Board index › Coping in life › Love and Dating

How to tell if your girlfriend is a psycho.

Page 2 of 6 [ 85 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

BlueMax
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2007
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,285

15 Feb 2013, 4:00 pm

Ann2011 wrote:
I thought the video was amusing; the roles could easily have been switched though. Most of the signs of "psychoness" are not gender specific.


Very true, but the signs will be a little different from that side.



hyperlexian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2010
Age: 52
Gender: Female
Posts: 22,023
Location: with bucephalus

15 Feb 2013, 4:01 pm

BlueMax wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
BlueMax wrote:
Just finished the video now - so far it seems 100% accurate (the cleaver at the end is just in fun.)

I can't see anyone not liking this video unless it's exposing something icky they'd rather keep hidden.

i see what you did there you're implying there is something wrong with me if i don't like the video.

they misused the word "psycho". someone who flirts with other men or who has a celebrity obsession, for example, is not necessarily psychopathic (that should be fairly obvious). and they put the women in a normal-looking top and accused her of trying to attract other men's attention. i think the video is pretty mean spirited.


Believe it or not, no. I don't hold grudges.

Is your dislike for the video really limited to the misuse of the word "psycho"? If you replaced it with "unhealthy mental/emotional state" would you agree with the video? ...that demanding center stage, needing sexual approval from all men in the room, irrational anger, etc. is the sign of an unstable/unhealthy person?

i don't think i mentioned a grudge. i referred to your specific statement in the thread, which i've bolded. if you said in a thread, "i hate apples," then later in the same thread i stated, "i can't see anyone not liking apples unless there is something icky about them they'd rather keep hidden".... welllllll it would be fairly evident who i am referring to. :)

i would agree that all of those traits together would not be a healthy person (but not a psycho). they didn't really give the best examples of some of those traits, which is why it came across as mean spirited. many people have celebrity obsessions on the forum, for example, and it isn't a bad thing. and i would be a little worried if my partner considered a sleeveless shirt to be a scandalous garment that is designed to get attention from every man in the room - in that instance his own jealousy issues would be evident.


_________________
on a break, so if you need assistance please contact another moderator from this list:
viewtopic.php?t=391105


Ann2011
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jul 2011
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,843
Location: Ontario, Canada

15 Feb 2013, 5:11 pm

BlueMax wrote:
Yuugiri wrote:
Not going to bother with the video, but seriously guys, you really need to stop treating women as the enemy.


It's only two minutes long. Besides, you should see what it's like on our side of the battlefield someday... I know many of you gals spend much of your day in fear of being raped...

I don't feel in any immanent threat of rape on a daily basis any more than anything else I worry about. Also, men get raped too.

Quote:
many men now fear manipulative women utterly destroying their lives and having everything they have/love stolen from them.

That would suck.

Quote:
The one in the video is a good example of what we DO need to watch out for.

She was exhibiting undesirable qualities. But the guy could do the same. I especially liked it when she slapped the waiter's ass.

BlueMax wrote:
Ann2011 wrote:
I thought the video was amusing; the roles could easily have been switched though. Most of the signs of "psychoness" are not gender specific.


Very true, but the signs will be a little different from that side.

Well I have to agree about PMS. Sometimes I have strange hormonal things going on. But I have met men who exhibit the behaviours that she did.



bucephalus
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Jan 2009
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,847
Location: with Hyperlexian

15 Feb 2013, 5:17 pm

are we creep-shaming women now?


_________________
"grrrrr"


Yuugiri
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2013
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,049
Location: Washington

15 Feb 2013, 5:18 pm

BlueMax wrote:
It's only two minutes long. Besides, you should see what it's like on our side of the battlefield someday... I know many of you gals spend much of your day in fear of being raped... many men now fear manipulative women utterly destroying their lives and having everything they have/love stolen from them.

I don't know what it's like on EITHER side of the "battlefield". Also, I'm not a "gal". You're making women out to be the enemy again.


_________________
Averages
AS: 138.8
NT : 54.6


Last edited by Yuugiri on 15 Feb 2013, 6:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Misslizard
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Jun 2012
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 20,481
Location: Aux Arcs

15 Feb 2013, 5:27 pm

If "she"was a "he" in that vid it would describe my ex-husband perfectly.


_________________
I am the dust that dances in the light. - Rumi


BlueMax
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2007
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,285

15 Feb 2013, 6:19 pm

Yuugiri wrote:
BlueMax wrote:
It's only two minutes long. Besides, you should see what it's like on our side of the battlefield someday... I know many of you gals spend much of your day in fear of being raped... many men now fear manipulative women utterly destroying their lives and having everything they have/love stolen from them.

I don't know what it's like on EITHER side of the "battlefield". Also, I'm not a "gal".

Whoops! The girl in the avatar threw me...

Quote:
You're making women out to be the enemy again.

No, not quite. But I hope you don't find out the hard way... you're right at the age where things are about the become very.... interesting. You'll find out.
Good luck - it's a jungle out there.

Misslizard wrote:
If "she"was a "he" in that vid it would describe my ex-husband perfectly.

Right down the the always dressing sexy and hitting on women right in front of you? Demanding to be the sexiest man in the room or he'd pout like a child before having a violent fit?
Yuck. I've known a few guys like that too... my condolences.



Yuugiri
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2013
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,049
Location: Washington

15 Feb 2013, 6:30 pm

BlueMax wrote:
Whoops! The girl in the avatar threw me...

It's a guy in the avatar, lol, though I guess he does come off as pretty androgynous.

BlueMax wrote:
No, not quite.

You described it yourself as a battlefield. Who else could be the enemy?

BlueMax wrote:
But I hope you don't find out the hard way... you're right at the age where things are about the become very.... interesting. You'll find out.
Good luck - it's a jungle out there.

