Is it ok for someone to say they want a (insert race) boyfri

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I would definitely class it as racist if someone excluded or segregated certain races based on sweeping generalizations based on their stereotypical views. The fact that she is objectifying someone based on their race as a novelty or sex object for her own gain is morally wrong and unfortunately, people might not challenge her viewpoint.

Yep, this.

This has been a hot topic in the gay community this year. Age/race/type/look etc preferences vs. being more open to all. Doesn't bother me one bit if someone is truly equally attracted to everyone, but I have my own innate preferences and most others have theirs. It is what it is for each of us & that's what people need to learn to accept.

Thats utterly rediculous. Why is it racist to not be attracted to darker skin tones or more almond shaped eyes?Thats like attempted thought policing. Why would such a negative label be attached to an honest personal preference.... its like calling someone ignorant for saying they dislike certain genres of music... Im guessing your collection includes very little, if any, rap, dance, pop or country music... so... just saying is that a right assumption? No, because you like what you like and its no one elses business, and your tastes in one thing are not indicative of who you are as a whole.

I can honestly say in my entire life Ive never seen a black, asian, or middle eastern woman I found attractive. A few light skinned hispanics here and there. And I grew up in a very black/hispanic area... I actually sorta wish I did like black women cuz they always seem to have loved me, especially back in school... but no good. Just not into it...

I mean I dislike when a white girl has a suntan... irs unattractive to me. Im attracted to pale skin and very round eyes and full, round face... these are traits only white women have. I cant help what I like.

Whats worse, beig honest about what I like, or act like I dont feel that way to appease the hive? Cmon now... Forced 'open mindedness' is more poisonous a concept than any bigoted view ever was or will be.

I don't think that is racist, more like if one was attracted to a person of another race/ethnicity but would turn them down for dating simply because of their race. I mean I imagine if you saw a women of one of those ethnicities you did find attractive you likely wouldn't try to deny it to yourself simply because you haven't seen one you found particularly attractive I'd imagine. Someone who is racist however would likely tell themselves the attraction is wrong, and deny it.

Difficult to describe such a fine line....but to clarify I'd say turning someone down simply because of their race regardless of being attracted to that particular individual would be racist. Basically thinking it is 'wrong' to date someone of a different race would be racist. Since one cannot control what they find sexually attractive and what they don't, if someone simply hasn't seen a person of a particular ethnicity they found attractive I do not think that would be racism.

To be honest I could certainly say I've mostly been attracted to guys of more northern european descent like Germanic and Nordic decent....that is closest to my ethnicity, but I have certainly been attracted to people of other ethnicities though not as often.

I don't think people should put on an act to be more open minded/accepting or whatever if they aren't because I like to know whether i should associate with someone or not...I'd prefer a racist be open about that so I can then not hang around them for instance.

Last edited by Sweetleaf on 14 Oct 2016, 1:36 pm, edited 2 times in total.

That is so ridiculous. So I should go date a black woman, even though I find them extremely unattractive, because otherwise, I'm not being politically correct, right? Give me a break.

She doesn't mean it like that. I think Sweetleaf meant that if you turned down a person because of their race even if you find them attractive it could be racist because it's the only thing that bothers you

There are billions of black women in the world.

If you find them *all* extremely unattractive then yeah... it's because a strong subtle racism inside you that makes you see them *all* that way.

No that is not what I mean at all. I mean if you found a black woman attractive and she's intrested in you but you won't date her just because she's black that would be racist.

Dating someone you find to be very unattractive who is of a different ethnicity just to be politically correct would be ridiculous, you're right but it is not what I was suggesting.

Yes, this.

I'm with mistersprinkles on this one. There are many people of every race that I can agree are very attractive people, however, there are some races that I'm very attracted to and others I'm simply not.

Suggesting that people ought to somehow magically forcibly make themselves sexually attracted to all races equally is as ridiculous as me suggesting that a straight man ought to be attracted to me regardless of the fact that he's innately only attracted to females. Think about it.

No its because I think dark skin is unattractive as well as typical black facial features.... i just do... its that simple. I mean really wouldnt care about admitting if I were a racist. I dont think its as terrible thing as most of you because I respect individual thought. And part of thatis accepting ways of thinkjng you do not like or ageee with

Um you missed my point.

I didn't day you had to be attracted to every race

I said if you reject them for their race even when you find them attractive . I even said in a previous post you can't help who your attracted too

How can you even tell someone is rejecting someone else for their race despite finding them attractive, as opposed to rejecting them because they truly don't find them attractive?

Ok, talking about individual thoughts, you shall also respect mine, right? and my thought about every one who says "I am not racist but... " .... "for dating..." "no blacks" / "no asians"/"no indian plz"/ "no arabs" /"no whites"(I have never saw the latter) is that:

Racism. This woman (or man) is racist in some form.

Please do not consider it as a personal attack against anyone - this is just my individual thought.

This is a good article; it': about gay dating - but also relevant for straights:

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2 ... acism.html

There is a big differnce between stating "no blacks" on a dating/hookup profile, and who you are attracted to.

That perception can be challenged, but is in within the realms of personal choice.

I absolutely accept yours. Because it is your right and when it comes down to it your opinion of me means nothing to me...

However, I will argue of I feel someone is forming their opinions on flawed or forced logic... and I feel anyone making this claim is.

Firstly, were in social world that amounts to racial McCarthyism. (McCarthiesm was an American period where there was a pronounced anti-communist paranoia and there was an active witch hunt to find 'reds', just a refernce, this phenomena evidently holds true around the world as the thought police close in)

In this, people who are viewed as 'anti-racist' are commended and viewed as forward thinking, modern and well educated. So people are quick to jump pn that bandwagon. Even if they feel the opposite? What better way to prove to the rest of the hive that your not 'racist' then to librally go around accusing everyone and everything with any racial tone as racist. In my opinion people with this view have been conditioned to have it. Pointing out how racist evrything is without using common sense to adhere to a group think mentality is a cleat indiction to me. I simply cannot imagine how ones sexual preferences can be racist... by no doubt the same people that would chastize me if I said I thought it was wrong to be gay. 'People are born with their sexual attraction' those people will say constantly... and im not arguing or confirming that idea myself, but the point is you cant have it both ways to accuse others of prejudice...

Either you believe sexual attraction is innate or you dont. This would then apply to races as well. Or you're just picking and choosing. Which is your right as well. People have inconsistent views. We all do. But in the interest of discussion, I think ita important for you to recognize the hypocrisy of this argument.

If I recall correctly, you have expressed in past discussions the strong preference for not dating overweight women. Maybe Im recalling incorrectly, but I could have sworn we once had a discussion on this as I am, as some know, very attracted to chubby girls. I love think women. Thin or athletic ones are generally not as attractive to me either...

But if you, in fact, have this preference, should I not then accuse you of being bigoted against overweight people?

Also Ill say that, in my opinion, if one can say theyre attracted to every race, they are desperate and forcing the issue. Animal, mineral, or vegetable... Or they really sohave a preference but will not admit it openly. Which to me is shameful.

As far as that 'study' so many of these things make me laugh... its so easy tocthrow around claims backed by some bogus survey that perhaps never even happened. Whenevet I hear 'survey/numbers/study confirms' I am skeptical. All these things are conducted with intent to draw certain conclusions, and designed as such.

I am not attacking you or your view, but I am challenging it. I am one of the few people here that can do this without taking it or making it personal. Just to be clear. I reapect anyones views, but I will voice my opposition in a reasonable way.