Biology and lust.

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So, in fantasy you want to be with fantasy women and in real life you want to be with real life women? Makes perfect sense to me, there is nothing wrong with that.

The problem is that most people don't have a good handle on the difference separating fantasy and reality. The realm of fantasy is real, not physically real, but it is still real, like say, a mathematical thereom is real. In the realm of fantasy exists the idea of feminine sexual beauty. This idea ultimately transcends physical form, but mundane human beings generally need a physical form in order to get a handle on something; They don't believe in things they can't physically see, they can't grasp an idea until they see a word for it. Most people these days see being tall and thin as being attractive, these things have come to *represent* attractiveness, but in reality they do not *define* attractive. In the same way that the number "7", consisting of a horizontal line on top and the diagnal line going south-west represents the idea of the number 7, but it does not define the idea of a 7.

But then people think that forms like tallness and thinness representing attractiveness is some misanthropic plot by the powers-that-be to make us all feel insecure. I see it as simply a matter of communication. The idea of the number 7 does not have to be represented with the the symbol for 7, but wouldn't it be awfully confusing if people put the symbols for "4" or the letter "g" when they mean 7? The same way, if someone making an advertisement wants to evoke the idea of attractiveness, they are going to use common recognizable forms of what represents attractiveness in their culture, or else their message will be diluted or lost.

But obviously what represents attractiveness does come to define attractiveness to many people, but that is only they are too shallow and unintelligent to truly appreciate the truth that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Anyway, what I'm getting at, is that when we dwell in the realm of fantasy, generally things are airy and vague and we only have a tenous grasp on them; we can't see them or feel them or hear them as well as we could if we were interacting physically with them. So in such a state of course we resort to simplistic and generic physical forms of beauty. It's like doing a complicated math problem, of course it is possible to do math with all the symbols for numbers switched around, but it would be very very confusing and we'll keep losing out train of thought.

Think of the forms of generic attractiveness as being a symbol. Many people, if they see a swastika, they feel fear, but a swastika is just a bunch of perpendicular lines, nothing to be objectively afraid of, they might fear that more than they fear seeing an actual dangerous neo-nazi person. If someone is fearfully obsessed with nazis, it would not be strange if they were obsessed with swastikas.

But when it comes to physical attractiveness it is more complicated because we are dealing with the very forms that humans have deluded themselves into identifying themselves with. This is the part where it gets all Buddhist and even more metaphysical... but my point is... Humans identify with their physical form, but in reality one human can be everything: a human can be strong one moment and weak at other moments, beautiful or ugly, smart or dumb, moral or immoral. Therefore, looking at the physical form of a person is like looking at a word that has an established conventional meaning even though in reality the word is just a placeholder and could mean anything.

Fads, Marketing, and Industries.

Up to 1900 the full figured woman was the image of woman. It was not just Rubens, all of the painters showed full bodied as the ideal. Most cultures still do.

The change comes suddenly in America, and it had to do with the vote and equality. Mary Pickford, short hair, flat chested, wearing a shapeless dress. That was followed by Flappers, still in a skirt, but drinking, smoking, short hair, and just one of the boys.

In the 30's full bodied makes a comeback, May West, but she does speak her mind.

It is said that the WWI war babies came of age during WWII. In Europe sex was directed at starving war orphans, the gaunt and hungry look. The full body continued, as a pin up, out of your league, and the gaunt model, was what could be had for a chocolate bar. Twiggi played into this stereotype.

The prototype of Barbie was a German doll, for adults, a post war sex worker, with less chest. Barbie was made the all American girl, 38 14 26, with extra legs and tiny feet. She had everything, and no one asked where she got it.

Bratz dolls hint at where the money is.

Real women seem trapped in the middle, a 90% failure with 5% full figure and 5% thin and curvey being marketed. While this sells diets and plastic surgeons, it does so by making the rest feel inferior.

When I see the hair, makup, clothes, I wonder what they really look like. When I see a plainly dressed girl with glasses minding her own business, I am strongly attracted. They are so ordinary, just people, and no one notices them.

I say things like, "Hello", and introduce myself. After three or four times, she might tell me her name.
Acting like ordinary people slowly getting to know each other works. That ordinary day to day stuff is all that works in the long term. Someone who is glad to see me, someone I can talk to, and it works for them the same.

