Please help! Romance disaster!

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To add: at least now you know that nothing you did was wrong, but hopefully this experience will be a chance to learn from for the next time.

Yeah, he just used you, he never was interested in anything else. You think you got along so well, but he was just doing all that to get the food and sex.
Forget him. People can be too deceitful.

To the original poster,

I am so sorry that this unfortunate situation happened to you. You didn't deserve to be treated like this and it sounds like you didn't do anything wrong. You need to stop trying to "fix" this, stop contacting this guy via text or skype or FB, and block him from those means if you are able, even if just to prevent yourself from texting him again in a weak moment. Delete his number from your phone.

This guy is an as*hole. I'm not going to try and excuse his behavior with any guyisms, because no matter what the reason, he was dishonest with you. Being sexually intimate with you and then pulling this kind of 180 makes him an as*hole no matter how you slice it.

My guess, he either:

1. Was only baiting you long enough to get casual sex. He's probably doing this to three other women right now, in different stages of seduction. Keep this in mind next time you want to contact him.

2. He's a sociopath and has no empathy for the fact that he completely used you.

3. He's afraid of intimacy and commitment and relationships but nonetheless wanted an opportunity to qualm his sex drive a bit.

or 4. He doesn't like you enough to be in a relationship with you, but settled for a shag.

No matter how you slice it, he's a douchebag. He's probably telling his equally immature friends right now how you're this "crazy stalker girl" who won't leave him alone. It's happened to more of my girl friends than I can count. This guy's a serial loser. Forget the special connection you felt with him because it wasn't real on his end. I'm sorry to be so blunt, but I feel like you need to hear the unbiased truth. You were used by this guy.

In the future, let access to your body be a beautiful thing that someone has to carefully, and slowly, unwrap. It will only make you feel cheap and used to know that someone slept with you for a mere shag. Also, although herpes is not quite as prevalent in the UK as it is in the US, please also keep in mind that a guy that would be dishonest with you about his intentions certainly wouldn't share the information that he has or carries an STD. His goal was to sleep with you, so he wouldn't do anything to knock those chances. In fact, go get yourself tested, and repeat it again in 6-8 weeks, just to be safe. I'm sorry to sound like an alarmist, but it's a reality we have to face in today's world.

Much love.

Based on what I read we cannot logically ascertain that he "used' you. What I can see with certainty is that he was not able to be honest with you. Another way to say that is that he was not ready for intimacy. Another way to say that is that he was not ready for you.
He is not right or wrong or good or bad...he is just not ready for you.
It is highly probable that he was unsettled by your readiness for intimate sharing. That he was forced to reflect on his own limitations. This kind of reflection is unbearable for most NT's.

If he was just a 'jerk', as it has been tempting for others to guess, he would have been more likely to keep you dragging along by continuing to enfold you in his charms, or to just disappear altogether, not responding to you at all.
He doesn't want to hurt you. He is just not ready for you.

The things that you loved about him were alive and real, but they are more a projection of your own beauty than of his.

You sound like a gem, OP.

Don't feed the troll, guys.[/quote]
Is this fair?
Sorry, I'm autistic. What did I say that reeks of troll to Deuter?

Thanks everyone.

If you were on his mind, he would have made time for you. Distance is usually used to calm down tense situations. So... it looks like he doesn't want this to become "tense" even though it wasn't to begin with. There is your answer. And he is probably not an as*hole. He is using the "didn't you know social rules" technique of saying thanks, but no thanks.