What Does Being "In Love" Feel Like For An Aspie?

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I love love. It's great, and I don't have any reason it feels different to me than it does to most other people, including NTs.

Maybe I asked the wrong question. How do you act when you're in love? How do you show the person you are in love with that you're in love with them?

I read that Aspies aren't able to show their feelings very well. Is that true?

Not for me, but I'm not tooooo deep in the Aspie Zone. When I'm in a relationship I do things like cuddle when possible, give her shoulder rubs if she's stressed, put notes with little hearts drawn on them in her purse, and send her good morning texts to help get her day off to a good start

Scary!

First off, it needs to be stressed that feeling "in love" is NOT at all the same as actually loving someone. Read this: https://realtruelove.wordpress.com/ and this: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/john-mcel ... 34780.html One should not feel guilty for not being "in love" as long as truly do love the person and the relationship is working out.

Secondly, regarding this "So do Aspies feel "love" or are friendships and relationships for Aspies seen as just a "need" when they have time for them?" the latter is completely untrue and a trait of psychopaths, not autistic people. People in general may expect different things in relationships though. The autistic person may not be aware of the needs on the other person's end, however, so. For your personal situation, you should tell your friend that it hurts you when he ignores your texts. If you don't say anything, he's not going to know. As for whether aspies ever feel being "in love" (I'd interpret feeling "love" as feeling that you are loved), it depends on the person. This goes for non-autistic people as well, not everyone is romantic.

Finally, to answer the topic question for me personally, I'll link a song:

It's such a mix of extreme feelings from all over the spectrum, happiness and anxiety and longing guilt. In general, my thoughts would be very much occupied by that person when "in love" with them. Whatever it is, being around that person will make me act differently, so whatever that is it's a sign of something.

Only experienced it once, really. Felt like being just the right amount of drunk for several days straight.

In my case it feels like the world's spinning. So many emotions rushing in every direction. I haven't felt that feeling for quite some time, now....

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An Asperger's man who has Autism Spectrum Disorder level 1- mild, with a sprinkling of Synesthesia.

My whole life I have disliked being touched by anyone except my parents. I know I love my family but I have a hard time telling anyone. As far as feeling in love with someone I never understand what that felt like and I didn’t even have my first crush until 17. When my bestfriend (also asperger) confessed that he loved me my response was “I don’t know what that feels like” I did research and realized that the feelings I had for him was also love. So, yes we can fall in love sometimes we have a hard time showing it though.

I'm very all or nothing. When i'm in love with someone everything about them gives me butterflies and I love their eyes, smile, voice, laughter, the way they move everything and I think about them a lot everyday and i've even experienced getting so overwhelmed with emotions i've nearly cried. I have issues putting those emotions into words though and feel embarrassed about displaying emotions.

For me if it's not like that it's kinda meh. Like I have male friends and I appreciete their friendship but it wouldn't kill me if the friendship ended. Maybe that's because I don't really feel a need for friends but I make friends because there are many things I wanna do that is boring or even scary to do alone and occasionally I can even enjoy social interaction. Mostly though making friends to me is a task, like going to work. Love is different though.

I don't know if that is typical aspie or just me.

Being in love is pretty intense for me. I have VERY STRONG feelings for her & I become OBSESSED with her.

Being "in love" is a kind of slavery. I believe in marriage for convenience, and wouldn't trust anybody who allows himself to be controlled by "love".

That's a bit cynical...

I knew when it finally happened to me when I met my soulmate. He was in a relationship but not really happy with it. He wasn't the type of guy my preconceived ideas had in mind, but we just clicked in every way and it was like being on a cloud.

Yes we are still together although not currently in the same city, and the fact that he understands me better than anyone else is fantastic. I am certain he's on the spectrum too.

For me the initial stage is extremely painful, it brings out a feeling I had at the age of 4, a crippling yearning for somebody I was extremely close to who I was then separated from, it's like grief but mixed in with hope that what I missed so much as a young child can be brought back to life from within the person I've fallen in love with. If that happens then it's relief from pain, it's comfort and a sense of belonging.

Firstly apologies. . . .i haven’t yet read all the post, but the initial post by nurse Angela is something I have wondered too.

My Aspie friend is married. . . Obviously I don’t know the intimacies of their relationship as that is rightly private, but he does almost everything separately, yet he says he loves her, and I believe him. I think maybe it is just a very different type of love than that I experience.

Also our friendship which is still ongoing, often feels as if it is only when I am needed that my friend contacts me. This year has been a tough year forus and has taken a lot of negotiating to get back on track, I have learnt to completely change my expectations it is a very different type of friendship than my others, but I do value it ,

No one in my social group understands why I care and why I don’t give up. They despair of me, and feel I am being used over and over again just when my Aspie friend needs me. However I certainly don’t think there is ever any intent to hurt or to use. . .. ..

I guess if I could understand his way of being and he could understand my way of being, there would be no issues, and no need for forums such as these. . .. . .. we are different - very different, but I do still hugely appreciate his knowledge, humour and gentle energy when we do spend time together .