01 Aug 2011, 12:30 pm
Yeah, that is a skill, finding something interesting in the everyday mundane world. One friend of mine once suggested using the environment as a subject. For example these girls you mention, you might just ask them if they take the ferry often, which leads into where you're going, where they're going, and then becoming genuinely interested in them as persons by asking questions about them (not creepy questions like addresses, etc).
I remember once talking with a woman for about an hour regarding cheese...haha. We were at a ski lodge, but she worked at a high end cheese shop, and so I kept asking her questions about cheese -- which turns out IS quite interesting. But if you would have told me before this to talk to a woman about cheese as a way to strike up a conversation, I would have said you were daft, haha. However, in addition to cheese, I found out a lot about her, her aspirations (no she didn't want to sell cheese all her life, but would love to move into an artist's loft with a bunch of 21st century socialist-type friends, make art, drink wine and eat cheese), where she lived, views on relationships....etc.
So, yeah, perhaps making the individual you're talking to the 'interesting subject' as a way to approach your particular issues. Just a thought.
same here, I can talk to complete strangers as if they were my friends but it *has* to be about something. food is actually an excellent subject Asteroid! also good subjects: the weather, the bus schedule, the lazy b***h behind the counter (when stuck in a queue ;P).
as to the OP though - yeah I often surprise my friends, for some reason they just never get used to my quirks. every time they introduce me to a new person they later act surprised that I made no eye contact with the new person and just completely ignored them and not referred to them at all and looked at their shoes or over their heads if they started talking to me.
and they *always* tell me to "smile back" to guys. if there was a reason to smile, I would. I don't smile if I don't feel amused or somewhat pleased. and I know my fake smile and it looks terrible, so why should I scare people with it?
01 Aug 2011, 12:33 pm
TBH, I surprise them when I'm not socially inept. Everyone I care to interact with seems to get it without me saying so. Maybe I have "SOCIALLY STUPID" written in ink on my forehead?
01 Aug 2011, 1:32 pm
The_Face_of_Boo
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01 Aug 2011, 2:13 pm
01 Aug 2011, 3:47 pm
Yes!! !!
I know what you are talking with that experience. In certain situations i can find stuff to talk about, but just randomly like that would be hard for me.
My friends don't know I have autism though. And when I was on xc, I told my team because I was explaining a reaction to my coach...and most of them didn't know what autism was. 
01 Aug 2011, 3:52 pm
I couldn't go to my father's funeral and my sister, who was so understanding about our nephew who has social anxiety disorder, was so angry and resentful that I couldn't manage it. She really didn't get it. So now I carry one of these, just in case:
The_Face_of_Boo
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Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
01 Aug 2011, 4:07 pm
01 Aug 2011, 4:25 pm
01 Aug 2011, 5:18 pm
01 Aug 2011, 5:31 pm
wefunction, this is just pure brilliance. Sorry about your dad. I went to my dad's funeral and I think people were just dismissing my weird, inappropriate reactions as shock.
Fatal-Noogie
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01 Aug 2011, 5:34 pm
.
I've never been to a funeral of anyone that close to me, so I don't know what it feels like.
01 Aug 2011, 6:56 pm
exactly how are you planning to enforce the "no social sanction" part?
02 Aug 2011, 4:28 am
I wish I had not gone to my fathers funeral.
I was smiling / being really inappropriate the whole time. Never cried. And I was quite sad, loved the man more than anyone else in the world. But my face could not act sad, I really can not figure out why.
To this day so many people think I am a mean psychopath, but really my face is just to hard to control, and will do whatever it wants. So inappropriate, a 'friend' that was there still brings it up whenever I see her on facebook or wherever... 
02 Aug 2011, 7:54 am
I was smiling / being really inappropriate the whole time. Never cried. And I was quite sad, loved the man more than anyone else in the world. But my face could not act sad, I really can not figure out why.
To this day so many people think I am a mean psychopath, but really my face is just to hard to control, and will do whatever it wants. So inappropriate, a 'friend' that was there still brings it up whenever I see her on facebook or wherever...
I understand this perfectly.
I sometimes think that my life would have been completely different if my face worked a little better.
02 Aug 2011, 8:07 am
I was smiling / being really inappropriate the whole time. Never cried. And I was quite sad, loved the man more than anyone else in the world. But my face could not act sad, I really can not figure out why.
To this day so many people think I am a mean psychopath, but really my face is just to hard to control, and will do whatever it wants. So inappropriate, a 'friend' that was there still brings it up whenever I see her on facebook or wherever...
I've heard the "She laughs at totally inappropriate times. She's f*ckin' weird." behind my back. I was laughing because I thought that's what you do to be friendly! I have such a terrible time crying in front of people. My husband was really concerned about me after my dad died because I clearly depressed but wasn't crying. I was crying... just not in front of him. But I was too vulnerable to deal with ... any people... so there was no way I could even stomach the thought of going there with those people.
Your "friend" needs to get over it. The only thing worse than people not understanding why we're weird sometimes is people who love to relive it so no one forgets.
Fatal-Noogie
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02 Aug 2011, 1:01 pm
After I got my bachelors degree in engineering, I told my dad I didn't want to pursue a masters degree, and he laughed outloud. I didn't see what was so funny.
I think I could have gotten one if I had tried.
Another time, a friend told me an owl lived in a tree next to his house. I said, "Really? What does it look like?" He said, "Well it has a head and a body and looks like an owl!
" I'm a painter by hobby so that question was completely serious: it's our business to know what things look like FFS.—I was trying to determine if it was a barn owl or a great horned owl.
If a detective asks you "What did the robber look like?" Would you say, "Well he was a shady character who looked like a robber.
Hahaha!"
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