Does your country seem to have a bias against being single?
I usually get interrogated about guys from my family. "Do you have a boyfriend yet? When are you going to get married? I want grandchildren!" Yes, my mother and grandmother were already married by my age. That's great for them. I'm just not capable of maintaining a relationship like that (apparently) as the guy always seems to find a reason to not see me anymore after a few months. Now matter how hard I try, my relationships fall apart.
1. The lack of a successful relationship is not entirely your fault, so don't blame yourself.
2. Don't try to make just any relationship work. That will pull you deeper into a relationship that will last longer than it should. Instead of going out and finding a guy that's right for you, you'll end up spending more time with a guy that you clearly aren't meant to be with. This will only hurt you emotionally and psychologically as well as prevent you from finding the relationship that you should be in.
_________________
"Let reason be your only sovereign." ~Wizard's Sixth Rule
I'm working my way up to Attending Crazy Taoist. For now, just call me Dr. Crazy Taoist.
2. Don't try to make just any relationship work. That will pull you deeper into a relationship that will last longer than it should. Instead of going out and finding a guy that's right for you, you'll end up spending more time with a guy that you clearly aren't meant to be with. This will only hurt you emotionally and psychologically as well as prevent you from finding the relationship that you should be in.
But I'm 50% of the relationship so statistically it has to be my fault to an extent, even though I have no idea where I f**k up. I usually presume they find someone prettier than me and make up an excuse to dump me. So I'm in process of losing 100 pounds so I can be pretty too, I've lost 30-ish so far.
That's the thing, I get that feeling that I should be with that person but something always happens to take them away. Either a possessive ex or their mother or them discovering that he's not "in the mood" for dating a woman right now. If he didn't want to date me, why did he ask me out in the first place? I also get into the mentality of, "I don't have anything else going on so I may as well be with this person." Not to mention that I just hate the time of year when all my friends have boyfriends and girlfriends and I'm left alone and none of them will want to hang out with me anymore. So I want to be able to have a boyfriend so I'll have someone to spend time with during that time. It's usually spring but my relationships tend to happen in the winter and end before the spring. D:
I am sure you will both find people, Erisad and Toad. ((((hugs)))))
Mr Loony gives good advice.
Anyway I realised over the last few days that I was feeling this pressure and sort of confusion over what sort of future I would be building for myself. I always thought I would be married by 25, and I think that the weirdness of that not happening was one of the big reasons why I travelled for quite a bit of my 20s, to escape my home town. Even now, I am thinking of moving to a bigger city, perhaps in a couple of years time. I think that it is very important to be in an environment where you are not in the minority.
_________________
"Caravan is the name of my history, and my life an extraordinary adventure."
~ Amin Maalouf
Taking a break.
False. Oh so very false. If someone drinks, say, .999 liter of (pure) water and 1 gram of arsenic, water makes up 99.9% of the mixture (by weight), but the arsenic is 100% responsible for killing them. The water shares none of the fault.
When looking at what kills a relationship, the same must be considered. If they are unable to commit, or unwilling to trust, or any of the many things that can poison a relationship, the fault lies with them.
In some cases, a relationship fails because the two people just aren't right for each other. In that case, it's no one's fault.
_________________
"Let reason be your only sovereign." ~Wizard's Sixth Rule
I'm working my way up to Attending Crazy Taoist. For now, just call me Dr. Crazy Taoist.
False. Oh so very false. If someone drinks, say, .999 liter of (pure) water and 1 gram of arsenic, water makes up 99.9% of the mixture (by weight), but the arsenic is 100% responsible for killing them. The water shares none of the fault.
When looking at what kills a relationship, the same must be considered. If they are unable to commit, or unwilling to trust, or any of the many things that can poison a relationship, the fault lies with them.
In some cases, a relationship fails because the two people just aren't right for each other. In that case, it's no one's fault.
Huh, I guess that makes sense.
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