don't know anybody would want to date me ...

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Joined: 25 Feb 2006
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Location: Lancashire, UK

07 May 2012, 11:24 am

Oi! Don't undervalue yourself. If you do, you're telling her that you just aren't good enough for her and she'll leave you. Making you feel even more miserable.

Listen here, dumb fool (sorry, taking on a bit of Fred Phelps there): there are more than enough people in this world who will be more than happy to abuse you, insult you, hurt you, diminish you. You don't need to do it yourself, OK? I have my own problems with this too, but don't make this mistake. You'll hate yourself for it, alright?

Are we settled? Good.

Tequila
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07 May 2012, 11:29 am

Frieslander wrote:

Well, she is quite heavy... sometimes I think I don't find her attractive because of that.

Many of the sexiest women around are chubby or even just plain fat. Mmm...

bruinsy33
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07 May 2012, 1:12 pm

Frieslander wrote:

... but someone almost almost seems to want to. Amazing. She is very beautiful, very kind, and she somewhat thinks the the way I do (we understand each other pretty well, at least) but does not have Asperger's or any other ASD. (She does, however, have depression, which is treated well as far as I can tell.)

She knows I don't have a car, a job... all that stuff... including that I an ASD (PDD) which involves an element that is like having an early-in-life schizoaffective disorder, and she seems o.k. with it. I don't see all that much good in myself, except that I'm a pretty nice person--if I'm allowed to say that.

Not having a car or a job are things that can be turned around in a hurry.I am sure many women would be turned off by that but this one doesn't seem to be.I don't think you should talk too much early on about what you feel are your issues[AS],just relax and have fun.

Frieslander
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07 May 2012, 6:00 pm

curlyfry wrote:

Frieslander wrote:

Well, she is quite heavy... sometimes I think I don't find her attractive because of that. She has a beautiful face, though.

And Boo: we already had an almost-date: we met at a coffeehouse and sat and talked for about 1.5 hr. We text and talk "all the time".

That coffeehouse meetup sounded like a date. If you feel a connection with each other be happy.

She did pay for her chai latte. I was running a little short that week, and we had a little 'discussion' online about who would pay. Some girls don't like guys to pay whatever is bought on the first meeting; others would prefer or even expect it. I guess I don't feel like sharing the exact details of the conversation, but agreed to it and said I was "gentlemanly".

And, thanks, curlyfry, overall for the message.

curlyfry
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08 May 2012, 6:34 am

^ I don't think it matters who pays. Plus you talked about it before hand. I agreed to pay for the meal since they are traveling to see me and gas is expensive.

Frieslander
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11 May 2012, 11:26 am

I think a kiss (on the second "date") means I'll deactivate my okcupid account

mv
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11 May 2012, 11:27 am

Way to go, Frieslander!! !! I wouldn't deactivate just yet, just check it less often...

Frieslander
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11 May 2012, 11:29 am

mv wrote:

Way to go, Frieslander!! !! I wouldn't deactivate just yet, just check it less often...

Means a lot to me, at this stage. I can reactivate easily enough.

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