The more attractive-looking woman is the pickier...

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Replying them doesn't mean they're willing to date them - at least, not all of those 10%.

Yes you're right.

Being an attractive woman has many benefits. People will generally treat you better and you definitely won't have any problems with dating at all since you have a huge supply which means you can afford to be more picky. Also I would like to add that I think that there are more attractive women then there are men, especially for women 30 or younger. Being attractive is more of a benefit for women then it is for men because women are often sought for their beauty and men put a greater emphasis on looks for someone to date, especially if they're younger.


For attractive women, they're generally seen as more popular and have better social skills which is usually the case. One reason for this is that attractive woman are treated better and are more likely to receive attention from peers so their confidence and social skills blossom. They also tend to date younger because their looks means they will be approached by guys and surely one will win her heart. This is why you rarely see women who are 25 and older and have never had a boyfriend compared to men. And being a shy girl isn't as bad as being a shy guy.



Attractive women are also more picky due to supply and demand. Remember that a pretty girl has many guys that want to be with her, some men will actively pursue her while others who are too shy will secretly like her hoping for that small chance she will go talk to them. (This usually never happens) For every pretty girl there is, there's probably at least 5 guys who have a crush on her. Since girls have more prospects, this means they can afford to be more picky in who they choose to date, they arne't just going to date any guy that shows an interest in them.


Meanwhile guys have it harder when it comes to dating, especially if they're shy, have crappy social skills, and they're not very attractive. Men usually have less prospects and they're the ones expected to do the approaching to impress a girl. This is very hard if you're very shy and not the greatest looking guy because you really don't a chance getting a girlfriend if you lack social skills and you're physically unattractive. You also receive little attention from the opposite sex which can be depressing. Due to all of this, the majority of people who are 25 years old and never been in a relationship or had sex are men. Very few women reach this milestone unless they're physically unattractive and have sh***y social skills.

First off, duh. To everything you wrote, not just this quoted bit.

As for getting in better shape and then having increased confidence in talking with others you find attractive.. the same holds true for guys. I've gotten into far better physical shape over the last couple years or so and I find it infinitely easier to chat with ever better looking people, both online and in person. Of course it helps that I've nearly eliminated any anxiety & depression symptoms, too. But yeah, oh so much easier to chat up good looking people once you're in better shape yourself.

Hell, here's an example of that.. someone I would have hooked up with 4 years ago messaged me looking to get together for some casual fun. After seeing current pics and realizing I've gotten into far better shape while they've let themselves go a bit.. no thanks. My bar has risen. I can't be bothered to hookup with someone below X attractiveness to me. I'd rather spend my time reading or running or something.

Yeah, I'll talk with anyone, too. It makes doing sales work pretty easy peasy.. but may also give some people the wrong impression sometimes.. like the one who leaned in and asked if they could kiss me on the beach last week.. no. They weren't my type, but I didn't mind chatting with them.

Or don't be desperate. Improve yourself & attract more attractive people into your life.

Yes, but since many very attractive women are very picky and select the same type of picky men, their relationships will typically be shallow, just like themselves and the men they fancy. Some of them get together with odd aspies (especially if they are aspies themselves), because not all people are content with shallow partners and relationships. So I wouldn't say all the beautiful women are off-limits for aspies. Playing natural do work on some of them, faking NT surely won't.



Yes, but women in their 30s and beyond do have similar problems as many aspie men, because men typically are attracted to women in their teens or 20s.



Yes, but women 30 or beyond that have never been in a relationship have a very poor chance of ever getting into one, while this is not true for men in their 30s or 40s.

Absolutely, or if they are aspies, by appealing to their natural contact and relationship preferences. Of course, the latter doesn't work well with online dating, or dating at all.

not as much as other guys and some of the women.
I have a small beer belly as they call it. while i see guys who can't even fit through a door. they can't get food, how do they keep getting bigger? I bit worried about them to be honest. but its none of my business. but I'm way smaller then them.


they do but they are a fraction of the single women population. I do say most obese women I met are either married, dating or have a lot of kids. though there isnt' a whole lot of obese women in my area. there's what some might call obese but others would call curvy, you know the ones who aren't skin and bones.

Chart of attractive women. Judging women with looks and prettiness. Seems all messed up.

Physical beauty fades, but attractiveness can last a lifetime. I may find a person's quirks attractive that may turn others off. Personality, is what I find most attractive. Of course, I need to be somewhat physically attractive to the person, but a person's uniqueness is what makes them stand above all the rest. I get told all the time, that I am attractive, pretty, beautiful,.....etc., by random people who don't know me.

Society says that we have a shelf life, meaning, after a certain age, we become obsolete "attractive" or not. I'd like to think that I'm much more than a so called pretty face that will eventually fade.

****Beauty is in the eye of the beholder****

Someone who may not be as physically attractive to someone else, could be someone I consider my soulmate. To me, it's about the full package.

