Narcissists are attractive

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It's my understanding that the true narcissist can't stop being a narcissist - it is an insidious personality disorder over which the sufferer has little or no control. Even with treatment, the prognosis is not good.

It's a horrible fate if you ask me, but I suppose it's not so bad for the sufferer as long as they can be successful at twisting the world to suit them.

Those people deserve sympathy, but the nature of their problem definitely makes it difficult...

You all seem to truly hate narcissts. I'm asking myself how many of you wrote their messages here "only to get attention".
I'm doing so. I'm totally true about it. I'm writing here because I want others to write back, I want to add my input. Because I of course need feedback. Constantly. Of course narcissts are worse. I don't like them too, so... who cares^^ I just somehow believe that they are right and we are not, since they really want to be better than otherones and act this way so their chance to become better will be much bigger than otherones chances who are satisfied with what they have.

why are you gossip
say it to my face or don't say anything

I've always attracted the most beautiful, intelligent girls and I'm a barely functional, weird looking, unemployed autistic. It's because I've always fundamentally known that I'm God. Any room I go into, I know I'm the coolest under pressure. Girls dig that. Narcissism is an elegant counterweight for many autistic disadvantages, I've found.

I think you are confusing some traits.

Some attributes in the vein of what you describe can be listed as follows:

- Attention whore
- egotistical
- Arrogant
- "know-it-all"
- Narcissist
- Power Hungry

All 6 of these ideas are distinct and seperate from each other, but have some similar characteristics. You might think to have ego means to be narcissistic, but this isn't true. While narcissism is a strict and rigid form of ego involving an immense love of self while rejecting many external stimuli not related to one's self...most forms of egoism have nothing to do with narcissism.

The reason narcissists are bad is due to that rejection of the exterior world in favor of hypeing one's self to predominant status. A narcissist will not care if he destroys the lives of others in order to advance his love of the self. In fact, he will believe it justified. Thinking that he is essentially the equivalent to 'god's gift on earth.' A narcissist believes himself in effect superior to everyone else, and all other rules.

It's essentially a form of insanity. They are incapable of living in reality. They live purely in delusion. It is perhaps the single most destructive trait in all of humanity.

I was married to a narcissist. To date, it is the singlemost worst mistake of my life. I cannot say that emphatically enough. I was not attracted to his narcissism, rather his narcissism allowed him to fake a personality long enough to become someone I would be attracted to. I think that's an important distinction.

Narcissism is very sad and repulsive.

Yes, I agree with Grisha. Furthermore, their rejection of anything that does not reinforce their own narcissism makes treatment difficult to administer.

Please understand, everyone who's throwing the word "narcissist" around, that true narcissism is not self-love. It's self-loathing or enforced self-negation that is so profound (usually due to inborn traits reinforced by parental emotional abuse) that the narcissist has to build a defensive shell around him and fill it with delusion. The need for attention, for validation, for reinforcement and aggrandizement is NEVERENDING and BOTTOMLESS. It's sociopathy. I would feel sorry for these people but they do nothing but leave destruction in their wake. Always.

Problem is that you have to have the right charisma to be able to pull something like that off. Because if you think you're funny but come across as a creepy old letch, that isn't funny. Constantly making jokey sex references to other people's wives isn't "cocky and funny", it just makes you look like a twat.

I've been accused of being narcissistic a lot on other forums before & women were never interested in me on there but I'm not really narcissistic thou & I just came off that way because I posted a lot when I was frustrated & people misunderstood so perhaps some women only go for actual narcissistic guys instead of autistic guys who appear to be narcissistic

Think you're mostly right. Narcissism is hot. Though that's not my opinion, it's just CONSIDERED hot, with the amount of 'f**k you' in someone's personality and the amount of 'irreverence' in their personality. It's probably more confidence than anything though, people having more confidence than anything that they're attractive.

I'm not Mak, and the father and mother in question didn't give birth to me as I'm adopted, but otherwise my situation is similar.

i do not like narcissists. they have an opinion of themselves which i do not agree with, and they are prone to waste their energy in delusions.

i like to spend the end of my day by myself because only i understand what happened and how it impacted me during that day.


i am autistic.

"narcissist" is one of those words that gets thrown around way too frivolously - like "addict", "stalker", "obsessed" etc

No-one, male or female, goes for truly narcissistic people for long unless the have serious personal issues themsleves - narcissists require a constant stream of new people to replace the ones they've "used up".

I've know a few of these, both male and female - and you are far from being one...

grisha.

you display yourself as a wise and accomplished man.
i would not like to be like you because i would be bamboozled.
you crave endorsement. i do not. i do not care if no one else on earth thinks as i do. i still think what i think.

MV,

Sorry to hear that your ex was like that. My ex husband was a piece of work as well!

Yes, I definitely crave endorsement - I even started a thread recently about exactly that issue. I tenatively concluded that it's driven by my somewhat extreme social isolation.

I believe that everyone needs endorsement, it's just that many people get the required endorsement from family and friends, which is something I don't have IRL.

Feel free to ignore me if it bothers you, I really don't intend to annoy anyone...

I don't know, I've worked that angle to death and it hasn't done anything for me....!