Never had a girlfriend at 21. I feel sad and lonely???

Page 2 of 4 [ 52 posts ] Go to page Previous 1, 2, 3, 4 Next

Previous topic | Next topic

Jono
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 10 Jul 2008
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,657
Location: Johannesburg, South Africa

16 Jul 2013, 1:54 am

dajand8 wrote:

you need to sleep with the women who come onto you even if you dont like them. Once you gain experience it will give you more confidence and make it easier for you to get a girl you do like.

That's not helpful advice. He's not just looking for sex.

Ferrus91
Deinonychus

Joined: 25 Apr 2013
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 311
Location: Kent, UK

16 Jul 2013, 4:21 am

JBO wrote:

26, never been on a date. Not sad or ronery.

Yup. Same.

wtfid2
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,712
Location: usa

16 Jul 2013, 3:24 pm

XenSmithy wrote:

I'm not exactly confident, but I try to be. Sometimes I try too hard or not hard enough. I also seem to get attention from women that I am not interested in or they turn out to be extremely desperate or tell me to much info about themselves (like their past sex life on our first phone call) and it turns me off very fast. What can I do to improve my game/confidence? Where do guys go to meet smart women?

the sad reality is that you will be making this same thread at 41 and nothing will have ever changed.

_________________
AQ 25

Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits

wtfid2
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,712
Location: usa

16 Jul 2013, 3:36 pm

billiscool wrote:

I didn't have my first ''real''GF until I was 23,so maybe their hope for you guys.
but in my case,she asked me out.

(I did have a girlfriend in high school,but we really didn't do anything)

it bothers me when people say i didnt have my first REAL gf....as if that makes it better.

op hasnt had any gf....even if your gf was not the best, she was still a real gf if you guys were intimate.

_________________
AQ 25

Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits

wtfid2
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,712
Location: usa

16 Jul 2013, 3:36 pm

Jono wrote:

dajand8 wrote:

you need to sleep with the women who come onto you even if you dont like them. Once you gain experience it will give you more confidence and make it easier for you to get a girl you do like.

That's not helpful advice. He's not just looking for sex.

maybe he is

_________________
AQ 25

Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits

wtfid2
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,712
Location: usa

16 Jul 2013, 3:38 pm

Keni wrote:

Most of those who dated early went through mismatches, broken hearts, arguments and misery.
I know I'd like to totally erase a few abysmal moments.
It's as if youth is a pit you will not emerge from unscathed however it goes.
The good news is, it gets better as you go.

im guessing you are a girl

_________________
AQ 25

Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits

Erlonman
Snowy Owl

Joined: 15 Jun 2013
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 142

16 Jul 2013, 4:03 pm

Don't worry about having a girlfriend at this stage in your life. I am 20, and I have only had a girl that I had about a month and a 1/2 relationship with back in high school.

As to the point of self confidence, someone else on the thread said to focus on personal development. That would probably be your best option at this point in time.

billiscool
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 5 Feb 2006
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,989

16 Jul 2013, 6:24 pm

wtfid2 wrote:

billiscool wrote:

I didn't have my first ''real''GF until I was 23,so maybe their hope for you guys.
but in my case,she asked me out.

(I did have a girlfriend in high school,but we really didn't do anything)

it bothers me when people say i didnt have my first REAL gf....as if that makes it better.

op hasnt had any gf....even if your gf was not the best, she was still a real gf if you guys were intimate.

well,my first g.f we didn't really do anything,it wasn't that great. my second one, I count as my first ''true''gf.
but having a ''lame'' do nothing g.f is better than none at all.

puddingmouse
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Apr 2010
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,777
Location: Cottonopolis

16 Jul 2013, 7:28 pm

1000Knives wrote:

Stargazer43 wrote:

1000Knives wrote:

I'm still just as unsuccessful with girls now that I look almost like a bodybuilder, can cook, work on cars, and have more hobbies and interests than anime and Gundam models than when I just was a fat nerd who played video games and watched anime all day.

But I bet the odds are far more in your favor than they used to be, even if you haven't had any tangible success yet (that's how I feel in my personal case). And even if you don't have success with women I'm sure all of those things make you feel better and happier about yourself in any event.

Nope I hate myself more than ever because I've not achieved anything despite doing lots of "cool" things. Before I could just say "well maybe people don't like me because I'm fat" or whatever when I really just suck at everything.

I think it's just luck. Your personality from what I've seen on here is attractive and I'm sure you look attractive. It's not you. It's luck luck luck.

I don't have all that much luck either but I'm learning to really appreciate the social relationships I do have.

_________________
Zombies, zombies will tear us apart...again.

wtfid2
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,712
Location: usa

16 Jul 2013, 8:07 pm

billiscool wrote:

wtfid2 wrote:

billiscool wrote:

I didn't have my first ''real''GF until I was 23,so maybe their hope for you guys.
but in my case,she asked me out.