Bolded is reflected in what we see in chart. You think yourself you are rare for caring about personality? Nope, you aren't
But of course... he has to be at a certain bar in looks.

It is so easy for people to sound ideal behind the screen but "But this" and "But that" often reflect the tip of the reality iceberg.

This is all very very true. The people I've been most attracted to certainly do have physical/aesthetic flaws, but because of the overall whole package attraction those flaws become unique traits that make them even more attractive because it's all a part of who they are.

Then there are people who might be a physical perfect 10, but then they open their mouths and speak and their attitude is terrible, making them very unattractive.

It's certainly not just about physical attraction. At all.

This post comes across as a it rude, Boo. Loveurself was just being honest and real. Most people care about personality, but, most people ALSO care about physical aesthetic attraction. I care about both. See my post above. Someone could be smoking hot, but have a negative attitude in some way or another and it's a total turnoff.

And of course there's a certain bar in looks for Loveurself, and for me, for you and most others - you've posted about being hit on by "bigger" girls that you're not mutually attracted to. Don't be a hypocrite. Attraction is what it is for each of us. Everyone has their type and criteria & it varies widely from person to person.

There is no iceberg to hide. Loveurself was being very crystal clear transparent about their criteria. There are no "but this" and "but that" things to conceal. No one's sitting here posting and saying that it's 100% about personality and not about physical/aesthetic criteria at all. Sure, there may be some people like that out there, but they are very very few and far between.

Myself, there are many people I've met with amazing personalities that I'd befriend, but would never hookup with or date because there's no physical attraction. Hell, I've been on the receiving end of the same. I'm not my friend's physical type or we'd be a different kind of friends. It is what it is.. and perhaps what it's meant to be, as we are amazingly good friends to one another - better than I EVER could have hoped for in a friendship, TBH. But I accept that I don't fit his criteria for physical attraction in a handful of ways that are critical criteria for him, and they're things entirely beyond my control, sooo we're not likely to ever be together in that way and that's OK. FYI, though it's not super high on the list of things he's not attracted to, my height is an issue - I'm too tall. Everyone has their likes and dislikes.. it just is what it is for each of us.

Doesn't matter. We live in an age where every woman who isn't hideously deformed thinks she's Jennifer Lawrence or Scarlett Johansson. Besides, women are only interested in men who will up their social or financial status in some manner. If you can't do that, then you're worthless, and they'd rather either be alone their entire lives or get knocked up by some Chad McAlpha and raise the kid alone as a single mom than to shack up with you.

Like I said, what I find attractive may not be attractive to someone else. Someone considered "unattractive" may have an award winning personality that makes them physically attractive to me. Again, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. It's easy for people to judge others based on their looks, age, sex...it's all BS.

I get A...HOLES WHO ONLY APROACH ME TO SEE IF THEY CAN GET THE "PRETTY" Girl. This whole thing is garbage. It is not easier for women who are considered attractive. This is because there are a bunch of AHs who only try to talk to them as a game/ego boost. I'm tired of it!! !! Like I said, I'd prefer an honest, caring, and genuine person rather than an A...H... Brad Pitt look alike. Some guys, will pretend to like women just to get something out of them and move on. Most of those AHs look for the "so called" hard to get ones/"attractive" to validate their pathetic existence.

Last edited by Loveurself on 27 Jun 2015, 6:05 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Also it is much harder for women in general. Why? Because a lot of people don't seem to think for themselves anymore. Why do people need to look at charts to decide what others find attractive or stupid commercials and movies to decide what is acceptable regarding beauty/attractiveness and relationships? Life is too short for that. I tend to march to my OWN drum. What I find sexy may be someone else's toad. Also why is it, that women are considered valuable goods between the ages of 18 and 29??? What?? So basically, based on those numbers, when I turn a certain age I should be either be married or dig my grave because our sexist society says so? Women are not just easy-bake ovens that are disposable when the baking is over... which does not stop at 29/30.

I agree with this, looks are just one aspect of attractiveness. Long term personality is much more important, jeez who wants to live with an externally beautiful but internally vapid person. I don't, I couldn't care how physically attractive they are, if there isn't an emotional attraction, forget it.
Besides, physical beauty deteriorates over time, personality can develop. Chasing women who prize appearance over more meaningful attributes, seems like it could only be a short term gain after squandering quite a lot of energy. This just makes no sense to me.

To me, that notion that "beauty is in the eye of the behold" is only SOMEWHAT true in the case of men. See, men's sexual prefferences are shaped in no small part by their experiences during their formative years. I for instance, have a thing for somewhat overweight women (not morbidly obese). Looking back, I now believe this is because during my childhood years I had a great friendship with a girl who was overweight herself.

As far as women are concerned, that notion simply doesn't apply. Women virtually all want the same type of man, regardless of their background, their experiences during childhood, or anything else.