Just came from a coffee date....

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The_Face_of_Boo
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03 Nov 2012, 6:37 pm

Shatbat wrote:

Looking good then.

Tomorrow probably arrived already over there.

it was postponed for tomorrow because she had a sudden work meeting.

No she didn't flake because she rescheduled it.

Adam82
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03 Nov 2012, 7:02 pm

I don't find the idea of dates very entertaining. Sounds more like a chore to me. It really shouldn't be so hard to just find someone you click with.

The_Face_of_Boo
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04 Nov 2012, 1:50 pm

Adam82 wrote:

I don't find the idea of dates very entertaining. Sounds more like a chore to me. It really shouldn't be so hard to just find someone you click with.

but in life it is.

I met the second girl, she's quite attractive, cute and very polite, yet very shy, she barely made any eye contact. I bet she's totally inexperienced in contrast of the first girl (maybe that's a good thing for an inexperienced guy like me) - she sounds to be a good wife material lol yet I don't know if she would tolerate my atheism, a subject that we didn't talk about yet.
To be honest, a too experienced girl makes me feel inadequate, something that liberal girls (my type) usually have...

IrishTusk
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04 Nov 2012, 2:09 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I don't know if she would tolerate my atheism, a subject that we didn't talk about yet.

Don't force your Non-Belief down her throat and ask her not to force her belief upon you and you really shouldn't have a issue. I mean, Why even bring it up? Unless she does avoid the subject or else it's like going "Oh yea, Do you know Religion? Yea that thing, I think it's BS. So how's things at work?"

Let sleeping dogs lie.

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AspieOtaku
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04 Nov 2012, 3:27 pm

Soo...how was the coffee? :coffee: Sorry I just love coffee!!

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AngelKnight
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04 Nov 2012, 10:57 pm

IrishTusk wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I don't know if she would tolerate my atheism, a subject that we didn't talk about yet.

Yup.

In general, I believe that tFoB would like to just have positions on religion be a non-issue.

However, I imagine it rears its head more often that Western Europeans or Americans are used to, because of the place where he lives.

The_Face_of_Boo
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05 Nov 2012, 2:51 am

IrishTusk wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I don't know if she would tolerate my atheism, a subject that we didn't talk about yet.

Don't force your Non-Belief down her throat and ask her not to force her belief upon you and you really shouldn't have a issue. I mean, Why even bring it up? Unless she does avoid the subject or else it's like going "Oh yea, Do you know Religion? Yea that thing, I think it's BS. So how's things at work?"

Let sleeping dogs lie.

What an immature approach to things, are you serious or you just like playing the brute jerk?

Besides, I didn't mention forcing anything nor that I want to bring it but the subject will happen sooner or later.

BlueMax
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05 Nov 2012, 3:10 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

That may be how some WP men are (it seems to be more the men shouting from the rooftops how much they hate religion and their followers are morons...)

We know you better than that, Boo - that's not your style.

(Besides - where you live, that could get you killed!)

IrishTusk
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06 Nov 2012, 4:51 pm

BlueMax wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

(Besides - where you live, that could get you killed!)

Firstly Aussie laddy. I wasn't hating on religion, Am religious myself, Sure not every sunday Religious but I believe.

The point I was trying to make was that when Boo/Hitch wrote

Quote:

I don't know if she would tolerate my atheism, a subject that we didn't talk about yet

makes it seem like he is already waiting for the religion dabate so he can point out he is Atheist, At least that is how it seems in my opinion. I was just saying avoid the subject with her unless it 100% needs to be brought up, If you keep thinking about it it will come up in conversation. And if your the one who brings it up just to make a point that your Atheist it'll seem like you did it just to tell her you think religion is a waste of time.

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Shatbat
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06 Nov 2012, 9:07 pm

The thing is, you should see where Face of Boo is coming from. I remember one of the biggest hurdles in his last relationship was that the other woman was a Fundamentalist Muslim, and that she would see the fact that he was an Atheist as a dealbreaker. And over there, there is no way to avoid the issue indefinitely, to give another example Boo doesn't observe Ramadan, so if other people noticed they'd ask him why, and so long for keeping things hidden. Religion is more of a big deal over there.

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The_Face_of_Boo
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08 Nov 2012, 3:19 pm

Update: things didn't go so well with the accountant girl after the date- she stopped initiating texting and barely replying, an obvious sign of disinterest (yet she's the one who gave me her nb).

things still going smoothly (and flirty and bit naughty) with the nurse girl tho (whom in fact liked her more than the other one) - so I didn't lose yet.

smudge
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08 Nov 2012, 3:50 pm

How do you know the accountant wasn't playing hard to get?

The_Face_of_Boo
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08 Nov 2012, 4:31 pm

smudge wrote:

How do you know the accountant wasn't playing hard to get?

because I am a blunt one who asks for explanation, she was appearing online just after I send her a text every time and wasn't replying, a behaviour which is 180 degree opposite than it was before the date (in fact, before the date she was initiating most of times and she replies quickly).

So I finally asked her "Why the sudden change of heart after the date? if you're no longer interested just tell me and stop wasting my time" - she replied that she just sees me as a friend and nothing more.

and even if she was "playing hard to get" (which I hardly doubt) then I am not obliged to play her game - I have a bigger fish to fry, a one who's giving me attention and being clear in her interest.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 09 Nov 2012, 2:02 am, edited 1 time in total.

Shatbat
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08 Nov 2012, 4:44 pm

Also, if someone "plays" hard to get, the usual best course of action is not falling for it amd waiting it off.

Nurse girl then. Sounds good~

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smudge
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08 Nov 2012, 5:18 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

smudge wrote:

How do you know the accountant wasn't playing hard to get?

I say the following with the best of intentions - I'm not trying to argue with you or put you down.

Some advice - that kind of response will make the other person feel as though you're too dependent on them already...as if you're already planning that you'll be together and like they owe you that. In other words, it appears you've grown attached to them too soon and that you're trying to make them decide too soon if they want you or not. People who are cornered are likely to try and escape. And, I think it's too soon to work out if you have an interest in someone after a coffee date. Making/asking (it appears the same) someone to decide too soon, stifles the attraction process.

You said she went online *straight* after you sent her texts? Perhaps she was ignoring you to see how you'd respond.

BTW, it's "playing hard to get", not "playing hard" on its own.

The_Face_of_Boo
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09 Nov 2012, 2:22 am

smudge wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

smudge wrote:

How do you know the accountant wasn't playing hard to get?

No, it was very obvious. She's the same girl who was used to tell me (before the date) "I see you online, why not talking me", or "with who you're talking with??" :lol:

(and on the whatsapp app there's no way to know someone is online unless you check their convo page) - it was a daily habit of hers that remained for two weeks, after the date she wasn't even replying, not even to a simple good morning/evening (and she was used to reply very fast).

So she was the one who was behaving too dependent (and totally ignoring after the date), that's why it was easy to figure it out.

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