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And if you made that bet, you'd lose. I've told my mother about it, and I've told my only female friend atm as well. She's not a prospective partner incidentally, being married and with a child, but I told her all the same. Why? Because I respect her and I care enough about her to let her know the type of person I truly am. As far as I'm concerned, all I did was purchase a service, but I know that's not how a lot of people see it. If she never wanted to see me or talk to me after that, then fine. It would wound me deeply, but at least I wouldn't have to live with the knowledge I was lying to someone I cared about.

And for that very same reason, I will also tell it to my future girlfriend or wife. If, like you said, I'm lucky enough to ever find one.

I'm glad you said that and are honest about it. I wish you didn't think that you had to do that instead of remaining a virgin, but it was your decision and now it's done. I have to say that it does matter to some women what their partner's past sexual experiences have been - I know I can't be the only one. I think you are a wonderful person to be upfront with whoever you are going to be with so they can make a decision of what they want to do. I wouldn't stop being your friend, I just couldn't be anymore than that. Everyone has their own moral code they live by and there are just some things I can't accept. I still haven't been able to get past my Aspie friend's idea of wanting to be a "swinger" and thinking of it like a business transaction - no feelings involved, each picks who their partner can have sex with and then you never speak to the other about it after it's over. I just can't wrap my mind around that and it being ok in a marriage and how he would be able to do it and think it is ok. I guess it's just the way I was brought up. I've learned a lot being on this site. I never knew that prostitutes were so widely used. I now know that I'm going to have to ask more questions of whoever I decide to be with and hope they will tell me the truth.

First off yes, you're a woman so you can't understand it, just deal with it. You can't know how it feels so just stop saying random stuff about it, it's nothing but annoying. I AM a 23 years old virgin and while I would never go to a prostitute (and it's not cause as you say, mr. Gauldoth, I don't have the balls for it, you dummy), I would never talk s**t of someone who does like this. I don't see why peope can have 9999 sexual partners (also one night stands) in their life but God forbit that you go to a prostitute. So hypocritical. And you talk like people who went to a prostitue should walk around with a banner on their forehead, how disgusting.

It is disgusting, sorry. Any woman who's concerned about her own gynecological health is going to want to know your history. Sleeping with a prostitute is like sleeping with all the guys she has ever been with, and if she's any good it will be more than anyone can count.

I wouldn't want to end up with cervical cancer caused by HPV or some other hidden disease. Women have a lot more to lose in this area.

Forgive me for having an opinion and saying it out loud. You're annoying, btw, and I wasn't talking to you so mind your own damn business. And most people wouldn't think it's ok to have 9999 sexual partners - I don't, so I'm not being hypocritical. Don't talk to me like that or you're going to get it right back - and right now I'm being nice.

Lol, it's not that because one went once with a prostitute he has sexual diseases. Let's be serious. Also same could be said about a woman/man who likes to sleep around.
Ohhhh and in countries where prostitution is legal I'd say that prostitutes' health is generally controlled.

I'm sorry and I apologise, it seems that I was overly angered by your words, but when you said that a decent woman wouldn't want to be with a guy who was once with a prostitute I just couldn't keep myself. I don't think such person is an "indecent man", that was quite offensive to me. Despite all of this, if I can asnwer your points:
This opinion thing is a fake argument. I can have wrong opinions but it doesn't mean that they are not wrong. Also you are talking on a forum, if you wanna talk in private with him send him a PM, don't talk here. 9999 was an hyperbole, it is generally accepted that a person has a certain number of sexual partners in their life (and also it is said that if a woman wants to have a one-night stand it is none's business but hers).
The fact that a person can have sex without loving doesn't mean that they are indecent and uncapable of loving. I just don't understand why people should be called indecent if they have sex without being in a relationship. And I wouldn't really be less annoyed by a girlfriend who had sex with former boyfriends, but maybe it's just me.
Also let me tell you that in some cases the fact that a person doesn't see prostitutes doesn't mean that he has a higher opinion of sex that one who does, in some cases people go to prostitutes just because they can't get sex at all otherwise.
On the top of this, what the guy said is true. There was once this girl I loved and she said she was my gf, but she once confessed that she didn't want to be with me cause I was a virgin. She said that virgins just want to have sex. Perhaps I am wrong about not going to a prostitute.

