Is it a bad idea to date someone who is 18 years older?

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Yes, if it comes to that, I definitely will.

My last ex was 17 and a half years older than me. My husband is 10 and a half years older. Would I still do it if we were separated or divorced? I can't imagine having a baby with someone who is in their mid 40s and I am in my late twenties. I am done with having kids by the time I reach my 30's so I hope to have another by then or I would have to deal with my husband having kids in his 40s. My dad was 40 when my brother was born.

My husband is a daddy figure. I think that is why we were a match. He doesn't mind having another child. But it bothered my ex he had one because I am an adult.

I would like to think age is just a number but when it comes to having kids, I cannot imagine because imagine being in high school and your dad is in his 70's and your mother is in her 40's or he is in his 60's instead and your mother is in her 40's. Mine were in their 50's when I graduated. Mom had just turned 50 then. But if people want to date older men/women, to each their own. I have to think logically that there is no harm, it's not hurting anyone so what's the problem? So I have no problem with it then when others do it and I did it myself.

My parents had a problem with my ex dating me because he was way too old for me they said and said he had to find someone older and date older women but yet my husband is ten years older than me and they had no problem with it. I wonder what if he was 15 years older or 18 years older? Would they still have an issue with it?

Well, it's settled. We've agreed to meet for coffee tomorrow. Sooner than I expected I guess, but I'm trying to be optimistic. Now there's just the matter of trying not to freak out, but then freaking out anyway. Please wish me luck because I will surely need it

Good luck! Let us know how it goes.

Good luck

When I was 19 I dated someone who was 18 years older than me. We were together for three years. It didn't work out, but it that was down to incompatibility that had nothing to do with age - unfortunately we were simply very badly suited. There were one or two raised eyebrows, but my family accepted him and his accepted me and the majority of my friends were open minded and able to see that I was happy. I don't regret having that relationship at all.

Try not to look too far ahead, just focus on enjoying your coffee and getting to know each other.

Yeah. Last year a man in his 40s or 50s approached me when I was alone in a shopping centre and said "have I seen you before?" and my reply was "really??? where? when? was it a few days ago?" but he didn't reply to those questions and instead proceeded to ask me whether or not I was free. I said I was free, even though I didn't really want to go with this man but for some reason when I'm under pressure I just blurt out the truth anyway. Anyway, I went for a drink with him (apple juice) until I had to go and he wanted my number but I couldn't think of an excuse so I just gave it. That afternoon I met a friend and described in detail exactly what had happened and my friend told me that his initial question was a pick up line and he just wanted me for sex. Later on at about 9pm I had a message from him on my phone asking if I want to go for a drink tonight and but I said no and he wouldn't take no for an answer at first but after 3 nos he accepted that it wasn't going to happen. I didn't realise... I thought he just liked me. I still don't understand. I wasn't even wearing revealing clothes. lol.

Anyway back on topic: I don't think it's a bad idea to date someone 18 years older than you. I have dated someone before with a similar age gap and there was nothing pervy or creepy about him; in fact now we're good online friends. I think it's worth it to give it a go, but like the others said: proceed with caution and go to a public area. In my opinion one should proceed with caution on any date, regardless of age.

I like the boobcam idea too.

edit: Oops I didn't read properly and missed the part where you said you had it settled. It's 5:25am Anyway good luck and stay calm. =)

I was always told-age is just a number-well I think that but others seem to put more importance into age and though there may be those who do not care-they may be superficial and care about other things that may be a deal breaker as to why it wouldn't work out or be interested in you.

Last edited by Radiofixr on 11 Jul 2012, 5:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I hope it goes well and as you get to meet him and know him better you'll see past the age gap and be able to decide whether or not you get on as people.

The brother of a friend of mine was in his mid twenties when he started seeing a woman in her late 40s. She was older than his mother and his parents weren't keen on the relationship at first, but as far as I know they are still together more than 20 years later.

To be honest, boobcam isn't a bad idea.
You'll notice if he's looking at your face or your hooters so you can decide for yourself.
Just make sure it's a static camera and it's facing the right way. Else you'll have a look of shock from the person opposite.

Well, so I've now officially been on my first date.

I'd say it went... all right. I didn't tell him about my AS but I told him I'm not good with eye contact, and he was fine with that. We talked for a while and there was nothing disastrous. However, I wouldn't say I'm incredibly excited about the whole thing. The age difference definitely wasn't the problem; I didn't even notice it once we met, and I wouldn't have any qualms about meeting other people of a similar age in the future. I didn't get any creepy impression from him at all. I just didn't feel, well, anything. I was rather surprised about this because I thought given what I know about him (he works as a composer, likes art and poetry, is well-spoken, etc.) that there would be some chemistry, but it just wasn't there. To be honest I felt like my mind was elsewhere the whole time, which was a little disappointing. I'd definitely continue talking to him as a friend because he seems nice and interesting, and we might go out again, but I don't really expect it to go anywhere at this point. I guess we'll see.

The best thing to come out of the experience is probably that it's given me a small boost in confidence. I'm not entirely convinced, though, because if I met someone for whom I felt something more, I might still get nervous and act like a blithering idiot.

I've also been asked out by someone else, although we haven't set a date yet. She's only in the area temporarily, though, so it's mostly just for "fun" and is unlikely to lead to anything.

I think the same way whenever I see extremely large age differences between couples But thats just me. My ex fiance cheated on me and left me for a 46 year old bi polar ex coke addict at the age of 22 and I was 21 at the time.Funny thing is it didnt last with her new partner and she simply went to another guy for 3 months I guess karmas getting her she was very psycho.

Whenever I hear that, I think of the movie "Without a Paddle".

Good to hear it went well.