why do some aspie men do so terrible with women

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True; there's a thread in one of these forums on basic communication skills and I noted how it's about exploring different avenues, things. I think I took the cue that learning was the goal of everyone because that's how I got ahead in school, knowing thigns, and so I really strive to find out all sorts of interesting facts so if someone says they like "x" I can eiher ask them bout it or concerse with them about it.

From what I was told before I asked the woman out I mention in my first post in this thread, sometimes guys are expected to take the lead in asking a woman out, and it *is* hard to know when to do that. If I recall, I may have actually asked this woman, "If I asked you out, would you say yes"? Or something like that. So, there is some uncertainty which bothers people, but we need to realize that uncertainty is part of ife for NTs, too. If a guy has to ask a silly question like that above, so be it. the problem I had in my late teens and early 20s was that I thought I was "supposed" to be embarrassed by such things, because NTs were. But, I have since learned that such things are going to be accepted.

Asking a quirky question like that might sound more like an 8th grader asking a girl to the spring formal, but who cares? It's not the same thing as having BO. It's asking a silly question that shows honesty and that you're not going to be overbearing, and that you can laugh at yourself and have fun. And, that's what my grandparents had that I saw as crucial in a relationship.

It's just that things didn't work out for the dating/marital relationship part. But, it's worked out for the best for me. But, that doesn't mean seeking friendship and building from there can't work for someone else.

I LOVE physics and astronomy! I don't know much about it yet, but I find it fascinating.

I'd suggest a date at the planetarium... but I don't think my wife would approve.

lol!
I've had a couple dates at Staples. I love Staples.

The only reason I could think of that an Aspie wouldn't be able to have female friends is they were showing sexual interest. Friendzone HER from the start. This will increase her comfort around you and she will safe in this relationship and it is non threatening. You have to be asexual. I was lucky to find two really hot girls from my highschool that for some strange reason actually enjoyed hanging out with me. We would smoke weed, tried cocaine for the first time with them, and having them around really desensitized me to female interaction. Also female friends increase what is called "social proof" which will make it much easier for you to have sex with other girls. If you are nervous or shy, then female friends are perfect for helping you. Just don't actually think you have a chance of getting sex and don't fall in love with her.

I would take his lack of interest as a hint....

It would totally depend on the girl. I'm just saying. If he's got a bunch of hot girls around him, I'm running the other direction, because I see myself as having no chance and feeling inferior in every way.

The lack of interest is to show that you do not consider her girlfriend material. This will confuse the girl and possibly even make her try harder. But the goal of this is to make her gain comfort as opposed to attraction (if you were going for a f**k buddy / girlfriend). Most Aspie men cannot sexually attract woman so by accepting that and friendzoning HER it helps your situation out in every way. My abilities at being a virginal friendzone guy are so grand that I actually ended up leasing a house with four attractive popular girls from university.

Also you would only run the other direction cause you're an Aspie. NT girls are actually attracted to players and guys that have sex with lots of woman. It shows that he is a high status male with preselection.

Last edited by ForeverAloneVirgin on 27 Jun 2013, 3:56 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Oh. o.o

Of course this is also why I hate NT girls and consider every girl a slut (no offence to you).
What my generation does is get piss drunk, dress really slu*ty, then smoke some weed, go to a club and grind on random guys, then choose one to have sex with.

I've never had weed... o.o

Grinding on random guys... and having sex with something random... I'm sorry, but I'm not the type to be able to take that kind of heartbreak. If I sleep with someone.... well.... ugh, I can't explain, nvm.

i wouldnt worry the above statement just simply isn't true at all.

I'm so confused.

It's just that I've seen plenty of NT girls not go for guys with ego complexes, so I'm confused...
Are you sure you have a complete view of NT girls? or just a view of that particular demographic?

Last edited by Charis on 27 Jun 2013, 4:16 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Yes it is true.
Otherwise they wouldn't be always having sex those same types of guys. Why do you always hear woman say guys are jerks, players, etc. It is because that is what they are attracted to. There is nothing they can do it is simply their internal psychology. They are wired to seek out the dominant guy of the group, the alpha male. Being with lots of woman shows that you are an indemand guy with high value. I agree it sounds f****d up, but I am just saying what is.

You can be confident and have high value without showing an ego. But the ego/cocky guys are actually able to get with girls as cocky is a confident trait of which woman are attracted to.

It seems more like you are well acquainted with that particular segment of a population, but a bit vague on others. It just doesn't seem reasonable for this to be the whole picture.