Good thing I'm not actively seeking a partner, nor plan to. If it's gonna happen, it'll happen. :P


_________________
Averages
AS: 138.8
NT : 54.6


Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 May 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 60,939
Location:      

15 Feb 2013, 6:32 pm

I saw nothing in the video that was in error; only several valid claims that might be taken as offensive by some.



BlueMax
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2007
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,285

15 Feb 2013, 6:36 pm

Yuugiri wrote:
BlueMax wrote:
But I hope you don't find out the hard way... you're right at the age where things are about the become very.... interesting. You'll find out.
Good luck - it's a jungle out there.

Good thing I'm not actively seeking a partner, nor plan to. If it's gonna happen, it'll happen. :P

The whole psycho abuse-the-different-person thing goes way, waaaaay deeper than dating - mostly in pretty much every workplace ever.

OOPS - misused the word "psycho" by using the very commonly-used definition of any moderately-crazy/disturbed person, rather than reserving it for only the specific full-diagnosis level. :roll:



Last edited by BlueMax on 15 Feb 2013, 6:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.

hyperlexian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2010
Age: 52
Gender: Female
Posts: 22,023
Location: with bucephalus

15 Feb 2013, 6:37 pm

Robert Hare’s Checklist of Psychopathy Symptoms wrote:

1. GLIB AND SUPERFICIAL CHARM

2. GRANDIOSE SELF-WORTH

3. NEED FOR STIMULATION or PRONENESS TO BOREDOM

4. PATHOLOGICAL LYING

5. CONNING AND MANIPULATIVENESS

6. LACK OF REMORSE OR GUILT

7. SHALLOW AFFECT

8. CALLOUSNESS and LACK OF EMPATHY

9. PARASITIC LIFESTYLE

10. POOR BEHAVIORAL CONTROLS

11. PROMISCUOUS SEXUAL BEHAVIOR

12. EARLY BEHAVIOR PROBLEMS

13. LACK OF REALISTIC, LONG-TERM GOALS

14. IMPULSIVITY

15. IRRESPONSIBILITY

16. FAILURE TO ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY FOR OWN ACTIONS

17. MANY SHORT-TERM RELATIONSHIPS

18. JUVENILE DELINQUENCY

19. REVOCATION OF CONDITION RELEASE

20. CRIMINAL VERSATILITY

hmmmm right... so very similar to the video.... yeah not really.

definitely depicted someone unbalanced and she ticked a couple of the boxes, but she wasn't like this.


_________________
on a break, so if you need assistance please contact another moderator from this list:
viewtopic.php?t=391105


Yuugiri
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2013
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,049
Location: Washington

15 Feb 2013, 6:47 pm

BlueMax wrote:
The whole psycho abuse-the-different-person thing goes way, waaaaay deeper than dating - mostly in pretty much every workplace ever.

Wait, are you saying I should be worried about women abusing me in the workplace?


_________________
Averages
AS: 138.8
NT : 54.6


BlueMax
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2007
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,285

15 Feb 2013, 6:52 pm

Yuugiri wrote:
BlueMax wrote:
The whole psycho abuse-the-different-person thing goes way, waaaaay deeper than dating - mostly in pretty much every workplace ever.

Wait, are you saying I should be worried about women abusing me in the workplace?


Women receive the carefully-crafted manipulation/abuse too - but regardless, I really, really hope you don't experience it.
So much more that could be said.... I'd rather back away from the subject for now. ;)



Yuugiri
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2013
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,049
Location: Washington

15 Feb 2013, 7:02 pm

BlueMax wrote:
Women receive the carefully-crafted manipulation/abuse too - but regardless, I really, really hope you don't experience it.
So much more that could be said.... I'd rather back away from the subject for now. ;)

I'm pretty much just... completely baffled, at this point. Why are you implying that this is a problem specific to women (as in, women are the perpetrators of this manipulation/abuse)? It's inarguable that men power trip and use sneaky methods to get their way the same as women do. It's a human problem.


_________________
Averages
AS: 138.8
NT : 54.6


BlueMax
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2007
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,285

15 Feb 2013, 7:10 pm

Whatever... by being able to twist my words a little to appeal to women, you're on the right track. They'll pat you on the head for it.

*brownie points*

My only point (which I will not discuss further) is that yes, both genders are abused. Yes, both genders are abusers.
...but women abusing men (subtly OR overtly) is not punished - it's encouraged and growing.

Yes, some people who can't see what's really happening out there, won't read statistics, reports and surveys - will be offended. That's too bad. This loathesome practice needs to stop, and that takes precedence over delicate, misplaced feelings.



Yuugiri
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2013
Age: 29
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,049
Location: Washington

15 Feb 2013, 7:37 pm

BlueMax wrote:
Whatever... by being able to twist my words a little to appeal to women, you're on the right track. They'll pat you on the head for it.

I'm not twisting your words. I'm trying to understand your posts. I apologize if I was strawmanning, but I really don't appreciate the implication. :/

BlueMax wrote:
My only point (which I will not discuss further) is that yes, both genders are abused. Yes, both genders are abusers.
...but women abusing men (subtly OR overtly) is not punished - it's encouraged and growing.

Yes, some people who can't see what's really happening out there, won't read statistics, reports and surveys - will be offended. That's too bad. This loathesome practice needs to stop, and that takes precedence over delicate, misplaced feelings.

Maybe you should've said this clearly from the offset. Yes, that kind of abuse is typically underreported, and that's a problem. Hopefully, one day, it won't be a problem anymore. I still kind of have an issue with the way you're framing it, though, like you think girls as a whole are relishing the fact that they're allowed to get away with that stuff. Maybe I'm misunderstanding you again, idk, but it's how you come off (to me, anyway).


_________________
Averages
AS: 138.8
NT : 54.6