No prospect of future GF = Get a prostitute instead?

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We met in church.

Not every woman is a prostitute, and not every man needs one - some of us are mature enough, smart enough, and not selfish enough to resort to sex-for-hire to satisfy our lust.

Never confuse sex with love.

It may sound simple, but it is not - like everything else in this life. Believe me, I know where you are coming from. I am a middle to middle high functioning autistic. I know that I won't ever get married myself, so I'm in the same boat as many other guys here. Please read the whole thing. There is some very important advice should you go ahead and decide to hire one.

If you do want to hire a prostitute, then you need to learn how to separate a vice officer from the real thing. Asking them, "Are you a cop" will not give you a straight answer in most states. This is because even though it may be against their laws to lie to a cop, a cop may freely lie to you. I don't recommend hiring prostitutes, but for those who do, I don't want them to end up on the (unconstitutional) sex offender registry.

Therefore, a more creative approach is needed. This involves asking her to do something legal such as a nude photo shoot (just make sure that it is legal in your area). Whatever you agree to, make sure that it is legal! In order to make a bust for solicitation, a cop has got to get you to proposition someone for illegal services. If she won't go along with your request, there is a good chance that she is a cop. Do not agree to, name a price, or ask the price of any illegal act. Doing so may get you busted.

Another option (if it is legal in your area) is to have a friend carry a radio scanner. engage the prostitute in conversation for a few minutes in or to let your partner check for wires. Most likely, a prostitute is not going to give you a list of services simply because she has to worry about cops as much as you.

Now, for the lecture. In many areas, up to 80% of prostitutes are HIV positive. Another deadly disease include hepatitis. In addition, there are plenty of non deadly diseases that can make your life miserable. Many of these cannot be cured by medicine. A condom does not eliminate the risk of diseases. It only reduces the risk. Many prostitutes are also drug addicts and may even use intravenous drug. Some may even try to rob or kill you or have a partner do that.

The prostitute is also someone's daughter and maybe a mother or sister. Hiring them enables them to continue their addictions (if any) for a longer period of time. In addition, some of them are trafficked sex slaves. A 12 year old girl can easily look 25 or 26 after a sufficient time on the streets and doing the wrong kind of dope. I really don't care if it is illegal. I have no respect for corrupt "law" or the court system. I do, however, care about right and wrong. Boning a prostitute is wrong and many of the reason why that is so is listed above.

If that is the only thing that is available, then he hasn't got much choice. I think is more to do with loneliness. Being with a prostitute almost certain
will lift the mood for a bit, maybe a few weeks. Loneliness can rob a person of happiness, I know some aspie( including myself) who doesn't even have the pleasure of having a nice drink on Friday because instead the alcohol making them happy, they become very depressed.

It probably a unpopular truth, probably nothing to do with sex or sex drive. I think some who has low sex drive but is chronically lonely is more likely to turn to a prostitute. Some of us, may not envy those in long term relationships, as sex does become boring but that does not guard against loneliness. Applying any logic to this isn't going to lift loneliness by itself.

I once thought to myself, hiring a prostitute cost the same as a vacation, but what is the point when loneliness spoils it. So if those who are thinking about hiring a prostitute and loneliness hasn't spoilt your life think about going on vacation instead as it lasts considerably longer.

You should post it in my original thread ...

Asian women??? I think that is a myth rather than truth...

I know this is sort of a lulzy type thread, but I can't help but think that going with prostitutes would screw up stuff in the bedroom down the road if you meet someone you actually like. Putting aside cost, potential of STDS, ect., prostitutes can and are sometimes willing to do a lot of shameless, humiliating things that other women (I hesitate to say normal) would be mortified by. This, of course, depends on the situation. I just think that getting used to such things would be damaging in the long run...

That... and this is just me... but I can't imagine letting another person see my body unless I trusted them completely... so prostitues = no. That is, if I was a male.

Prostitution has been practiced for ages now, its still legal in many countries. Just because its an illegal practice in the united states does not make it wrong.

It might be a good replacement to going out and trying to score one night stands, if you cant be bothered with that.
The club/bar scene is just one big platform to meet partners for sex. If you look at it that way a visit to a prostitute is the same as going out for several weeks because the average person only scores once every so many weeks.

Visit to a prostitute has no emotional connection and costs the same as going out for several weeks only you get instant gratification.

Going out is not an option for some aspies but the benefits (imo bothersome most of the time) are that you spend hours socializing with people which improves social skills and meeting new people. Also there is the potential for one night stands which still have more emotional connection than the prostitute but far less than an actual relationship.

Personally i think the chance for an aspie of meeting someone to form a relationship with is higher outside of the weekend nights. Its not that i think its impossible but more that i just don't think the majority of girls that like to go out would have much in common with aspies. Personally my number of potential partners is lower then my friends not only because i am an aspie but also because i have my own aspie conditioned standards on top of that. I am not interested in a long term relationship with the average girl.

