sly279 wrote:
Loveurself wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Loveurself wrote:
StackedAces wrote:
It's a simple question with a long, complicated purview.
I haven't had a lot of girlfriends. At 24, 4 isn't a big number. But it's not that women are a struggle for me;
I'm so apt to fall madly in love with them that I've got no interest in any others. Well, recently the lady I
had been seeing for half a decade decided I'm not good enough. I know, boo freaking hoo right? Well, I've
been battling depression and extreme jealousy since she left but that's not really what I'm asking about. It
occurred to me just a while ago that perhaps we feel these things much more intensely than most.. so when
I think "How could she go be with other men and not even think about me," maybe it's another part of the
extreme aspie obsession the majority of us have come to terms with but on a bigger and more difficult scale.
No?
If that is really the case, then why do I continue to see so many posts about people that get dumped by their aspie boyfriends/girlfriends in the most cold and cruel way? If it is really "love" then why is it so easy to be in "love" one minute and then cold the next? Maybe it's just INFATUATION!! ! that only lasts until the next crush worthy obsession comes along.
Just for the record, most of those those people claim their partners are aspies- based on things they read, and not really diagnosed, I suggested once to Alex to add Wife-Suspecting-Husband-Having-AS as a diagnosis status for profiles.
I'm talking about the ones who are diagnosed. Some seem to have a total lack of empathy for the people they dump; someone they supposedly LOVED. It's amazing how some can move on at record speed.
well I could never do that .I'd probably stay in a loveless relation. I don't want to hurt people and I'm too loyal. but then I still love the past crushes or almost relationshps I had. I'd go right back to trying to get them to be my gf if they asked. love isn't something that fades for me.
Sometimes there is a choice between two bad situations.
If you see you repeatably hurt the one you love but you can't help it (for example there are constant misunderstandings related to your inability to read social cues and the person you are in love with happens to easily feel hurt) you know can either choose to:
- Stay in the relationship, knowing you will keep unintentionally hurting the person you love because there are just some things you have no control over.
- Break, knowing they will be badly hurt at first but deal with it eventually and possibly find someone who is a better fit for them.
It's like choosing a surgery (wound that is probably going to heal with time) over living with a defected organ causing chronic pain.