Why do novels and movies portray sex and love like this?

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KittenWithAWhip
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27 Jun 2010, 6:57 pm

Yeah, my next romantic encounter better have perfect lighting and specially composed mood music, dammit. :lol:


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biostructure
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27 Jun 2010, 7:45 pm

nikki15 wrote:
Reality is no fun--for the most part.


I can agree to that!



Rakshasa72
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28 Jun 2010, 2:05 am

I always thought "The Great Gatsby" was a good portrait of how love actually works in modern culture.



musicboxforever
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28 Jun 2010, 7:28 am

Poppycocteau wrote:
But . . . love is beautiful, and the feelings are immense, and I think that really loving someone changes a person irrevocably. At the same time, though, love can be the most painful thing. It's not melodrama - it does actually hurt and can be absolutely debilitating to care about someone more than you care about yourself. I think that this complexity, this duality, is a very hard thing to truly depict in art . . . and in any case, people like happy endings and joyously theatrical representations. After all, you don't usually have to travel very far to find drudgery and sadness in real life.


Nicely said.

When I was younger I wrote a story for a writing class and my lecturer didn't like it because it was about an older guy falling for a younger woman and in the end they didn't get together. He said, no you can't write a love story like that and told me to watch Notting Hill for some inspiration. So if writers are getting advice like that, no wonder we're getting fed the same old unrealistic love stories in movies and books.

I actually like the film Pretty in Pink from the 80s. The two main characters don't have an easy relationship. You never know whether they actually slept together, it's left up to the mind of the viewer. There is alot of pain in it, but it does have a happy ending.



Northeastern292
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28 Jun 2010, 11:47 am

Asp-Z wrote:
Alla wrote:
I find that every movie or novel I have read that deals with the subject of love and sex portrays them very unrealistically. Films show sex scenes and romantic moments where the two lovers display these huge feelings for each other and the whole thing is sooooo beautiful. Ditto with discriptions in novels.

To be honest, I would love to see a film that actually deals with the realities of love and sex......no, not about the wife who leaves her boring/impotent husband for a young stud and has amazing sex with him. I mean, a film that focuses on the actual aspects of romance and sex.

In my opinion, and this is only me speaking, love is overrated.


Yup, especially Disney-type crap. And I agree that love is overrated, too.


Disney crap...indeed. Now comedies get this stuff right.



Dilbert
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28 Jun 2010, 11:53 am

Because it sells movie tickets and DVDs?



alexlvsport
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02 Jul 2010, 1:07 am

I recently watched a movie about love and relationships called Adam. It showed a relationship between a neurotypial girl and a man with aspergers. It portrays love realistically unlike your description above. I understand your point though. What really sucks is that people believe that and assume their relationship will be like that, when everyone's relationship is different. Its not fair for anyone to live up to that fantasy.



SaNcheNuSS
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02 Jul 2010, 1:44 am

Alla wrote:
I find that every movie or novel I have read that deals with the subject of love and sex portrays them very unrealistically. Films show sex scenes and romantic moments where the two lovers display these huge feelings for each other and the whole thing is sooooo beautiful. Ditto with discriptions in novels.

To be honest, I would love to see a film that actually deals with the realities of love and sex......no, not about the wife who leaves her boring/impotent husband for a young stud and has amazing sex with him. I mean, a film that focuses on the actual aspects of romance and sex.

In my opinion, and this is only me speaking, love is overrated.


What do you mean? A lot of people have sex that way. I don't understand what you mean.



Aspie1
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02 Jul 2010, 7:55 pm

If you think about it, most romantic comedies follow this type of plot line:
Step 1: A man and a woman spend time around each other, but somehow, their relationship remains strictly or mainly platonic, when one day...
Step 2: Some shocking or unusual event happens, causing their feelings for each other to come bursting out like soda from a shaken bottle, and...
Step 3: They're reveling in their new-found romance until...
Step 4: The new couple has a fight of some sort, causing their nascent relationship to almost completely shatter apart (key word: almost), then...
Step 5: Somehow, they're brought back together by one or both partners apologizing profusely and/or making amends, and...
Step 6: Their relationship is back and better than ever; the end.

Almost every romantic comedy I saw follows this plot. Even Zack and Miri Make a Porno is like that, despite being hyped up as a sex comedy. No wonder it bombed at the box office; the producers lied to the audience and made it a love story. Pretty much the only romantic comedies I liked is You've Got Mail and Up in the Air. They follow a more realistic plot line, which makes them heck of a lot more enjoyable.



LegoMaster2149
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12 Sep 2017, 5:43 pm

Because Hollywood wants to obviously make it appear more golden and make men and women think that's what sex will be like for them.

-LegoMaster2149 (Written on September 12, 2017)



DW_a_mom
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12 Sep 2017, 6:27 pm

I don't think what you are looking for translates well to the screen. How do you get an audience involved in a quiet, knowing stare, or sharing the feeling of complete comfort, that everything is right with the world?

Part of growing up is realizing that love doesn't look like it does in the movies, and it should not look like it does in the movies. But the movies can still be fun, capturing that charge of energy and lust one can feel early on in a relationship, before the deeper love settles in. That charge is dang fun, of course; but one couldn't live on it. And, well, in real life it tends to come coupled with potential negative side effects, which we get to skip when watching on a screen.


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DW_a_mom
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12 Sep 2017, 6:30 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
If you think about it, most romantic comedies follow this type of plot line:
Step 1: A man and a woman spend time around each other, but somehow, their relationship remains strictly or mainly platonic, when one day...
Step 2: Some shocking or unusual event happens, causing their feelings for each other to come bursting out like soda from a shaken bottle, and...
Step 3: They're reveling in their new-found romance until...
Step 4: The new couple has a fight of some sort, causing their nascent relationship to almost completely shatter apart (key word: almost), then...
Step 5: Somehow, they're brought back together by one or both partners apologizing profusely and/or making amends, and...
Step 6: Their relationship is back and better than ever; the end.

Almost every romantic comedy I saw follows this plot. Even Zack and Miri Make a Porno is like that, despite being hyped up as a sex comedy. No wonder it bombed at the box office; the producers lied to the audience and made it a love story. Pretty much the only romantic comedies I liked is You've Got Mail and Up in the Air. They follow a more realistic plot line, which makes them heck of a lot more enjoyable.


Have you seen the Big Sick? Even though it follows a lot of the plot line, it is a true story.

Up in the Air isn't a romantic comedy. He got played.


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Canary
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13 Sep 2017, 1:18 pm

Pretty much everything in novels and movies is out of proportion, no? People want to believe life is exciting and grand, or at least pretend it is for a while.

I do love "slice of life" shows sometimes that are more real because I enjoy seeing something nice that's not all made up.



LegoMaster2149
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13 Sep 2017, 2:02 pm

Canary wrote:
Pretty much everything in novels and movies is out of proportion, no? People want to believe life is exciting and grand, or at least pretend it is for a while.

I do love "slice of life" shows sometimes that are more real because I enjoy seeing something nice that's not all made up.


I agree with you on that! ;)