Sex is considered a base need for humans after food,water, shelter etc. Personally i don't see a problem if you visit a prostitute but don't let it become a habit, because that might skew with how you go about relationships and bonding in the future.

I can see prostitution being illegal affecting the quality of the service for the worse, and the viewpoint that the general public has. Just like marijuana for instance its been around as long as alcohol and tobacco, its no less dangerous then those two but its the only one that is banned.

Last edited by TB on 18 Jul 2011, 5:33 am, edited 1 time in total.

You point to the (quite natural) biological 'reward' mechanism of sex, but ignore the natural (and wonderful) biological process of love.

Sex with someone you share a connection with > sex with whoever

I presume that's why we find prostitutes marketed as being able to offer a 'girlfriend experience', though I have my doubts about whether they can really replicate it faithfully.

I wonder if your view would be different if we lived in a world were NTs have a harder time then aspie by an equal degree.

Errrr! Why do most of you think that NT men have such an easy time at meeting women? They are not all Henry Cavill or Brad Pitt clones, and I've seen my NT male friends get rejected many times. I forget who said this but there is a hockey quote that goes something like, 100% of the shots not taken, don't go in (the net). Could it be that NT men generally put themselves out there more than Aspie men (despite past rejection)?

The OP is only 24, please don't judge your potential for finding a girlfriend and getting laid based on experiences had in highschool or even college. I am an attractive female and I wouldn't re-live highschool for a million dollars (maybe 2), it was horrible.

One thing to consider about the prostitute option is that it's kind of a huge turn off for girls to know that their significant other had sex with a cheap, dirty hooker. If you know for a fact that it's impossible you'll ever date or love a reasonable woman, then go for it but unless you live in or travel to a place where it is legal, then the pool of women is very likely to be drug addicted and not attractive. This is another reason that this is a turn off for future partners is that women like to feel attractive and knowing that a hooker did it for you could likely make her wonder how you see her.

There ARE women out there who dig shy, quirky guys, I swear!!

Where are they? lol

Anyways, the OP's problem might not just be him being shy and "quirky". He never said he's shy or quirky btw.

But the fact that he reached a such age with no gf prospect at all only indicate that there is something wrong in him or something wrong going in his life.

You're saying that he's lucky for not living trashy high-school relationships, yet you didn't think about the possibility of him being constantly rejected and feeling totally unloved and lonely during highschool, this is not an amazing experience as well.



Prostitution can only be a short-term solution for sexual needs and that's it, but also telling him to bury the head in the sand and pretending that there's nothing wrong would do no good, the best thing to do is self-improvement. So it depends on whether he views using prostitution as a mean of gaining confidence or just a mean to appease his sexual urges.

Yes, because sex is the most important part of life. Not personal happiness, friendship, and being comfortable with yourself, it's sex that determines one's quality of life. See how stupid that sounds? It's just thrusting and sweating. That's it. And this attitude of yours is what keeps your intimacy limited to prostitutes.

Seriously you guys, I know plenty of NTs that struggle with finding relationships and even more so with finding a quality relationship. It's difficult for everyone. If you think that prostitutes are your only option, then they will be as your low self-confidence will be obvious to everyone. :/

almost everyone does, that's true. the point is to aim for a relationship where neither party has to, as hard as it is in a culture like ours.

as to the OP, I think you should go for it. I'm only talking for myself but I'd much rather have sex with a guy who sleeps with hookers than with one who only masturbates to porn.

This whole "NT men have trouble getting relationships too!" is a straw man argument. No one's saying they don't, but they don't have nearly as much trouble as we Aspies do. I mean how many NTs do you think have NEVER been in a relationship? Whatever it is, the percentage for Aspies is higher.

Women want extroverted, domineering men, plain and simple. Yeah, it's easy for them to say differently on the internet, but I know what I see and hear in REAL LIFE.

Perhaps, but there's probably 500 shy, quirky guys out there for every 1 girl who's attracted to them.

*raises hand*

*raises hand*

Besides, who care if you have never had a girlfriend by a set date? Life's not a race and if you view it that way, it's not going to be very enjoyable for you. This is a realization I came to kinda recently so it's not like I don't know where y'all are coming from. But just because you have AS doesn't mean that you can't find a girlfriend. If you hide behind your diagnosis as an excuse to not try to socialize and improve one's own chances then the odds of having a girlfriend are low. I wouldn't have had a relationship at all if I didn't force myself to make new friends and ask a fellow out. I could have stayed in my room and complained about not having a boyfriend but that wouldn't have gotten me anywhere. The point is, just find something you like and enjoy life and then you'll catch people's attention. They'll see someone who enjoys life and be curious to whether he can enrich their own lives as well.