I don't want to have kids!

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I decided when I was 8 years old that I would never marry and never have kids. I am now in my eary 50s, and never did either one. I have always been fine with my decision, and am convinced it was the right one for me. I am also in no doubt that I would have been a terrible wife and mother anyway, so it worked out for the best.

However, many people who make such a decision at an early age, do eventually change their minds over time. That's okay too, if you are changing your mind for the right reason. Don't eventually have kids due to outside pressure. On the other hand, if you do eventually want them by your own choice, that's fine.

Until such a time as you should choose to have kids, use abstinence or use protection if you should have sex.

I don't hate kids, but just can't handle the stress of taking care of them. Also, I don't have any mommy skills. However, the only times I am really bothered by kids is if they are too noisy, or really misbehaving, or running around too much and getting underfoot. Of these the worst is misbehaving. I am willing to put up with the happily playing, noisy little kids in my trailer park because I remind myself that the alternative might have been for me to be living in a lousy neighborhood with gunshots all the time, druggies, drunks, and muggers, too. I'll take the happily playing tykes over the bad neighborhood risks anytime, even if they do get a little too noisy sometimes. Besides, I was kind of noisy as a kid, myself.

Enjoy your choice, and don't fret over people who insist you will change your mind, or who keep asking when you will get married and when are you going to have kids. If you do start feeling ticked off at someone who has already asked one of these questions more than once, just throw it back at them (nicely) by asking them why they need to know. If that doesn't work, start asking them (sounding as nice as possible) personal questions, like:

- Did you pay your taxes yet?
- How much do you earn a year?
- Do you have any STDs?
- Do you drive drunk?

I'm sure you can think of other such questions. Hopefully, this will get across the message that they are being rude. You should only try this on individuals who make a habit of repeatedly asking you personal questions. Once they know you will do the same to them, they will probably stop, and may even take to avoiding you.

You are still young, so there is no hurry to make a final decision on marriage or kids yet. Enjoy your youth--you will only go through it once.

I am a music teacher with over 400 students and in my mid-30's and don't want kids and never have. I didn't have a very good childhood in my own family because they didn't treat me well and as you all know, these patterns repeat. They still don't support me very much and why would they if I had my own kids?

It's also instinct...I think you know when you're a child that you want kids. The thought never crossed my mind to be honest.

Some of these comments in this thread are a little unbelievable. To the person who questioned how people could be sure they wouldn't hate "their brats", I have to say that if you, as a parent, hate your own child then something is severely wrong with you and the child is much better off being raised by someone other than yourself.

I love children but my boyfriend doesn't think he wants any. He is good with them, though - I hope one day he changes his mind but I'm not going to be selfish about it.

If you (general you) truly don't want or like children, then the best thing you can do for yourself and for everyone else is to be extremely strict about birth control to ensure you never, ever accidentally reproduce. I grew up hated and unwanted and psychologically/emotionally I will never recover from that. All children should be wanted children, not accidents or burdens.

I definitely agree. I hate kids and want no part of them in my life. One of the few positives about being alone is never having to worry about them. The world is overpopulated as it is and I never want to contribute to that.

Up until a few months ago I never wanted kids, nor did I ever want to get married. Now, while I am not a baby crazed lunatic, I think that if the right guy asked me to marry him I would probably say yes, and if I had children with him that would be cool too, but I'm not gonna put my life on hold for it. I have too much to do. And I worry about passing health problems on to them. It's quite a big decision.

Good, the world has an overpopulation problem anyway.

My original reply to Kaelyn's post was written with optimistic intentions. It's kind of like when I try to give posters hope when they write things like, "I'm short or fat or ugly and will never get married" or "I'm an aspie so I'll never have a normal productive life" or "I'm stupid so I'm doomed to failure" or "I'm not talented so I'm worthless." That sort of thing.

good, I see it as nothing more than a ego booster, something to mould and shape into something that wont turn out the way you want it to any ways.

Are their any other resons why people have kids?

Most people should just adopt a pet at the RSPCA , or may be it's just me ?

Having kids is an optional choice and thank God for that. I don't want to have kids either unless I can find a really good woman.

When I was mid-to-late teens I didn't want to have kids because I was too worried about getting fat and getting stretch marks (I was bean-pole skinny despite eating all the freaking time and I wanted to stay that way). When I was early twenties I didn't want to have kids until I was married, but at least I got over the whole image thing. I'm still not married, not as skinny as I used to be, but trying to get more in shape now, and really feeling the pangs of not already having a teenager by now, and therefore already well past the whole "baby" part of things. I'm still perfectly capable, but I no longer hold out hope either way. I've been in plenty of wrong relationships and to have procreated with any of them would have been a mistake. I now enjoy the random company of my three rambunctious nephews., and the best part about it is that as the Bestest Aunt In The Whole Wide World, I get to send them home when I've had my fill of them.