Friends with benefits -- need advice

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Good point. In fact, I think everyone deep down is that way. Romance is a social construct; no apes apart from a few subspecies of gibbons are "romantic" and monogamous.

Looking for an FWB?


Very simple.

Just turn gay.

The FWB relationship would be easy to find in the male gay world, and it doesnt exist at all in the heterosexual world.


So either loose the heterosexuality, or loose the quest for a FWB.

If Spock can carry out a conversation and conduct a space battle at the same time I think AS guys can manage intelligent discourse during intercourse.

You two are depressing... what was her name?

BS.

Anyway. All of my FWB relationships were dudes from college. Friends first, then the really forward kind of trampy question of "so you're entirely hot. Want to turn this into a FWB thing?"

That site is pure and utter garbage. Also known as sex finder (they are mirror sites actually) Half the people on there are only looking for online chat sex. Plus if the woman is attractive it is a scam or a "fake" profile or a hooker. I signed up and got scammed by some really young attractive woman (at least from the photo) says she is in my area visiting so I tried to set up a time to meet but she kept speaking in generalities, then she claimed she was a porn model for Adult Friend Finder and I would need to pay money or something like that. I am assuming she was either a hooker or a scammer. But I immediately cut it off. Plus after this woman I saw at least 10 more women who all were from different locations saying they are visiting in my area. And half of them were using male accounts that said "oh I am using my ex-boyfriend's account". I knew something was fishy from the beginning with the one I talked to but I wanted to believe it was true. Well stupid me I got sucked in. Never again. Most of the other women completely ignored me as usual. And I talked to about 3 women that never led anywhere. One woman (who was older) I said I wanted a casual relationship she backed off saying she wanted something with more connection and then she turned off her profile! So let me get this straight you are on a sex based website and you want more connection that just sex. Whatever. Obviously she found someone else who was better than me because why turn of your profile. She said she was not ready to date because her life just got really busy. Man, the stories these people come up with.

I have heard people that know how to hook up with women cannot even get anything from sex finder/adult friend finder. Well unless you A) like unattractive women, B)want online sex chat C)want a hooker. The last option just call an escort service it would be a heck of a lot easier. Got the money and you can get it tonight. No rejection.

And honestly I am not that desperate that I would pay for sex and I just am not willing to take the risk (I live in the US so it is illegal) plus I do not have the money and my family sure isn't going to pay for that. Plus, I would probably get one a few times a week. Once would not be enough and escorts are way too expensive.

I tried the "bicurious" thing...i think I've had my fill of that for now. But this last advice I can work with. So how do I go about spotting the women who are likely to go for it? Obviously people have differing sexual boundaries.

I am a little cautious or weary of people who are emotionally void or lack empathy for this exact reason. Half of the people that only want sex have to be emotionally screwed in some way. Also there seems to be more way more men that would do this than women. The ratio is very poor. I mean with so many guys to choose from the chance it will happen to you is not likely.

I mean I have pondered this. I have a female friend should I ask her? I already have a feeling it is a resounding no and then she would get all creeped out. So not going to try it.

I was just looking at swingers clubs in my area but I am too chicken to do it. It is good as a fantasy though and I have heard that keeping it a fantasy is better otherwise you may find that when you fulfill your fantasy it may not measure up to what you expected. Fantasy is generally something you actually do not want to happen in real life. At least for me. But if I was presented with a situation I think maybe I would do it. Only if I went with somebody though. I mean I would rather go to a swinger club with a date instead of by myself. Honestly that scene would be way too awkward for me alone.

Objective note: You waffle a lot, perhaps because you don't know what you want? If that's true you need to figure this out as step one.

Bahamut-

It's something to observe. Compliments go a long way. If a girl just says "aww that's sweet" then she's not interested.

Interested reactions can range from
"Anything else you like?" To wearing what you complimented more often (or showing more if you complimented a body part)
She's got nice legs? Tell her. If she starts wearing shorter skirts or shorts, she WANTS you to notice her body.

It's trickier when you're a guy because girls can take offense easier. It's a learning game, and it sucks. It will pan out the more attention you pay though.

find a married woman.

Hahahaha, I love this post because I am married.
Laughed too hard.

Although it as a good point, some married chicks go for that kind of thing.

ashleymadison.com


Of course, if you help a woman cheat on her husband, karma may pay it forward to you if you ever get married.

Sex with good conversation = f**k buddy, sex with good conversation + commitment + responsabillity = relationship

I want sex with good convo + commitment but don't want anything to do with their family.
What do you call that?

You shouldn't do friends with benefits that's wrong.