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TeaEarlGreyHot
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03 Jun 2011, 1:26 pm

nick007 wrote:
Sorry if it sounded like I implied you didn't. How can someone know the difference between being obsessed & being in love? Or being in love & obsessed vs being severely obsessed without love?


That's a good question, but I really can't answer it. Being able to tell the difference depends largely on the ability to distinguish fantasy from reality and the ability to examine your own feelings and thoughts objectively.

Most people are capable of the first, but the latter is rather difficult.


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nick007
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03 Jun 2011, 2:17 pm

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
nick007 wrote:
Sorry if it sounded like I implied you didn't. How can someone know the difference between being obsessed & being in love? Or being in love & obsessed vs being severely obsessed without love?


That's a good question, but I really can't answer it. Being able to tell the difference depends largely on the ability to distinguish fantasy from reality and the ability to examine your own feelings and thoughts objectively.

Most people are capable of the first, but the latter is rather difficult.

That makes sense. I know the difference between fantasy & reality but I'm not sure about the objective examination part. I know I really like her, care about her & want to be with her but I know that that would be practically impossible & even if by some miracle I would actually have a chance; she would probably be better off without me. These feeling hurt a lot sometimes & I KNOW it seems crazy that I even have em :cry: I was worse years ago because I wasn't sure what was real & what wasn't sometimes


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TeaEarlGreyHot
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03 Jun 2011, 3:46 pm

nick007 wrote:
TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
nick007 wrote:
Sorry if it sounded like I implied you didn't. How can someone know the difference between being obsessed & being in love? Or being in love & obsessed vs being severely obsessed without love?


That's a good question, but I really can't answer it. Being able to tell the difference depends largely on the ability to distinguish fantasy from reality and the ability to examine your own feelings and thoughts objectively.

Most people are capable of the first, but the latter is rather difficult.

That makes sense. I know the difference between fantasy & reality but I'm not sure about the objective examination part. I know I really like her, care about her & want to be with her but I know that that would be practically impossible & even if by some miracle I would actually have a chance; she would probably be better off without me. These feeling hurt a lot sometimes & I KNOW it seems crazy that I even have em :cry: I was worse years ago because I wasn't sure what was real & what wasn't sometimes


I can't tell you how you feel about her, or whether it's at a healthy level or not. What I can say is working on your objective and critical thinking may help you work it out for yourself.

Also, if there's little to no chance of you two ever being together, it's best you refocus your energy on something that'll prove to be more fruitful. There's nothing worse than pining for someone you can never have.


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03 Jun 2011, 5:30 pm

Obsession and love/a crush are two different things although hard to tell apart at times.

When you can tell them apart you are onto something. I've recently learned to tell them apart.



nick007
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03 Jun 2011, 6:56 pm

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
nick007 wrote:
TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
nick007 wrote:
Sorry if it sounded like I implied you didn't. How can someone know the difference between being obsessed & being in love? Or being in love & obsessed vs being severely obsessed without love?


That's a good question, but I really can't answer it. Being able to tell the difference depends largely on the ability to distinguish fantasy from reality and the ability to examine your own feelings and thoughts objectively.

Most people are capable of the first, but the latter is rather difficult.

That makes sense. I know the difference between fantasy & reality but I'm not sure about the objective examination part. I know I really like her, care about her & want to be with her but I know that that would be practically impossible & even if by some miracle I would actually have a chance; she would probably be better off without me. These feeling hurt a lot sometimes & I KNOW it seems crazy that I even have em :cry: I was worse years ago because I wasn't sure what was real & what wasn't sometimes


I can't tell you how you feel about her, or whether it's at a healthy level or not. What I can say is working on your objective and critical thinking may help you work it out for yourself.

Also, if there's little to no chance of you two ever being together, it's best you refocus your energy on something that'll prove to be more fruitful. There's nothing worse than pining for someone you can never have.

Thinking too much was why I lost my grip on reality in the relationship years ago. I over-analyzed everything from so many angles that my rezoning kinda of shorted out & I had a hard time knowing what was an unlikely scenario theory & what was actually really going on.
Thinking heavily trying to analyze this now makes me depressed or angry.

I think I'm better off pinning over her rite now. The 1st time in my life when I was actually really happy was in that relationship years ago which had very little chance of working out then & the only other time when I really felt happy was after this crush/love/delusional obsession started. If this is all some kind of mental illnesses then & now, I do not want to be sane. I'm not sure what I should focus my energy on. Focusing on trying to improve my life situation has always made me miserable. I guess maybe I need something to hope & hold onto as some kind of escape because trying to live in reality makes me suicidally depressed. The only things I ever knew & been sure of in my entire life was that I truly loved Emily & that I really like Miranda now


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