Telling girls I'm an aspie - reaction?

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Never tell them, not now, not ever. Just look at ALL these threads created by wives/gfs who just found out (or doubt) that their partner has AS (well, in most cases their partners are jerks and their issue has nothing to do with AS or whatever), it usually doesn't end well.

Keep it as your greatest secret for life, maybe you can tell her when you're dying :p.

It would be far better to make them let you think of you as an 'odd' or weird that having this 'thing'.

Umm, I know my suggestion is too unorthodox here.

I don't mention it in the initial stages, unless she has it as well.

I told one crush once over dinner with her family. I got the weird reaction of all of them suddendly saying things like "ohh you must be good with numbers and dates huh? Cause you remember the day you came to the states and some other days" and just went over the whole possible list of "things im good at". I think id rather she just thought lol what a nerd fuckoff. But thats more me hoping i didnt have fallen for her

I have a personal story. I told people in my Developmental Disabilities class in college that I have Asperger's. I felt comfortable and like they wouldn't judge me for it. Same goes for my social work classes. I feel that people who are working in these settings will be understanding and accepting. I think I might be wrong now to believe that. One of the people who had spoken to me previously in the class completely avoids me now. Same goes for other people in some of my other classes. People don't seem to know how to respond to me anymore, even though they were fine initially. I guess it depends on who you're telling; if you trust them, then do it. It may not always work out how you think it might. Others who I've told are even more accepting and caring of me. The people who REALLY care, from the beginning, will not change their opinion of you in a negative way; they may respect you more. If their opinions change, screw them. They weren't worth the effort of befriending to begin with.

Just be yourself 1814. I met a guy who had AS and I didn't know. But I have an AS-dar and eventually suspected he could. So one day I asked him. He said yes he does and so do you. Turns out he was right and I was really thrilled he had it too because I then knew his quirkiness was exactly what distinguished him from every other boring man I had met along the years. So, if you feel like telling them...do. If you had told me those same words I would like you even more. A guy who isn't ashamed of his AS and is proud to say so? Ten out of ten from me.

this is a very complex question based on 3 factors
When you say it,
How you say it
and What kind of personality do they have.

the goal is to make sure there is enough trust that you can discuss it, rather then just mention it. i would hold off until after sex, since sadly it takes less trust these days to engage in sex than it does to talk about our feelings. let them get a very firm idea of who you are, then explain why you are who you are. if they are happy up until they trust you, then it will reinforce that trust. if there isnt enough trust yet, it pushes against their feelings breaking that trust.

how is not so tough if there is trust. i would first ask if they are familiar with autism (bring up movies they might have seen, Rainman or A Beautiful Mind are great examples here in the states). then bring up aspergers and how its different and how people with it can have it without being noticed. by now you should have a pretty deep conversation going. so then i would ask if theyve noticed any of my quirks. have a list of them ready that you are familiar with and comfortable with. like for me its that i talk fast or my mind wanders, or my odd jokes/perspectives on things. your list should be about who you are that make you interesting NOT disabled. and make sure you talk about how everyone is vastly different with their quirks and not to assume something if they go to research, but to ask about it.

and their personality might take it a few different ways. someone might end up being more nurturing. they would look at everything and question if you would like it, or they would watch you more closely to see if they spot other quirks.
someone else might have been very familiar and then its just a question if they like you less cause of it. or someone would think of you as disabled and want to leave. these kinds of things are out of our control for the most part.

its good to remember that most people are good in nature and will try to be accepting. the trick is to have enough trust and to not shock them with it. the first time you bring up AS is like trying to go into a hot-tub with a girl. you dont do it on the first date and you dont throw them in do you?

hope this helps