psychegots wrote:
I feel for you mate. Truth me told I get the impression that she is using you as support without any considerations for your feelings.
That's what I thought too. She was being a tad emotionally unfaithful to her boyfriend by talking to you, a potential sexual rival, about her problems with him. If he knew that was going on, it could have contributed towards them splitting up. If you'd then started a relationship with her, she'd likely have been talking to him about your problems if you went through a rough patch with her. Equally, knowing she was messing with another man might have finally galvanised him into making a claim on her......I don't want to read too much into the info you've given. but some women do tend to dangle rivals in their partners' faces just for the attention and for reassurance of their partner's commitment. I think it's a dirty game and personally I wouldn't entertain a relationship with anybody who played it.
But it's also likely that she's just too inexperienced to know much about these things, and didn't know anybody else she could talk to. And not everybody believes in the same standards of emotional fidelity as I do. It's not necessary to have such restrictions if the people are just dating, because that's really just platonic friendship (although there may be a hope for more than that later), but I think that once things get sexual, strong bonding happens, and feelings also become a lot stronger, and certain rights of mutual ownership tend to be assumed.
I'm suspicious that she says she didn't know how you felt about her. If I was doing with a female virgin what she was doing with you, I'd be very mindful that it could easily be taken as sexual interest, and I'd be concerned about her feelings if I got off with somebody else.
I'd leave her to it if I were you, and free myself up to find somebody with fewer complications in their love life.
15 Mar 2012, 6:07 am
