A person can say "Sure, I know YY" as well as point to "Unfortunately, I know XX". All opinions put forth are simply that - opinions. Hopefully with the backing of a little judgement and knowledge but at the end of the day, they remain an opinion.

State your opinion and acknowledge you may be wrong. But never be afraid to say "No" or "Yes" when you think it's appropriate.

Otherwise you're stuck in the world of "maybe" to which is applicable to everything.

For those interested, a few core concepts are available at http://ezinearticles.com/?Understanding-­Age-­Gap-­Relationships&id=94787 citing: Tan, Shei "Understanding Age Gap Relationships." Understanding Age Gap Relationships.

ok, good point.

thanks

There’s a pretty strong chance that an older woman has a few relationships under her belt, and if she’s single again, she’s likely to have had her fill of men telling her what to do. If you’re the type of man who demands things to happen his way and his way only, you could be in for a tough ride. However, if you’re at the point in your life where you’d like more input from your better half and are craving a more collaborative lifestyle, then an older woman could be for you.