jagatai wrote:
I suspect that there is a very good chance that you will find many who like you. I think the thing you need to consider is that you might not recognize that they like you.
There were a number of incidents where I discovered too late that a woman was attracted to me and was flirting with me. It was my negative self image that made me assume that they didn't like me despite their strangely flirtatious behavior.
When I saw flirtatious behavior, I didn't know what to do so I backed away from these women. I think if I had just behaved in a friendly, but calm manner, I might have been able to form a closer, better relationship. Knowing myself, I doubt I would have made any further moves, but things could have been easier.
Lars
that is so true, I never got it, there were women I realize now were flirting with me back when I was younger but, strangely, their behavior was so overtly sexual/flirtatious that I thought they were mocking me or not being serious. Of course I realize now they were very serious. I pulled away and I realize now I came across as cold and probably even stuck up but I had no idea how to respond to that stuff. You can't really ask them what they think the event horizon is like or whatever.
As far as the original question I believe we actually have a better chance than NT's at attracting someone who likes us *for who we are* because we aren't putting up shingles and strobe lights and ostentatious displays of stuff that really isn't about who we are as people. I'm probably not qualified to talk about it either since except for this last crush I had I haven't even tried to flirt with or attract anyone since i moved to this town, which was 7 years ago. I just have devoted zero energy to it.
20 Mar 2010, 3:08 am