(I did have a girlfriend in high school,but we really didn't do anything)

it bothers me when people say i didnt have my first REAL gf....as if that makes it better.

op hasnt had any gf....even if your gf was not the best, she was still a real gf if you guys were intimate.

well,my first g.f we didn't really do anything,it wasn't that great. my second one, I count as my first ''true''gf.
but having a ''lame'' do nothing g.f is better than none at all.

here's the thing bill, even if you didnt do much, you still had the validation of knowing you attracted her and had the social skills to get her.

_________________
AQ 25

Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits

wtfid2
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,712
Location: usa

16 Jul 2013, 8:09 pm

puddingmouse wrote:

1000Knives wrote:

Stargazer43 wrote:

1000Knives wrote:

so true..i am 6'2, built solid, green eyes, atractive face, extremely intelligent, love animals, college educated, but still never kissed a girl and iturn 24 later in the year.

although my disabilities do make me useless despite having high intelligence..i have bad paranoia and i cant hold a job, and i get anxious

_________________
AQ 25

Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits

slovaksiren
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Oct 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 677
Location: la la land

16 Jul 2013, 8:40 pm

Movies seem to make us think that the heroes always get the girl and we start to think that we are entitled to the same, but we're not, live is not a movie, it's all improv, which that doesn't mean its bad, it just isn't very straight-forward like a movie, but most importantly, don't base your worth on whether or not you have a girlfriend. Focus on a career perhaps. You'd be surprised how many times you'll find someone when you aren't even trying, just enjoy life and meet new people, friendzoning isn't necessarily bad, infact, friends, even female friends, can provide you with companionship you may just need, not in the same way as a girlfriend, but it can still be fulfilling if you realize that the friendzone isn't bad and can be rewarding as long as you accept it being platonic.

Pabalebo
Velociraptor

Joined: 2 Dec 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 410
Location: Poughkeespie NY

17 Jul 2013, 10:10 pm

21 is nothing. There are happy guys on this site in their 50s who haven't. I'm 22 and I'm just barely scratching the surface of the dating game now.

_________________
Not my chair, not my problem, that's what I say.

wtfid2
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,712
Location: usa

17 Jul 2013, 11:29 pm

Pabalebo wrote:

21 is nothing. There are happy guys on this site in their 50s who haven't. I'm 22 and I'm just barely scratching the surface of the dating game now.

they arent happy, they are just accepting and coping with their sh***y lives. How can anyone be happy knowing that noone wants them? Even if they were asexual the feeling of rejection would still hurt them.

also, you have done things with girls before so not to be an ass but it's an insult that you categorize yourself with the op just because you havent lost your virginity.

lastly, saying he has time is bs too. He has time to meet an old hag, but his youth is fading he will never meet a hot young thanggg.

_________________
AQ 25

Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits

puddingmouse
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Apr 2010
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,777
Location: Cottonopolis

17 Jul 2013, 11:35 pm

^ Old hags are better at sex.

Most are better at relationships, too.

_________________
Zombies, zombies will tear us apart...again.

wtfid2
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Aug 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,712
Location: usa

18 Jul 2013, 1:11 am

puddingmouse wrote:

^ Old hags are better at sex.

Most are better at relationships, too.

even if that were true, the fact that the guy has NO CHOICE and is FORCED to settle for them, is a crime.
he fact that the guy got rejected by the young girls and only has the old hags, to experience his first love is a crime

i disagree that oldies are better at sex...they aren't as attractive, and have been with a lot of guys..that is gross. Younger girls are HOT and fresh(er)

Young girls can be ok in relationships, it all depends on the person, but i agree older women prob are better.

It's just a shame that girls can have sex as much as they want at a young age, and then when they are older they can choose to settle down with a gy who was a virgin all his life, and she gets to experience the virgin while he gets someone who has been with a million guys. He also is probably going to be used for his providing for the gal.

_________________
AQ 25

Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 111 of 200
You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits

Page 2 of 4 [ 52 posts ] Go to page Previous 1, 2, 3, 4 Next

Jump to:

Similar Topics
I'm lonely 19f in Love and Dating	28 Oct 2024, 4:28 am Benjamin the Donkey
Feeling lonely and hopeless in General Autism Discussion	04 Jan 2025, 5:47 pm timf
Advice regarding girlfriend in Love and Dating	30 Oct 2024, 8:33 am rse92
Does anyone else want a girlfriend just for social occasions in Love and Dating	02 Jan 2025, 5:32 am Canadian Freedom Lover

Never had a girlfriend at 21. I feel sad and lonely??? Post Reply New Topic

Never had a girlfriend at 21. I feel sad and lonely???