It sucks how a pretty girl can date even if she's boring..

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For the guys moaning about no dates, when is the last time YOU asked a girl (pretty or otherwise) out on a date?

(Maybe I was shallow in my teens/twenties, but "hot" with nothing to back it up was fun for about three months. A lot of fun).

They ask out girls, but not you.

Just my two cents:

- A promiscuous girl who doesn't like you (because of low confidence, not being a party person, etc.) can still choose to sleep with you if she thinks you're attractive

- The first step to getting a steady girlfriend is overcoming shyness and expanding your social circle. After that, you can check out dating tips

If they're boring then there is no point envying them. They will continue to date equally boring people or make others miserable, if what you say is remotely true..remember it is an assumption created by your ego.

Question - Do you consider yourself an interesting person? And if so, has this been confirmed by other people?

yup, if theres anything I've observed, being spoiled, coddled, not given any or enough responsibility by your parents growing up has a worse effect on guys than it does on girls

Ummmm, no shortage of dates in my 20s dude. Wasn't complaining about lack of 'em.

Girls definitely DO face rejection. At least at my age, there's always been a strong prejudice against women who ask out men, so we found other ways to express interest in lads. Having your flirting and attention ignored is rejection, too. Even if we were completely passive waiting for the approach (which isn't the way it actually works), not being asked by guys you are interested in is also rejection.

Yes, this, all this.

I have a friend who met a man I had a crush on and she was all like:"he's so nice, you have to ask him out!" I had spent some time with him as just hanging about with friends and I was getting vibes that he wasn't interested. But she was like, "no ask him"

But I knew. I could tell. There was no point asking just to get a no so my friend could be happy that I'd made an effort.

He wasn't interested by the way and is with someone else.

But, yes, you can be rejected before you even ask.

That is mostly true. However, eventually those guys get to know their personalities and lose interest.

Some pretty girls go for the "ugly" guys because they look at their personalities and admire them. Also, it can be that in their eyes those guys are probably physically attractive due to their great personalities.

Something also annoying are those girls who act like every guy likes them. . . .

well you hardly ever hear of women being 25+ or 30+ years of age and never had a boyfriend, still a virgin, meanwhile it's not uncommon to hear of it the other way around

That's probably because as a man you don't have a large circle of female friends so don't know any women well enough to know their circumstances. I know a few women in those exact circumstances. I don't think they will ever find anyone. 3 of these women are over 40 and the rest I know are in their late 20s. You can't say women don't have this problem too. It's not true.

And now for the excuses. Ah but they're too picky, they're too ugly blah blah blah.

That's probably because as a man you don't have a large circle of female friends so don't know any women well enough to know their circumstances. I know a few women in those exact circumstances. I don't think they will ever find anyone. 3 of these women are over 40 and the rest I know are in their late 20s. You can't say women don't have this problem too. It's not true.

And now for the excuses. Ah but they're too picky, they're too ugly blah blah blah[/quote]

I've known girls who have always been singles, and most probably still totally virgins; my older sister who's 39 is one but I suspect she's asexual at times (by "totally virgins" here I mean they never had any intimate contact with a male, such as kissing and making out; many girls entering relationships remain virgin, pre-marital sex is still not the norm among many here especially among the Muslim girls; there's even a term for which translates to: “no one's kissed her mouth but her mother”).

it sucks that gender roles defines what a girl can do and cannot do. It's ok for a guy to ask out a girl, but not ok for a girl to ask out a guy, then she is called out names like "a slut". A guy, is just being a guy.

I made a comment about a woman posting a picture in a bikini, I thought that was brave. Guess who commented on my post? A guy, who implied that I had more intention with my post. So he was basically pulling me down into the bucket of crabs. Not allowed to step out of what is defined as "gender roles". She was ok with my post, but guys weren't and so were other women. Trying to make me feel guilty for being "confident".

So how does confidence work? Does it mean I have to ignore when others are trying to pull me down? I think it means, that I listen to myself first before I allow others to dictate to me how I should be.

So I believe girls are in the same boat when it comes to confidence, because there are a lot of other girls who will pull her down. So I guess confidence is rising up to what you feel is right and believing in yourself, while ignoring what others think of you and their games of trying to keep in you "in line".

Confidence is the ability to be able to filter criticism, you take the good out of it (constructive criticism), and discard the rest (by not taking it personally). This will help you focus on what you want in life and keep going after your own goals. We already know that you aren't like the other sheep. Remember fear is always used as a way to control people. It's used everywhere. Good example is "gangs". They will always use fear as a tactic to control, it's a powerful way of controlling people and it is nothing new.

So rise above this fear by listening to yourself, what you know is to be right and it should start to build. Being ok with one self is key. Keeping that in mind when someone criticises you, will help you with filtering these events.

I hope this helps.

Ding ding ding.

Most of heterosexual men's anxieties are caused by a lack of attention from the opposite sex, whereas most of heterosexual women's anxieties are caused by the wrong kind of attention from the opposite sex. And being perfectly frank here, being single is better than being used and abused. Not sure why we need so many banal "that feel when no gf" threads.

Another very common heterosexual man anxiety is the fear of the financially-conditioned love (losing job = losing her).

We men fear that as much as women fear that the love from their men might be very sex/looks-conditioned.

A former colleague and friend of mine, a graphic designer (in my former workplace) probed a lot into her fiancée's mind just to make sure she doesn't care about his money and status, he told her he could only afford a tiny house, he asked her a lot of 'what if...' questions; he watched her reciprocity in paying when they go out, he watched her reactions to gifts, he watched her willingness to buy him gifts, he watched her how she reacts to any hardship, he watched her reaction to his poor car...etc. He married her, and two other colleagues (both males) got married in the same summer.

2 year passed, company unexpectedly went bankrupt, we all lost our jobs for a while and it took us long months to find new ones, my friend's wife (who works as fresh graduate kindergarten teacher, so it's a very low paying job - while him as graphic designer he didn't accumulate much wealth) sticked to her husband during 6 months of unemployment (they recently had a baby after him finding a job.) while the two other colleague's marriages collapsed in an ugly way a month after the job loss, both divorces were initiated by the wife (despite their wives work in much higher positions, one is senior manager, the other is senior CFO, the latter had to convert to Christianity to marry her guy). Coincidence? I think not.

My friend's approach proved to be wiser, he knew wisely how to pick.

That's a bit like saying going hungry is better than eating poisoned food.

Also there are many of these posts because wanting to be in a loving relationship is a very normal human desire.