Mail Order Brides

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25 Feb 2012, 10:31 am

Wolfheart wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

it is considered a form of human trafficking and i am surprised it is legal.

A foreigner can't claim benefits in the UK unless they have worked for 12 months and payed tax, some may live in the country with someone else and do house chores until they find a more permanent position.

Not everyone does it for sexual reasons either, I know one man that took in men from Eastern European countries, gave them accommodation and food and had them do certain house chores until they could find a more permanent position or get on their feet.

Some of the guys are very lonely & have horrible luck finding companionship like me..

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Ohh, there's a one site (I swear I would look drop-dead gorgeous there):

http://mailorderhusbands.net/order/

Happy hunting, ladies ;P

I would be one if I thought I would have a chance. I HATE living here & am very willing to relocate for my partner.

Her family wouldn't be much of an issue if she doesn't have one or doesn't have a good relationship with them. Her parents would probably like me because I've been told by a lot of older people I've known that they wish their daughter or granddaughter would be willing to give me a chance. My ex's parents really liked me after they met me & her dad has issues & hates everyone. Maybe I could have a better relationship my potential hypothetical bride's family than mine. I've known a couple guys on a forum for mental issues who had success with the mail-order bride thing. One of em used some agency. They chatted online a while before they met up. What I would be most concerned about is scammers

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NorthPark
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25 Feb 2012, 10:37 am

Seroiusly though, I wonder what's next? Kids?!?!

Anyways, the fact that the bride that I bought only wants me for green cards is saddening. Whether it is that I bought one online (which will never happen) or met one in the real world, I feel angry when I find out when she is divorcing me after getting her a green card. Luckily, this never happened to me before.

This is why I try to steer clear from prospective GFs/ wives (don't tell me I'm too young, I know that) who I know are born in a third world country, unless of course, I know we're in love. Because I am a first gen. Latin American, it is easier said, than done.

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NorthPark
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25 Feb 2012, 10:40 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Ohh, there's a one site (I swear I would look drop-dead gorgeous there):

http://mailorderhusbands.net/order/

Happy hunting, ladies ;P

The pictures there made me laugh. The last one said HALF PRICE :ROFL:

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ValentineWiggin
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25 Feb 2012, 11:01 am

Tequila wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

it is considered a form of human trafficking and i am surprised it is legal.

If the person consents, of course it's legal.

What does "consent" mean in a situation of economic destitution wherein one's survival is in question?

And since when is "consent" the central imperative of legal codifications?

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25 Feb 2012, 12:12 pm

ValentineWiggin wrote:

Tequila wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

it is considered a form of human trafficking and i am surprised it is legal.

If the person consents, of course it's legal.

What does "consent" mean in a situation of economic destitution wherein one's survival is in question?

And since when is "consent" the central imperative of legal codifications?

That's perception. If we apply that same logic to a couple in America; terms like gold-digging & sugar-daddy get used

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25 Feb 2012, 12:46 pm

ValentineWiggin wrote:

Tequila wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

it is considered a form of human trafficking and i am surprised it is legal.

If the person consents, of course it's legal.

What does "consent" mean in a situation of economic destitution wherein one's survival is in question?

And since when is "consent" the central imperative of legal codifications?

I guess that's a good way of looking at it, I have never thought about it like that.

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25 Feb 2012, 1:27 pm

I think the distinction on consent comes in that you make an additional option possible. And the person that is offered to make a choice can still choose to continue as before.
You have the same "choice" for an unemployed that is offered a job.

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25 Feb 2012, 1:56 pm

Tequila wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

it is considered a form of human trafficking and i am surprised it is legal.

If the person consents, of course it's legal.

when the options are:

-get sold into sex slavery
-become a mail order bride

the choice is obvious. consent is hard to prove.

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25 Feb 2012, 2:04 pm

hyperlexian wrote:

Tequila wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

it is considered a form of human trafficking and i am surprised it is legal.

If the person consents, of course it's legal.

when the options are:

-get sold into sex slavery
-become a mail order bride

the choice is obvious. consent is hard to prove.

'
Are you implying that all women who chose to be mail-order brides are going to be sold into sex slavery if they don't?

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25 Feb 2012, 2:09 pm

ValentineWiggin wrote:

What does "consent" mean in a situation of economic destitution wherein one's survival is in question?

You could say that about many things. Life is often hard for many people in poorer countries and they have choices to make. They understand that these choices are not ideal but that's life for them.

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25 Feb 2012, 2:13 pm

Tequila wrote:

ValentineWiggin wrote:

What does "consent" mean in a situation of economic destitution wherein one's survival is in question?

You could say that about many things. Life is often hard for many people in poorer countries and they have choices to make. They understand that these choices are not ideal but that's life for them.

Would people feel as negative if it was a girl living in the slums in America who was dating a rich American guy? because I really do not see a difference between that & the mail-order bride thing except people being in different countries.

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25 Feb 2012, 2:19 pm

nick007 wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

Tequila wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

it is considered a form of human trafficking and i am surprised it is legal.

If the person consents, of course it's legal.

when the options are:

-get sold into sex slavery
-become a mail order bride

the choice is obvious. consent is hard to prove.

'
Are you implying that all women who chose to be mail-order brides are going to be sold into sex slavery if they don't?

not all, but many. did you read the link i posted? here is another one:

http://www.childtrafficking.com/Docs/la ... cking_.pdf

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25 Feb 2012, 2:53 pm

Tequila wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

it is considered a form of human trafficking and i am surprised it is legal.

If the person consents, of course it's legal.

If the person consents doing it of there own choice then its a form of debt bondage.
Anyroad debt bondage is still a form of illegal slavery

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nick007
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25 Feb 2012, 2:57 pm

hyperlexian wrote:

nick007 wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

Tequila wrote:

hyperlexian wrote:

it is considered a form of human trafficking and i am surprised it is legal.

If the person consents, of course it's legal.

when the options are:

-get sold into sex slavery
-become a mail order bride

the choice is obvious. consent is hard to prove.

'
Are you implying that all women who chose to be mail-order brides are going to be sold into sex slavery if they don't?

not all, but many. did you read the link i posted? here is another one:

http://www.childtrafficking.com/Docs/la ... cking_.pdf

I skimmed over the link.

I don't like the generalizing & judgmental attitude in this thread. Maybe we are thinking & talking about different things. I do NOT think of buying & selling people when I hear the term mail-order bride. I think of something kind of like international relationship; the woman is planning to relocate before getting in the relationship & they take the relationship at a much quicker pace instead of waiting for love to happen before they get married. Where exactly is the line drawn between a mail-order bride & international dating?

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25 Feb 2012, 3:10 pm

you're not thinking of it in terms of actual reality, though. skimming the links isn't going to bring you closer to the truth about mail order brides. even just try googling the phrase "mail order bride human trafficking" to look for current research.

international dating is... international dating. mail order brides (or husband) is buying a human.

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25 Feb 2012, 3:37 pm

MagicToenail wrote:

Marrying an NT of another culture will be just as challenging, if not more so, as an NT of your own culture. I have no idea about Russian or Phillipino attitudes towards Aspergers, but you should research that before taking a mail order bride.
Your bride may be understanding, but her culture and family might not be.

A friend of mine in Russia is quite understanding about Aspergers, though admittedly she didn't know much about it.

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