36 and still single.

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tequila is it really necessary to quote every sentence ?

Tequila,
Thank you so much for your kind words you're very sweet you make me feel good about myself, thanks.
I just fish for whatever wants to bite my hook. I have always fished off banks until one day my brother introduced me to wade fishing. It is the BEST! I like to eat too. What do you like to do?

Shelby,
I know exactly what you're talking about. I see the bad people are capable of doing and are gonna do. I know to most it sounds kinda crazy but I really know what most mean people are gonna do. (That's why it had me puzzled when I couldn't see through my daughter's father's crap, but he is a sociopath and was FAKE)
When I was 20 I dated this guy M. He had an ex who was a fighter (I'm so a lover) and I had heard stories about her violent temper. She lived near me and tried to befriend me, or whatever she was doing, but I resisted. I didn't like her, at all. Anyways, she found out him and I were dating (a year after they had broken up) through my brother in law. I told my him, my sister and mother how she was gonna attack me. They all told me how I was so dramatic and negative and nothing was gonna happen. That night, I was leaving work and the psycho was waiting at the car dealership next to my work. She darted out and almost hit my car, chased me thru town, all the way to the police dept. The cops did nothing (they didn't see anything) and we went to his house. She pulled up there, we were still in car and we took off to the police dept there. She hit my car over 15 times around the police dept!! This is such a long story...I will sum it up. She continued to stalk me, I called cops everytime. If they didn't see anything there wasn't crap you could do. Finally after a year off this, I finally was allowed to take her to court and she was convicted of stalking me.

There are so many stories I could tell you where I just knew what someone was capable of, it makes it hard on me to be around people. I just really love nice people I wish I were rich, I would pass out money randomly to nice people.

And thank you for the info, I will definitely check it out!!

BlueMax, thanks my friend. Glad to be here!
Sorry/Glad you can relate to my story.
You keepin positive?

MissCAP,

Do you live in an urban or rural area? Are the people in your are more blue-collar/simple-task or creative/analytical?

I live in a rural area. The people are more blue-collar, for the most part.
I have never felt like I fit in here, in TN. Who knows, maybe it was just me the whole time.....hahaha

From what you said so far, I thought your area was going to turn out to be blue-collar, simple task oriented, noncreative, and certainly not innovative. I grew up in an Iowa hick factory town where many of the people are the flat land equivalent of the squeal piggy hillbillies depicted in the movie "Deliverance." Rural people aren't bad, but they are not compatible with our type of thinking. They are the people who learn how to do something and are satisfied to do the same thing over and over again for their entire life. To them, "there ain't no reason to does nothing no different" if what they do in the way they do it is sufficient. Those people usually do not have the best ability to communicate verbally. And the depth of their conversation is generally fairly shallow. Most the people in my hometown have lives that center around beer and cigarettes. Mind you, I like a beer now and then, but it's not an important daily part of my identity and existence. People who have are sort of characteristics are best around others who are good, knowledgeable, and verbal communicators. When I worked as a consultant I traveled many places. I was a good fit in some, a not so good fit and others, and a terrible fit in the rest. Does that sound a bit like your story?

I found out the way you did when my child was evaluated also. I thought not caring about being social was a choice nothing more. Funny how you said your active in your child's school but when they found me and my daughter had AS they didn't want me to volunteer or chaperone anymore. I get asked questions like what's wrong? Are you angry? Are you tired? The more social they are the more nosey they are too. I also didn't know monologuing was out of the ordinary because everyone seemed to humor me. When I was mid 30's I found a book at the library titled "How to win friends and influence people," I learned how to finally converse easily with anyone.

I was single for 10 years after divorce but have found someone so it is possible. I actually didn't figure on looking again until I found out there were others and what I should look for in characteristics similar to my own. My beau is a bit clingy but he celebrates my uniqueness instead of criticizing. It was not without it's bumps but at our my age you know what's worth working out and what's worth walking away.

^^ That's inspiring, Curly! Gives hope for all of us aging folks.

Funny how my ex didn't believe Aspergers was a real "thing"... that I was making it up to excuse my inability to communicate without words like everyone else can. (Garr how I hate hints!!) ...that is, until my eldest son was pretty much diagnosed with it. THEN she looked it up. Unfortunately, she's not the forgiving or changing-her-mind type.

Hi MissCAP,

I'm 44. I did not know about my AS until I was 36. I always knew i was different. Even though the person you saw would not formilly diagnose you, I feel just knowing you have AS helps because you know what to work on. It does get better.

I see you posted your picture as your avatar. You look good, so you have that going for you.

Yes?



What?



I'm still waiting.



Yes, and I insist on quoting every word if it irritates you, because I love poking obnoxious bores with a stick. I might even quote every letter. Good for me 'elf, innit.

She does, doesn't she.

Curlyfry, that's horrible that after the schools knew of the diagnosis they wouldn't let you help out, that's craziness!! It's so sad how so many just have no idea about AS. Thanks for letting me know about that book. I will go to the library tomorrow and check it out, I looked it up and I think it will be very helpful.
I am very glad that you found someone for you, that's awesome and really does give me hope!!

BlueMax,
my ex said I used it as a crutch. But I didn't. I am just me and I am different from most everyone I meet here where I live. Sorry about your ex, I guess it's just too hard for them to comprehend? I hate hints too. I am so direct and to the point and I would love if everyone else in this world was like that. I don't get hints.....just say what you want and what you mean, it's so simple. Are all your kids on the spectrum?

KenM,
Hi, how are ya? What made you find out when you were 36, how'd that come about? I agree, just knowing why I am the way I am has helped me sooo much. In Wal-Mart, instead of getting all EEEEKED out, I put my mp3 player in and I am in my own little world (like most times I'm out) and I do my shopping. It's nice to just know I really love being an Aspie. I would much rather be like this then the snakey/fake NT I have met. Seriously...