Hm, having sex with someone who's had 9999 sexual partners would mean I'm the 10 000th. That'd be cool.

I've never been a prostitute, but I've considered it (when I was younger, much younger.) And I wouldn't rule a guy out because he had been with one.
I think men do, in general, have a greater sexual need than women. And that it would be helpful if society would rid itself of the stigma of commercial sex.

Yeah and also of the stimga of casual sex for the women who like it, while for men it's widely accepted (unless it's with prostitutes).

I'd dump any guy who patronized a prostitute on the basis that there is clearly something seriously wrong with him if the zillions of women who have sex for free -- because it's fun & they wanna -- are unwilling to have sex with HIM for free.

Especially if he patronized a prostitute in a jurisdiction where prostitution's illegal, simply because there's a VERY high probability that said prostitute was trafficked, is underage and/or couldn't quit even if she wanted to (and do acknowledge that Brooke Magnanti-esque hookers do exist).

(Side note: I'm with the WHO and all for legalizing sex work. Bringing it out of the shadows makes it less dangerous for those who voluntarily CHOOSE sex work and easier to prosecute the folks who FORCE others into sex work. And I'd still dump any dude if I found out he'd bought sex -- ever, period).



Not sure what planet you're living on but, well, I know tons of women (including myself!) who had fun having a casual sex/hookup phase (for me, college and grad school, in between serious boyfriends) and don't appear to have been "stigmatized" by it.

Speaking only for myself, I'd say that it's not so much that aren't social consequences for a girl who did hookup (there was a boyfriend who dumped me when he found out I'd slept with a mutual friend years earlier, ie YEARS before I met, let alone started dating, that ex) but rather that the consequences are an excellent way of eliminating guys I'd never want to date in the first place.

I had no expectations other than honesty

So you'd dump him just because other women don't like him? That makes no sense and is sheep behaviour. Also the same argument could be used to dump people who never had a woman in general.

I agree with you on this, this is one of the reasons why I don't, and because the money would partly go to organized crime. I could still find one who does it because she likes and is indipendent, but I don't really like the idea of sleeping with random people. This however doesn't mean that it's ok to be mean to people who do.

Call me a monster if you like, but I don't see any difference between a guy who goes to a brothel and people like you who sleep around, in both cases it is consensual and loveless sex. Some guys just lack the social skills/sex appeal/confidence required to get casual sex.

I'm not talking about guys you'd date, I'm talking about people who'd call you a slut. They exist and frankly I'm happy if you haven't met any. Also often these things are said behind one's back, not to the face.

There seems to be a lot of criticism of people's input going on here. I know I'm not the boss of what you post but I did request that ideas you don't agree with be left alone, is it possible for that wish to be respected?

Good for you, keep doing what you are doing but don't give up on finding a partner beyond an impersonal sexual relationship.

Prostitution is a business that meets a demand and many women enjoy the objectification and lavish lifestyle that comes with it. Dating or hooking up in artificial social surroundings can be based on manipulation and trickery that isn't suited for everyone.

Many men are turning to prostitution because for a small sum of money, they can have any women they want to cater for whatever fantasy they desire. It's about catering to YOUR needs without any work or BS presentation beforehand.

Dating females is legal prostitution because the financial compensation is indirect and some women still require it. On average, after 3 dates, the female will let the man have sex with her. The man has spent approximately $225 on the female in almost 4 weeks of dating. So basically, the female required financial compensation before she would allow the man to have access to her body. That is prostitution, but it's the acceptable form by society's standards.

I recommend Cougars, some of them are willing to pay for the hotel or most of them will go halves..they require a lot less maintenance than young girls. Real relationships and sexual bonds are still better because of the emotional and personal connection but until you get there, you still have needs.

I'd like to recommend reflecting often about what one loves about Earth. Earth is pretty temperate you know...