So who's really more desperate?

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mds_02
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23 Sep 2011, 9:29 am

Grisha wrote:
That's me for sure.

I'm sorry for my frequent whining binges, but it's usually in response to a specific recent rejection and it really does help me cope/get over it faster.

I try to be patient with others as well, as long as it occasional and they are otherwise trying hard to improve themselves...


I can't speak for others, but complaining doesn't bother me as long as the person is trying. It's only those who sit back, do nothing, and are surprised when nothing happens that I consider "whiners." If you're being rejected, that means you're trying, that excludes you from the "whiner" category.


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The_Face_of_Boo
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24 Sep 2011, 5:14 pm

mds_02 wrote:
Grisha wrote:
That's me for sure.

I'm sorry for my frequent whining binges, but it's usually in response to a specific recent rejection and it really does help me cope/get over it faster.

I try to be patient with others as well, as long as it occasional and they are otherwise trying hard to improve themselves...


I can't speak for others, but complaining doesn't bother me as long as the person is trying. It's only those who sit back, do nothing, and are surprised when nothing happens that I consider "whiners." If you're being rejected, that means you're trying, that excludes you from the "whiner" category.


But for a prolonged period, he would be seen as a whiner anyways, and probably a desperate.



Joker
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25 Sep 2011, 2:17 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
mds_02 wrote:
Grisha wrote:
That's me for sure.

I'm sorry for my frequent whining binges, but it's usually in response to a specific recent rejection and it really does help me cope/get over it faster.

I try to be patient with others as well, as long as it occasional and they are otherwise trying hard to improve themselves...


I can't speak for others, but complaining doesn't bother me as long as the person is trying. It's only those who sit back, do nothing, and are surprised when nothing happens that I consider "whiners." If you're being rejected, that means you're trying, that excludes you from the "whiner" category.


But for a prolonged period, he would be seen as a whiner anyways, and probably a desperate.


I think people that have low standards are desperate most of my friends that I went to school.

With where that way I do not fear rejection so if they say yes when I ask them out thats cool.

But if they reject me I dont b***h or whine about it that would be a major waste of my time.



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25 Sep 2011, 6:21 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I always wondered about the desperate stigma.

and I always wondered who's more of these men is more desperate for a relationship:

The one who takes the "asking out more than 10 to 20 women per month?" (in other term taking the "shotgun approach" , spraying shots at distance on a herd of ducks and takes whatever it hits),
Yet he appears confident, never whines , and always takes action? And this type of man often end up with a girlfriend because he keeps trying till he gets one.


Or the one who's very choosy with who to approach, because he has very specific standards of the woman he would like to have relationship with, but would often complains about not having luck or being unattractive? (and this type of man often stays single for longs periods because he asks few girls in his lifetime yet still waiting.)



Prolly the first one will have more sex... so as such would be less desperate to stick it in a female than the second who is holding out for Mrs Right



Surfman
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25 Sep 2011, 6:26 am

double post



Last edited by Surfman on 25 Sep 2011, 5:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.

mango_prom
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25 Sep 2011, 10:13 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I always wondered about the desperate stigma.

and I always wondered who's more of these men is more desperate for a relationship:

The one who takes the "asking out more than 10 to 20 women per month?" (in other term taking the "shotgun approach" , spraying shots at distance on a herd of ducks and takes whatever it hits),
Yet he appears confident, never whines , and always takes action? And this type of man often end up with a girlfriend because he keeps trying till he gets one.


Or the one who's very choosy with who to approach, because he has very specific standards of the woman he would like to have relationship with, but would often complains about not having luck or being unattractive? (and this type of man often stays single for longs periods because he asks few girls in his lifetime yet still waiting.)


I think your question is pretty much flawed on a very basic level. You oppose the concept of 'very specific standards' to the practice of 'asking out more than 10 to 20 women per month', which doesnt make any sense to me.
If you dont date them, you'll never find out if they meet your 'choosy standards'. That's actually no 'shotgun approach' until you decide to get laid by everything that crosses the street.
Actually, it's pretty reasonable to me: The more girls you meet, the higer the probability of meeting 'the right one' (if monogamy is the concept of your choosing) or just having a good time with a nice girl. Does that outrule high standards? Not at all!



MXH
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25 Sep 2011, 10:39 am

im more desperate.



Bloviater
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25 Sep 2011, 12:25 pm

I have trouble meeting women who are humble, honest and sane. And the ones who have all of those qualities are either taken, moving away soon or pregnant with another man's child. Must be this small town I'm living in. :x



The_Face_of_Boo
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31 Mar 2014, 2:42 am

**Thread Resurrection Spell**

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mango_prom wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I always wondered about the desperate stigma.

and I always wondered who's more of these men is more desperate for a relationship:

The one who takes the "asking out more than 10 to 20 women per month?" (in other term taking the "shotgun approach" , spraying shots at distance on a herd of ducks and takes whatever it hits),
Yet he appears confident, never whines , and always takes action? And this type of man often end up with a girlfriend because he keeps trying till he gets one.


Or the one who's very choosy with who to approach, because he has very specific standards of the woman he would like to have relationship with, but would often complains about not having luck or being unattractive? (and this type of man often stays single for longs periods because he asks few girls in his lifetime yet still waiting.)


I think your question is pretty much flawed on a very basic level. You oppose the concept of 'very specific standards' to the practice of 'asking out more than 10 to 20 women per month', which doesnt make any sense to me.
If you dont date them, you'll never find out if they meet your 'choosy standards'. That's actually no 'shotgun approach' until you decide to get laid by everything that crosses the street.
Actually, it's pretty reasonable to me: The more girls you meet, the higer the probability of meeting 'the right one' (if monogamy is the concept of your choosing) or just having a good time with a nice girl. Does that outrule high standards? Not at all!


Not sure if you stay alive, but what's in bold is stupid, that would only apply for online dating perhaps but in real life you can learn a lot about some person without dating her.