Online dating tips for women

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There's reasonable insights there and don't be bashful as I served up an open invitation to dissect so don't worry about being "weird" or anything like that.

I know I've narrowed down the field a fair bit on my insistence of having similar interests and intelligence levels but I know from experience that is how I fall in love/experience attraction to someone - it's just the strange way my brain works I have to experience an intellectual attraction before anything else follows. Some one could be tremendously good looking and a very nice person but I wouldn't feel the spark unless the other things are true. So Mr Right can't really be anything else, but on the other hand it does mean I would give shorter guys a chance when perhaps some of my gender would not. Height to me is fairly irrelevant.

I will consider rephrasing and adding a few items to the suggested section though.

Thanks again.

When I read the old profile, I felt like, oh so she is a smartass, (she likes to show all her medals)

Why is my show lame and why are you shouting at me?

Is this a Ted Bundy type home?

It felt like work, it felt boring, and negative. I get what you are trying to saying, but I don't necessarily want to be reminded how this will turn out after 10 years.

It's a shame that you have to dumb yourself down, but if the person is interested he will get to know all about your achievements by asking and liking what he hears right?

Last edited by Stalk on 08 Oct 2012, 3:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Actually thats totally different to what I had intended to state there but seeing as that was my failure at humour, the reality tv thing will be removed. Just to clarify I wasn't stating I was going to shout at my partner or that I liked reality tv, but as its caused so much misrepresentation it's gotta go.

I am dyslexic which doesn't help and it's obvious that it mars my appreciation of how the text comes across to other readers.

There is also a dating website called "My Single Friend" which I haven't tried yet. One of my friends has met his wife on there. You have to get a friend to write your profile for you which I think would be worth considering.

I knew I'd come to the right place to ask for some critique. My NT friends are too worried about offending my feelings to really get to the nitty gritty. You'll find someone soon is a soothing sentiment but not necessarily helpful.

I think I liked the old avatar better because his face was right up close to the picture

advice depends on your desired outcome, do you want high quantity attention or high quality attention?

if quantity it's fairly easy, post some photos that show off your figure, flirt to the camera and make your profile sound as generically feminine and submissive as you can, post some interests/books/movies men in the demo. you're looking for seem to like but don't claim to have much knowledge about these things, ask for recommendations, because they'd surely know better than you, check that you're bisexual or looking for casual sex, have low self-esteem but don't talk about it, don't appear to have any expectations or standards (they might be intimidating)

if quality,

- post 3-5 pictures of yourself. they should all be well lit and show you "on your best day", at least one of each of these photos - headshot, full body in a flattering outfit, shot of activity/with friends, it helps if these are not self shots and okc has collected data that shows people look more attractive when pictures are taken with higher quality cameras

- post brief paragraphs that show of your personality, try not to be generic, include some possible topics of conversation, mention things someone could ask a question about - this will make it easier for people to have a real conversation with you, not just say "hey" or "ur hawt wanna f"ck" (your profile actually seems really awesome in this sense, I kinda want to hang out and have a coffee after reading it)

- Don't feel weird or apologize for looking for someone who will share or at least take interest in your passions, don't worry about intimidating men, if how awesome you are is a turn-off for them, you don't want them

- maybe try a few more sites, "my single friend" sounds interesting

Well if the online thing doesn't work out, then maybe instead of becoming some older guy's trophy, I could be your trophy-boy instead. You seem like a nice person.

I second all above advice.

My advice is to go okcupid instead if you want young men.

Besides, you didn't show us your pic: the most important element. That's ok, I say just go okcupid.

Instantly gives me the stereotyped image of a American that stays home with the TV with very few other activities and perhaps a non-thinker and obese too. Doesn't have to be so. But it sure sends that signal.

This is the headshot photo I use



I can't seem to get the image to come up but if you cut and paste the address above into your browser you should be able to see the photo. I don't think I look that scary.

If you are into fitness, perhaps a full body shot will help sell.

That's a nice picture and you're an attractive woman... but the common fear will be, "She's hiding her body - she must be fat."

(Yes, I used the dreaded, evil "F" Word!)

As base as it may seem, many good men can still be wary of, "what's she hiding?" So, yes, a full-body shot of some kind might be in order. Rest assured, I've done the same. (Heck, check out my profile if you want! "SeeThreePeeOh") ...though few responses.

Good luck out there!

I use this as my second photo but do you think I should have this as my main one?

I also worry whether my expressions look a bit awkward you know a bit off with the eye contact as I gather NTs are very sensitive to that.

I'd keep 'em both - they're both good pictures and catch your face in two variations of your smile. (I like people who don't have that plastic, practiced "monosmile" that's the same in every picture/circumstance!)
<- hubba hubba!

I would take a new photo without those reflection. It doesn't do your skin justice. It think a another haircut might improve, but that is something more of a trail-and-error process.

The second picture makes at least me more interested. It's makes it obvious the face has more colours and that you most likely have a slim body.

balletnerd, forget the context advice for now, your main problem is your photo. I think the users here have overanalyzed a bit (I don't blame them, there was no pic) - but c'mon, any female with a good photo (regardless how bad her profile is) WILL get messages (regardless of the quality).

As for the photos, your skin is weirdly glowing, I am not sure it's your skin or some face product you use (figure the problem and fix it), and those dark lipsticks are... too dark.

One more thing: You have hard overmatured facial features, you look older than mid-30s to me, so I was thinking: is it really bad to go for older men in their 40s? Not all older men would be like the one you dated, I think you should broaden your age criteria.

I personally think that the picture of just your face looks great, just a little small perhaps. The other picture though I think could use some work. I hope this doesn't sound rude, but since you invited criticism I think your smile seems huge in that picture, and that lipstick is pretty intense lol. You're certainly attractive, but I do agree that some better photos might up your success rate. If you have any big hobbies, "activity photos" never seem to hurt