Creepshamed and felt like an outcast

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She's probably just one of those people who are devoid of logic, it's a condition that's quite common.

What's happening with society? It seems like a lot of people are just out to get each other. I really feel like a misanthrope sometimes despite the friends and family I have.

People in cosplay aren't purely looking for attention. They're trying things out, expressing some special interest, experimenting with identity. It isn't always comfortable and the clothes are different and often more revealing than they'd normally wear. It's kind of a stretch especially in your youth. So at cons I've usually seen a vulnerable mixture of feelings than "look at me look at me". It's good for a con. You can't really judge if it's logical because you don't know their motivations and feelings.

But regardless, if someone reports you for harassment once, you should absolutely never start a conversation with them again. Even apologizing can go off wrong. You just have no idea what's going on in their head except that you need to stay away and enjoy all of the other people instead.

I know there is double standard shaming in this, but I do believe if you cosplay, dress sexy, you deserve the attention, even from creepy guys because you're attractive.

Double standards hurt society as a whole and apparently not enough people see it.

You probably don't see it, but this is a telling response. People find that kind of entitlement scary. Since folks like us don't always catch the social cues, you might want to create and follow some rules for yourself on how to act around attractive females, and see if things work out better - ie not getting reported for harassment and getting to stay for the full conference.

It may not feel fair, but it probably doesn't feel fair to her either - you have no idea what's going on in her head.

The intention is to dress like a character you like not necessarily to be sexy.

Also there are different types of attention. Like looking at them and taking picture with their permission is of course fine.

Leering and making suggestive comments is not (I'm not saying you did I'm just talking in general).

Once is okay; a second picture is a little overly interested. Especially if you just met her at the convention.

Really? Why is a woman expressing her creative playful side automatically her wanting to be perceived as sexy. That is your assumption, you don't know what her intention was?
And you think creepy behaviour is acceptable because of an assumption? Or at all?

And who are you to say that? She had a different dress and they knew each other from the day before, if he wanted to ask for a pic with this new costume too there is nothing wrong with it. It's so funny how you people seem to agree with this crazy woman, makes me lose all faith in human relationships.

Really? Why is a woman expressing her creative playful side automatically her wanting to be perceived as sexy. That is your assumption, you don't know what her intention was?
And you think creepy behaviour is acceptable because of an assumption? Or at all?[/quote]
Why the bloody hell is it creepy behaviour to do what he did? It is not, and if what he said is true then she is nuts.

Sure just because a woman has a costume that is a bit sexy it doesn't mean that people have to make stupid remarks about it (and it seems that the OP didn't), but acting as a psycho like she did and putting into trouble a guy who didn't do anything bad seems a very wrong way to deter it.

Last edited by Peacesells on 11 Jul 2016, 2:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.

What do you mean deserve? If she wants to dress a bit sexy it is her business, it doesn't mean that she "deserves" attention. What does deserve mean anyway? She didn't do anything bad.

Another thing, if you want to dress in a way that is a sexier/more revealing than usual then it is fine, but if you are not comfortable with it then just choose another bloody dress, don't go around in it and then act as a psycho if a guy wants to take a pic with you.

"Crazy, nuts and psycho;" Wow, the trifecta of troll insults.

A wrong way to deter what? Perceived creepiness by a guy who didn't do anything? That doesn't make any sense.

Peacesells, it seems that androbot is preparing for escalated trouble and for an offense accusation against you - and to report you to a mod (just because you said that this girl in his story may be crazy).

If I were you, I would ignore her and stop replying her.

Boo, I've been on here since 2011 and I have never reported one person. I can fight my own battles, thanks.

And, this is a good reminder to stay away from the L&D threads. I don't need to relive my 20's nor try to help anyone else do theirs. Have fun y'all.

Your clique buddies will do tho, if you continue to escalate things unessarily, and so what if he calls her nuts? She is not a wp member.
When ladies start threads here complaining about their men everyone call them jerks and as*holes, and no one gets offended.

Anyway I don't want to talk you androbot, leave me alone.

I am not trolling and what I say is true. Maybe that doesn't make sense to you, but what doesn't make sense is to call the security for a guy who asked to take a pic together at a comicon. These accusations are very serious and she could get him in real trouble. But who cares? He is a guy after all.

I said you were throwing insults like a troll.

I find picture taking to be very intrusive. She may have, she may not have, she may have been undecided. Who knows. It is an anecdote. You asked "who are you to say;" I'm one person with one opinion. Personally, I think he should have just asked her out on the first day when she said he could take her picture; for me it would have been then or never; but that's me.