Anyone had any good experiences with online dating?

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Hey Charlie92 (and everyone else)! This is actually my first post/comment on here so please forgive me if I make any miss steps.

Full disclosure, I am not an Aspie myself. But I am a life/social skills development coach and have made it my focus to help people with ASD develop really functional and effective social skills ad strategies for quite a while now.

Anyway, in response to the original question: quite a few of my Aspie clients have found that online dating has been a really good solution for them as it gives them away to talk to/get to know people without the usual anxiety of having to think of things to say quickly and feeling like they are being judged.

A few of them have also said it takes away the fear of rejection they normally feel when approaching someone.

Quite a few of my Aspie clients had a lot of success using it (all of them that I can think of got dates, and at least a couple are still with the girls they met online), I think mostly because they were able to relax more than usual through the whole process.

Its also a really good way to practice flirting!

Anyway I hope that helps, giving quite a few experiences rolled into one.

Because its worked so well for some of my Aspie clients and friends I wrote a series of blog posts and video tutorials on 'how to get the most out of online dating for an Aspie'. Part 1(of 3) is already up on my blog, and Ill post the other two very shortly so feel free to check it out! Hopefully it helps, and I'd love to hear any feedback

I think there should be a link to my website under this automatically? If not just google succeedingsociallyaspie

Oh, and apart from that feel free to ask my any questions here. I'd really like to become more involved in the community so I can get better at what I do!

I am. Aside from the fact that she wanted to go drinking, this was the reason I didn't keep talking to her, I must admit. I'm terrified of meeting someone normal and being me all weird and twitchy and anxious and not having a clue what I'm supposed to do.

Haha, I've never been on POF. I am in the UK. lol

And also yeah, definitely not looking for quick sex, which is kind of a worry too, that people will get the wrong idea.

I wrote this short guide to using OKC sometime back, some people have found it helpful:

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postx238381-0-0.html

I never got a date from any of the many dating sites I tried. However I met my current girlfriend & my two exes on online forums. I met my current & my 2nd gl here on WP by posting aLOT about various things, especially relationship stuff & not just what I wanted in a partner but the way I am with one & what I had to offer. There was alot of luck involved too.

Nope, can't say that I have had good experiences with online dating, in fact, most online dating websites that I have checked out were just a waste of time.

None here. But I haven't met that many people.

Not much experience here, but I've met a couple of nice people, had a couple of relaxed dates, and managed the old leg-over when I've needed it.

My fear of dating sites is slowly wearing off, though I still won't put pictures up (small town + knowing lots of people courtesy of previous jobs) and my profile generally makes me sound like a cold, prickly bastard.

It's honest though.

I met my fiancé here on WP in the Eligible Odd-Bods thread. I was a new member at the time and was in need of a relationship. A day after posting my profile, he sent me a message introducing himself, and wanted to get to know me. So we exchanged messages, and after a while, we started texting each other and going on dates. About a month and a half ago, my fiancé proposed to me, and we have been happily engaged ever since.

Congrats! That is awesome.

That's great, congratulations!

Not really what I'd think of as "online dating" though, even though you did meet online. WP is a totally different site from OKC and such.

I was on tinder, and had quite positive experiences.

Online dating sucks, but as an introvert, you're pretty much at the mercy of these sites.

In my experience, you have to have success with meeting and dating girls in the real world before you can meet girls online. That's just how it is.

That's not to say online dating will never work, but you're chances without having any real world experience are too low to make it worthwhile imo.

I don't buy that for a second.

I've never asked a guy out in public. Granted, I've had many conversations with strangers - that's never a problem - but I've never asked a guy out in public. Meanwhile I can connect with someone online and arrange for a date via email no problem.

I don't see how this would be any different for someone to do with a girl.

Well, in just one month on eHarmony I had:
- 11 Women contact me or send an icebreaker (contacted 10 back)
- Contacted 12 women and 2 responded
- 7 Made it to stage 4 (open communication)
- Dated 3 and went all the way with 1
- All were who they said they were
- I haven't clicked with anyone yet but still have 4 more to meet
- I was forced to confront some deep-seated issues I have with control and I realize why I was single for so long.

After all my rants against online dating, I have to say even with no relationship (yet...) my eHarmony experience was a smashing success! I've also learned there is nothing scary or intimidating about women and they are generally easy to approach in real life too. It's almost like it was dropped the scales of how many quality, single women are out there.

In contrast, in my previous attempt 2-3 years ago with 3 months:
- 6 Women contacted me
- Only got to open communication with 1 (and she flaked)
- Messaged only 4 women and got shot down hard

I have come a long way!