You are from Earth! So am I!

I check out women in public like anyone else, but that's only when I'm genuinely interested in the woman and have a pure attraction for her, not just looking at her because my body wants to reproduce.

I should also mention that when I hung out with my ex, I never noticed other women, and she never noticed other men. I know for a fact other men were checking her out, and she didn't even seem to care or bother to notice. I see women in relationships look at really good looking guys like my brother like "I'm unhappy with my relationship, I really wish I was with you." That isn't a relationship. Same for the guys that have a girlfriend, then masturbate to porn on a daily basis and say "it's just fantasy." When I knew my ex, I didn't look at any porn, and we weren't even having intercourse.

My problem seems to be that in pictures and high quality videos, I've developed a habit of lusting after the barbie doll types, and it's become an addiction to the point where I seek them out on dating sites.

I think because they represent sex. I have the same attraction to butch studs. Who are pretty much useless for anything but sex. They aren't going be much in the way of conversation and they are going to cheat on you, bank on it. But it's a sex thing. So I relate to this, if in a different way.

It's kind of like when I want to eat something sweet I always want chocolate because it's the best even though it's unhealthy, unsatisfying and has no nutritional value. You want what you want

If you are just talking about masturbation I don't see the harm in it. Those women you are talking about, as far as porn goes, make their living triggering sexual feelings. You could probably dissect the appearance thing (blond hair= youth/ large breasts could equal either lots of food potential for spawn or a big butt on the front depending on which theory you follow/red lips = simulating of labia minora/ red cheeks = youth and and over-abundance of makeup is a signal in general that that woman is offering her sexual services (for a fee). It's a business model. It's kind of strange to me that all this porn stuff is so effective while being such a cold economical thing...it's about the benjamins not about sexuality at all. But whatever.

So we're both a product of societal brainwashing in other words?

I only have a problem with it when it becomes an obsession. I understand that when you're single, you're not only lonely, but horny (regardless of how much you enjoy sex) but do I have to be in a relationship all the time for this to dissipate or is this just my relectant special interest of sorts?

Dude there's nothing wrong with porn. It's the only reason why the internet is so popular. Milk it for all it's worth. Maybe one day you will get lucky and just lose interest in women. That is the easiest path. I don't recommend it to anyone else but I use drugs to help me deal with this very problem. Drugs can release the same chemicals that are released when we're in love or having sex. People might look down on me for saying this but I think really I will never feel pleasure the 'normal' way, and my chemicals are the closest I will get to feeling love, affection, and so on.

Let me clarify even further. I have no problem with liking women if it's a pure attraction and on top of liking her looks, I actually want to get to know her as a person and would want her to be my girlfriend.



That's kind of what my ex looked like. I don't mind that kind of attraction. She's pretty, in shape, but not so called "drop dead sexy."



That's the most family-friendly pic I could find of this girl. Would I like to have sex with her? What guy wouldn't. But the fact is, I've seen maybe 1 or 2 women like her in my life that could even compete with her, and to top it off, I've heard her interviewed and she isn't exactly the most friendly person. In some other world where a guy like myself dated her...even if she liked me and didn't bust my chops, I'm sure even the novelty of the sex would get old after several months and I'd be stuck with some high-maintenance snob.

I understand it's perfectly normal to find someone like that attractive, but it's not reality for 99.9% of guys.

*drools*



*thinks he would thoroughly enjoy the novelty, until it wore off*

Do yourself a favor and look up "Keeley Hazell"...you'll find plenty of non-family friendly pics.

she's an elongated skeleton with fake tits lol

Man, am I glad that's not what i see when I look at her. I'm perfectly happy being brainwashed, in this case.*still drooling*

Hmm...Thanks, I'll keep that in mind if I get a little um...lonely, tonight.

have all the elongated skeletons and twiggy alien female trevors you like lol

Hers are actually real, look for the uncovered version yourself

oooh, well you'll have to PM link me those lol
(I'm 21! lol)
even fake ones are fine (eg if I can squeeze em they're real enough)
I mean would I do her-yes
why not, its sex with a lady lol

Skeleton, she looks healthy enough to me maybe a little underweight but no where close to skeleton.