"I Can't Believe You're Still Single!!"

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I get a variant that goes, "You need to find a nice woman."

Yup, that's the problem. Nailed it. Good work to all the amateur psychologists and love doctors.

Worse, the family member who says this to me the most f*****g knows I'm an aspie!! I know it's a well-meaning statement and is meant as a confidence booster, but holy s**t already . . .

The closest anyone ever got to saying that to me was a nurse at the nursing home where one of my grandmothers was. This was before internets. This nurse says to me as I'm leaving, "Why aren't you married yet?" This came as a complete surprise. I stopped short, stared at her like she'd lost her mind, and calmly said, "Who would I marry?" To me that question was better suited to people who are, you know, living together.

Other people know better than to ask me because they know the culmination of my life experiences pretty much dictates that nobody in the local area would approach me. This strange little town is really hard on Autistics (or me, anyway).

I hate that!! ! Its like they are trying to look for something that is wrong with you. (at least to me)

Generally, I only ever get this question from girls (guys, naturally, dont give two s**ts about other guy's love lives unless it involves banging models). Here's how this conversation goes with me most of the time:

her: "So why are you still single?"
me: "I've never met a girl that actually wanted me, and I doubt such a girl even exists. As far as I can tell, i'm unlovable."
her: "How can you believe that?! Surely there has to be someone out there for you?" (or something similar)
me: "Well, since you're expressing such a deep interest in the subject, I would like to inform you that the position is, indeed, open. Would you like to volunteer?"

*awkward silence*

her: "...i have a boyfriend" (or occasionally an extremely awkward "no it's okay" followed by her backing out of the conversation awkwardly if I know for a fact she doesn't have one)

There is the added benefit that I only have to engage in this conversation once, and it's a fairly standard form script to follow, so I know exactly what to say.

Oh, and the best part? With some slight modifications, it can be used to shut down any kind of "why dont you" questions along that line (I use a variant when dealing with some volunteer coordination stuff. If people criticize my efforts, I tell them I'm always looking for volunteers. People are so hesitant to put their money where their mouth is, and will often retract rather than commit.

WAIT!! !! i was just thinking! have you seen the new series of dating threads over in Indepth Adult Discussion? they are focused on people over 40, but i figure i'm close enough in age to contribute. you should definitely check it out!

this is the index of threads. they are still new, but the more people who contribute, the more hopping the place will get:

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt179273.html

and LexF might want to check it out too (and anyone else who wants to), if he is around that age - which i don't really know because he has skipped answering that question twice

Hmm, a good counter, I would adopt it and say it to any single girl who tells me such thing.