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What's worse actually for a guy who is a 40 yo virgin?

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lost561
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03 Oct 2013, 3:54 pm

cogle wrote:
It's better to try and fail than never try at all and wonder what if you did.


That wasn't the situation presented. But I do agree.



the_alchemist
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03 Oct 2013, 3:56 pm

Me and my friend approached hundreds and failed. So what.

Both him and me went on to get a girlfriend. Getting laid alot is a whole other ballgame than getting a gf



lost561
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03 Oct 2013, 3:59 pm

the_alchemist wrote:
lost561 wrote:
the_alchemist wrote:
Yep I would. Its good practice for social skills. Then when a relationship comes along you've practiced for it.


Don't you think that after 50 times there's something totally wrong with you that you couldn't fix?


No


Well, it's evident that if somebody couldn't figure out their main problems and what they need to do to be successful whether it be approaching different types of women, dressing differently, taking anti anxiety medication to be confident, etc. that if after 50 women they still are unsuccessful, than their approach isn't working or something about that person is such a turn off that nobody wants them.



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03 Oct 2013, 4:02 pm

lost561 wrote:
the_alchemist wrote:
lost561 wrote:
the_alchemist wrote:
Yep I would. Its good practice for social skills. Then when a relationship comes along you've practiced for it.


Don't you think that after 50 times there's something totally wrong with you that you couldn't fix?


No


Well, it's evident that if somebody couldn't figure out their main problems and what they need to do to be successful whether it be approaching different types of women, dressing differently, taking anti anxiety medication to be confident, etc. that if after 50 women they still are unsuccessful, than their approach isn't working or something about that person is such a turn off that nobody wants them.


Perhaps not a person who a girl would have sex with in a club. I don't take offense to that.



the_alchemist
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03 Oct 2013, 4:15 pm

Don't judge success by how many girls you **** judge success by how you improve yourself for the better.



lost561
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03 Oct 2013, 4:17 pm

the_alchemist wrote:
Don't judge success by how many girls you **** judge success by how you improve yourself for the better.


How do you judge how much you improve yourself for the better when it comes to picking up women?



the_alchemist
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03 Oct 2013, 4:29 pm

lost561 wrote:
the_alchemist wrote:
Don't judge success by how many girls you **** judge success by how you improve yourself for the better.


How do you judge how much you improve yourself for the better when it comes to picking up women?


Live a life that makes you happy. Someone told me "if girls didn't exist how would you make yourself happy" If your happy people will notice. I can't stress enough how important this is. I also don't know why its important but it is. Where do you want to travel? what job do you want? What skills do you want to aquire?

Social skills: im improving my social skills with impromptu acting, toast masters and vocal coaching (more for sales but i have a monotone voice)

Image: your sending out messages with your clothing. I'm also a little overweight. Im working on both

Dont put her on a pedastol. Our culture has ingrained in us that we need to be nice to girls to attract them. If you are acting nice she will resent you. You want to treat her like everyone else.

Dont be desperate: it starts out as a friendly game. Don't get too serious too early



the_alchemist
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03 Oct 2013, 4:39 pm

grow as a person and hang out with the NT's



Kinme
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03 Oct 2013, 4:47 pm

I think a dinosaur in your butt would be worse, Uprising.



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03 Oct 2013, 4:50 pm

Kinme wrote:
I think a dinosaur in your butt would be worse, Uprising.

Nah I think a pikachu would sting more.



lost561
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03 Oct 2013, 4:55 pm

the_alchemist wrote:
lost561 wrote:
the_alchemist wrote:
Don't judge success by how many girls you **** judge success by how you improve yourself for the better.


How do you judge how much you improve yourself for the better when it comes to picking up women?


Live a life that makes you happy. Someone told me "if girls didn't exist how would you make yourself happy" If your happy people will notice. I can't stress enough how important this is. I also don't know why its important but it is. Where do you want to travel? what job do you want? What skills do you want to aquire?

Social skills: im improving my social skills with impromptu acting, toast masters and vocal coaching (more for sales but i have a monotone voice)

Image: your sending out messages with your clothing. I'm also a little overweight. Im working on both

Dont put her on a pedastol. Our culture has ingrained in us that we need to be nice to girls to attract them. If you are acting nice she will resent you. You want to treat her like everyone else.

Dont be desperate: it starts out as a friendly game. Don't get too serious too early


While I agree that it's important to be happy, and also agree with some of the points you made, why not have the best of both worlds? You can be happy, live a life you love, etc. and I would be even happier if I picked up more women.



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03 Oct 2013, 6:03 pm

Uprising wrote:
Being a 40 year old virgin because you were afraid of approaching women and therefore didn't ever try it? (ignorance = bliss?)

Or

Being a 40 year old virgin because every woman you've approached in your lifetime (regardless of what they looked like and where they were from) rejected you fiercefully (...and let's say in this case it's more than 50 women obviously...) to the point it even gave you a giant global "fame" for being the way you are now?


A lot of people say no reputation is worse than a bad reputation, but I'm not sure of it in this context though.


What do you think?


first one is love shy
second one is incel.



the_alchemist
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03 Oct 2013, 6:12 pm

lost561 wrote:
the_alchemist wrote:
lost561 wrote:
the_alchemist wrote:
Don't judge success by how many girls you **** judge success by how you improve yourself for the better.


How do you judge how much you improve yourself for the better when it comes to picking up women?


Live a life that makes you happy. Someone told me "if girls didn't exist how would you make yourself happy" If your happy people will notice. I can't stress enough how important this is. I also don't know why its important but it is. Where do you want to travel? what job do you want? What skills do you want to aquire?

Social skills: im improving my social skills with impromptu acting, toast masters and vocal coaching (more for sales but i have a monotone voice)

Image: your sending out messages with your clothing. I'm also a little overweight. Im working on both

Dont put her on a pedastol. Our culture has ingrained in us that we need to be nice to girls to attract them. If you are acting nice she will resent you. You want to treat her like everyone else.

Dont be desperate: it starts out as a friendly game. Don't get too serious too early


While I agree that it's important to be happy, and also agree with some of the points you made, why not have the best of both worlds? You can be happy, live a life you love, etc. and I would be even happier if I picked up more women.


yeah, best of both worlds



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04 Oct 2013, 12:16 am

Uprising wrote:
Being a 40 year old virgin because you were afraid of approaching women and therefore didn't ever try it? (ignorance = bliss?)

Or

Being a 40 year old virgin because every woman you've approached in your lifetime (regardless of what they looked like and where they were from) rejected you fiercefully (...and let's say in this case it's more than 50 women obviously...) to the point it even gave you a giant global "fame" for being the way you are now?


A lot of people say no reputation is worse than a bad reputation, but I'm not sure of it in this context though.


What do you think?


Being 41?



Declension
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04 Oct 2013, 1:33 am

CranialRectosis wrote:
If someone were to fall into category 2, he is a mighty, mighty bastion of courage.


More like a mighty bastion of arrogance and denial. The only way I could see option 2 happening is if the person has never asked himself why he keeps getting rejected.



The_Face_of_Boo
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04 Oct 2013, 1:41 am

The 2nd case is worse.