Are men not as flirtatious as they used to be

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A lot of guys don't flirt because of technology, also because women's styles are not unique anymore - they all look alike, no individuality - it's like flirting with exactly the same girl all the time - very boring - AND especially, more guys are coming out of the closet due to laws, etc... they're flirting with other guys. I'm 50 and I will never forget how they were in the 70's. Yelling things out of cars at women like HOOCHIE MAMA!! ! etc... making sounds, whistling, jackass activities but funny as heck. That was the extreme of flirting. That was the 70's. OR another thing, they don't have to flirt because women have gotten so aggressive! BINGO!!
They've taken the role of the passive woman - lazy bast---s! Now, we have to do EVERYTHING!!

Moog, you do indeed have ideas! What you posted makes a lot of sense.

The sexual revolution made life too easy for guys. "Casual Friend Dating" is just "bangin' a friend".

See, that's a different issue altogether. The Why do girls date jerks? is the same issue as Why do guys like b--ches? In that, there is a psychological issue about self-esteem and control. People want to control someone, fix them, change them, and that stems from a need inside of them caused by someone like that who didn't love them and should have (ie parent). It's a pattern of behavior, almost an abusive cycle, of trying to "win" at something that's really impossible so they can prove to themselves (and the person who hurt them) that they are worthy of love. And, yeah, there are a lot of people like that.

Those weren't the people I was referring to in my comment, obviously.

I'd flirt more, but I don't want to be accused of being creepy.

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I'd also add that while many fathers are not failing in parenting , but they're failing big time in fathering (aka to teach the boys how to become men).

What is a man though?

In the oriental sense .... a man is an independent adult male who's strong enough to make his own decisions , who has a strong personality , who is not coward and who's ready to put his life at risk for the sake of women and children's safety.

I think it's the same for the western culture, just add chivalry to the above definition (opening the door and the like...).

This is a crucial question. If one gets into what determines a man, one must get into what determines a woman. Since too often these two things are poised as opposites, instead of mutually exclusive genders, we end up with a very cisgendered and bigoted mindset. Logically, one would think that aspies and auties would be the first people in line to refuse strict definitions of individuals into groups, signaling out anyone who doesn't conform as "different" or "abnormal".

My point is that women generally do NOT seem to go for nice guys so guys do not see the point in trying to friendly because they think women are not interested in that

Last edited by nick007 on 25 Feb 2011, 2:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

We're living in the age of divorce and single parenthood - not all of those scenarios are single moms but I believe the majority of them are. Boy's just don't have the role model in their life like they used to. Maybe they are latching onto the next best substitute - tv, videos, movies, equally clueless friends - and making it up as they go along. And girls are growing up with strong independant woman as heads of household taking their cues on what is desirable in a mate from the same sources as these clueless boys... I'm not surprised relationships are a dying breed.

And, as a woman, I do agree that the few-women-exceptions-to-the-rule who abuse harrassment laws are just making things worse for everyone. I do not condone the condemnation of ALL women because of the actions of these few but the damage these few have done is inexcusable. I've witnessed it which is why I side with the guys in this - to a point. I've watched women hoochy themselves up - when the hot guy flirts and makes eyes and gets in her personal space its fine but the unattractive guy - if he even so much as looks at her - she's ready to slap him with a lawsuit for harassment. If you're going to advertise, ease up when the customers come knocking! This in no way is meant to condone ANY unwanted physical contact - those laws are clear and, in my book, sacrosanct. But when you go fishing, you never can tell what is gonna bite on that hook. You need to toss alot of fish back into the sea until you catch the one you want. I just think women should be more tolerant, and plain old kind, to those she tosses back.

The mating ritual is already convoluted enough. Women need to lighten up on the guys reading their, sometimes, screamingly loud signals. And guys need to take a hint - even if she's hot and dressed to impress, if she shoots you down, you're not on her radar. Take the hint and move on. She hunting other game. Dragging this sort of thing into court only serves to drive a bigger wedge between the sexes.

Yeah. I understood your point and addressed it. You, however, are sticking to an inaccurate overgeneralized stereotype. Please reconsider my comment.

women do go for nice guys, just not self proclaimed 'nice guys'.

I'd flirt more if I wasn't so damn awkward and nervous when talking to girls I like. I'm far better online though.

HAH, I'd like to know which women you are talking about. Maybe it's different where you live but that is not the case here. Here the females stay with the guys that beat them and I'm not exaggerating.

Maybe at first, but i've been there - there's only so many beatings a girl can take.
I'm stuck on my nice guy, and i'll never go back to the 'bad boys' again.